Surrogate Mothers

United States
June 12, 2007 7:21am CST
I am going to be a surrogate mom for a couple who cant have a baby. Well they can concieve but the woman cant carry the baby because she was born without a uturs. I know what joy a baby brings to a family because I have a son of my own. I have always wanted kids and if I was told I couldnt carry my own baby I would be heartbroken. We are going to go through councleing and all that, just to make sure that the IP's (intended parents) are really ready. I am!! i want to be pregnant again but yet I dont think that I can raise another baby yet, for my son is only 8 1/2 months old. So this works out great! I get to be pregnant but I dont have to be selfish and bring another baby into this world when I know I wont be able to handle the responibilties just yet. my husband is behind me 110% as is the rest of my family. They think its wonderful what I am doing for another couple! Would you ever do something like this? Or if you are a guy would you ever let your wife/gf do something like this? We are planning on giveing my son a brother or sister when he is about 2-3 yrs old. this way he can "help" with the next baby, and it will be alot easier on me!
5 people like this
8 responses
@KissThis (3004)
• United States
12 Jun 07
I think that it is a wonderful gift that you are giving this couple. It is nice that your family supports you doing this as well. No I wouldn't be able to be a surrogate mother even if I wanted to. The last two times I have gotten pregnant I have had a miscarriage each time. If I was able to carry another baby full term then I would be selfish an keep the child to raise myself.
2 people like this
• United States
12 Jun 07
yes i could understand that. if i lost 2 pregnancies then i dont think i could do it eaither. but i have been lucky and was successful my first time.
1 person likes this
@smacksman (6072)
13 Jun 07
What a wonderful thing to do. Good for you and I hope it all goes well. Give the wee baby a hug from smacksman before you hand him over.
1 person likes this
@lpetges (3036)
• United States
13 Jun 07
i have a friend who did this for her sister. She was more than happy to help her out, since they had tried to be pregnant for over 7 years with no luck. i asked her how she could give birth to this baby, and not want to keep it, and then seeing it all the time would be so hard. She told me that she never felt it was her baby in the first place, that she was just the oven for the baking! and that when she sees how happy that her sister and husband are-it made it all the more justifiable to her! so i think you are doing the most unselfish, wonderful thing another human being can do for someone! You are a godsend! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for letting me see your discussion- i wish you much luck!!!
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
12 Jun 07
I have actually thought about this, I could do it, but only for someone in my family, because I'd want to make sure I was a part of the kids life. I think otherwise it would be too hard. If one of my siblings ever had a hard time concieving (which two of them have had children (actually one's preggers) and the last one isn't married yet, so it'll be awhile for him)I would totally carry a child for them though. Even though my pregnancies are difficult ( I get bad morning sickness) It's only nine months, that will bring a life time of joy, happiness and fufillment for them. and think abuot the bond you would have with that neice or nephew. wow. (:
1 person likes this
• United States
12 Jun 07
well me and the IP's are already getting pretty close and she said that she would want me to stay in touch afterwards. so its not like i would never see the baby afterwards. and i know how much happiness a baby can bring to someone, especially if they cant have one of their own.
1 person likes this
@Ravenladyj (22920)
• United States
12 Jun 07
Oh that is fantastic!! What a wonderful thing for you to be doing!! I would love to be pregnant again but I couldnt be a surrogate simply becuase I'd want to keep the baby all to myself LOL I actually LOVED being pregnant...even with all the complications there were with my youngest child I loved being pregnant!...Its an incredible feeling IMO....Kudos to you for doing this for the couple thats just fabulous!!! As for you having a second one of your own when your little one is 2 - 3 yrs old...My oldest son was 18 months old when I had my daughter and it really did work out nicely....I mean there were certain things he couldnt help with obviously but he had his own baby (Tommy which I still have LOL) that he could tend to while I was tending to his sister.....Now mind you, they are 13.5 and 12 yrs old and they do bicker like crazy at times but at the same time they are also VERY CLOSE...they watch out for each other, they talk about stuff together, they hang out together and so on so as much as there are issues when they get older it still really was great having such a short time between them
1 person likes this
• United States
12 Jun 07
yes i did want my kids to be close but then i really thought about it and i knew it wasnt for me. yes my first pregnancy was pretty bad (with the morning sickness) but i loved every part of it!
1 person likes this
@Gemmygirl1 (2868)
• Australia
1 Jul 07
I take my hat off to women like you & families like yours who do such a selfless act for another person/childless family. I don't believe i could do it - i think having pregnancies too close together is bad for the body so that is why we're waiting before we have another but the other is because i remember how attached i got to my HUGE belly & am unsure about if i could just carry another one & give to the new family, without getting attached. I think there need to be more people like you in the world coz giving the gift of a child is such a generous & selfless act. I think maybe a little further down the track once i am done having a family of my own, i could very well consider doing it but in between children of my own, i don't think i could - my body needs a break from all the stress!
@jennybianca (12912)
• Australia
13 Jun 07
This is a wonderful act to perform, to carry another couple's baby. The couple are fortunate that it is legal where you live, & that they have you to do this for them. I gather the egg & sperm are united in a test tube, & then implanted in you. Did you know the couple before hand? I think the counselling, & good health hchecks for you are a good idea. I would not be able to do this, as my first & only pregnancy was fraught with problems. I hope you keep us informed.
@castleghost (1304)
• United States
12 Jun 07
I don't think that I would like for my fiancee to carry someone elses child. I would express how I feel to hear but the final decision would be hers to make. I think that what you are willing to do is very admirable and I wish you the best of luck.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Dec 07
Wow. You have probably now a 1.5 year old (judging from the time lapsed since you wrote this) and were going to help someone out. It's something I never could do. Well, maybe if someone paid me a lot of money to borrow my body, but I could not do it out of the generosity of my own self.