What would you tell a friend if ...

Canada
June 12, 2007 10:27pm CST
she was married to a guy who ran around on her with all her friends , including her own sister ( she knows about this ) , has a severe drinking problem and doesn't come home half the time . He says he loves her and that he will stop and that he hasn't run around on her in years but now is staying at a much older woman's house all hours of the night and only comes home when he feels like it . Doesn't answer his cell phone when she calls and on their daughters' second birthday he showed up the ten minutes before everyone was to arrive and passed out on the couch in front of all the guest . She says she loves him but is never happy and doesn't have a way to support her children . You don't have the money to offer to her and she doesn't know anyone who could help her out . You know that she is depressed but doesn't know what else to do but remain in the relationship . What would you suggest would be the best thing to tell a good friend of yours that you didn't want to see hurt this way ?
5 responses
@pinklilly (3443)
• Australia
13 Jun 07
You seem like a great friend who really cares about her if she is in deneil get some proof and then get her to face up to him and tell him to get out... It must be hard for her and you to watch it happen, you need to be there for her and offer any support you can... She doesn't need him dragging her down especially if his not willing to make an amends and continue his childish behaviour...
1 person likes this
• Canada
13 Jun 07
Thanks , she is a really good friend and has been there for me when I needed someone in the past . We have children close in age and always have a good time togeher but I can see that she is not happy and that she is at a loss of what to do anymore . Thank you for your response .
• United States
13 Jun 07
I would be there for her, and I would tell her that there is a way to get out of the situation, is there a way that you could take her in? You are a friend and you seem to really care for her. Tell her she means a lot to you and that you hate to see her hurt this way, tell her she deserves to be happy with someone who cares. She needs to not be afraid to take a stand, tell her you will be there with her and stand by her no matter what. She seems to need that from what you've written. I think that is what I would do. I'd be there.
1 person likes this
• Canada
13 Jun 07
I would take her in but I can't afford to as she is not working and either am I right now . We are seven people in a three bedroom house at the moment and she has four children of her own and I would have no place to put them up . I would take her in , in a heartbeat if there was anyplace to put them but the house is so tiny and even the couch is always being used up and she has babies and I wouldn't ahve a place to put the crib and the playpen . She also dosen't get along very well with my husband and I can see that ended in a big fight . She knows I would do anything for her and that I am there for her but she is worried about how she is going to support herself and her children and she says she still loves him and she is scared . Her family is not there for her and she doesn't have many close friends and they are tired of hearing her complain as this has been going on for years and just don't want to hear about it anymore . I understand how upset she is and just don't know what to tell her anymore . Thank you for your response .
@magica (3707)
• Bulgaria
13 Jun 07
I will advice her, but very carefully.Sometimes the love is blind. So i will try to show her the real facts without to be aggresive and to impose my opinion. And i will be near if she needs me.
1 person likes this
• United States
13 Jun 07
I'm glad to know that she has a person who cares for her (that's you). I think she's thankful that she has someone to turn to talk and share about her situation. I wish I know how to help her, but I really don't know how. However, I would definitely pray for her.
1 person likes this
• Canada
13 Jun 07
Thank you , she is a really good friend and I am here for her if she needs me , just wish I knew what to tell her . I am here for her anytime she needs to talk to someone but sometimes that doesn't seem like enough . Thank you for your response .
• China
13 Jun 07
At first , i want to say i am sorry to hear that! She is not happy and her children are not happy too, i think! She should leave the man and become a new life! I think the man is not love her for truth
1 person likes this