Do you support international adoption?

@rx4life (1931)
United States
June 17, 2007 8:28pm CST
My daughter and son-in-law wanted to have more children (they have 2 boys)but the pregnancies from the first 2 were both high risk and the doctors told them they shouldn't get pregnant again for fear of a bad outcome...they decided they wanted to adopt and did extensive research on the subject. A couple of years ago they listed to adopt internationally...( from China) and have been waiting patiently since. Recently they were given the option of adopting a child with a mild disability (club foot) and have been chosen as the couple to adopt this adorable little girl. They will be travelling to China in September or early Oct to pick her up and bring her home. We all have her picture printed out and hung in our homes and are waiting excitedly for her arrival. I will stay here in the US and take care of the boys ( ages 4 & 6) for the 2.5 weeks they will be gone. It is so exciting and I have fallen head over heels in love with this beautiful little girl before ever meeting her...I'm silly and I talk to her picture and tell her how happy I am she will be my grandaughter...the boys are really excited about having a sister...I have told the story to people I know and most think it is wonderful...but recently one person told me that no one should adopt from a different country because it is too stressful for the child to grow up in an environment so different from their "roots"..I disagree...I think we are giving her a chance to have her leg corrected and also a loving family that will always be there for her and love her unconditionally. Is it just our family or do you also agree that blood relationship isn't the most important thing...a person can love someone just as much whether they gave birth to them or not...and children of mixed families can be very happy even though there are apparent differences...it is all in your heart and willingness to love...Do you agree or do you think one should only adopt from their own country?
7 people like this
15 responses
@howard96h (11642)
• New York, New York
18 Jun 07
That is wonderful, best of luck to your famly and it doesn't matter where she is from, there is love in the home and that's all that matters!
3 people like this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I agree!!! It is so exciting and I can hardly wait!
1 person likes this
@egortizv (225)
• United States
18 Jun 07
international adoptions are fine. my brother best friend...their family is Dominican and they adopted a beautiful 5 year old from russia. and she has become a part of the family. dont stress over it.
3 people like this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
18 Jun 07
My only stress is having to wait until September!!! :)
1 person likes this
@abbey19 (3129)
• Gold Coast, Australia
18 Jun 07
I think what your daughter and son-in-law are doing - adopting a little girl from a different country (China) - is absolutely wonderful. This little girl needs a family who will love her no matter what, and in the end, that is all that matters, isn't it? To be loved in a secure and happy home is the best thing we can give a child - whatever country they are from.
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
18 Jun 07
We are so ready to share our love with this little one...all of us are so excited...I am beginning a journal written to her so that someday she can read all about the preparations and the emotions we are all feeling...I tell her in it how exciting it is to see her new pictures and how her brothers to be are saying such cute things about how fun it will be.. Thanks for responding Abbey....I can hardly wait until the final papers are signed and she is here and I can post her picture!!!
2 people like this
@abbey19 (3129)
• Gold Coast, Australia
18 Jun 07
What a great idea doing a journal for this little one so that in later years she can read it and see exactly how you were feeling about her coming into your lives, and see just how excited you all were. It will be treasured by her, I'm sure. You are all doing a wonderful thing for this little girl, and it warms my heart to know that such people like you and your family still exist. Best wishes to all of you. You should send us a photo of her and keep us up to date on her progress.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37377)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I think it's the most wonderful thing that any of us can imagine is taking a child and giving them the opportunity to really live! She is already so loved that how could anyone object to bringing her a country where there is so many waiting to love and nuture her! You are wonderful people and she is a very lucky little girl that you have all opened your hearts to her!
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
18 Jun 07
We are the lucky ones...a little loving soul out there destined to live in a overcrowded orphanage...and God blessed us to be the family that will shower her with love and goodness...we are blessed and so excited!!!
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37377)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I am sooooooooo happy for all of you!
@lillake (1633)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I can see both sides of this. On one hand there are many children right here in America who need caring parents to adopt them. Many with medical problems that need treatment. Also I can see how it can difficult and in some cases possibly even damaging emotionally or mentally to remove a young child from their culture and home. Especailly an older child to whom the vast change would be a huge culture shock. On the other hand there are many areas where medical treatment is unavailable or scarce. Bringing a child to the United States that needs treatment that they would be unable to find in their home area can be a great thing for the child. Also I think as long as the parents are loving and are willing to deal with any challenges that adopting from outside the country can bring, as well as being able to treat their adopted child both as an equal to their own children and with respect to their differences that where they choose to adopt from should not matter.
2 people like this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
18 Jun 07
THis child is only 7 months old and due to her disability they said there is only a 10% chance she would ever be adopted...I know there are many needy and unloved children in this country..and they may adopt from this country if they adopt another child...but for now they are saving a little girl from a possible future of growing up in an overcrowded orphanage and not having an opportunity to be able to walk..they are very loving people and will definitely encourage her to learn all she can and all they can about her culture...thank you for your response.
1 person likes this
@eden32 (3975)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I think it's great that your children were willing to adopt a child from another country & one with a disability. Other countries often have children sitting in foster homes & orphanages for years waiting to be adopted. Your children can still teach her about her heritage & culture, while being part of a loving & secure home. My nephew was adopted from Honduras as a baby. He's now an adult of 23. He is as much a part of our family as any of the ones we share DNA with. Congratulations on your new granddaughter :)
2 people like this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
18 Jun 07
Thank you so much!!! We are all so very happy and blessed to have the opportunity to add such a beautiful little soul to our family!
1 person likes this
@gabs8513 (48708)
• United Kingdom
18 Jun 07
I think you should adopt the Child that you want and if that is the Child you have all fallen in love with then good. When you adopt it does not have to be from your own Country, they are better looked after then the ones in places like China and that I admire your Daughter and Son in law for this I really do I know you will all make sure the little Girl is very happy and grows up surrounded by Love
1 person likes this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
1 Jul 07
She will be loved, for sure...she already is...our hearts are more involved everyday!!! I have begun a journal to her, telling her of the feelings and preparations we are making in anticipation of her arrival and addition to our family...I think it will be nice for her to have someday when she is older...Thanks for the support..you're a dear!!
1 person likes this
@gabs8513 (48708)
• United Kingdom
1 Jul 07
Awwwwww that is such a lovely Idea and I am sure she will be loved so much I hope you will show me a Picture of her one Day if not here let me know and I will send you my Addy xx
• United States
19 Jun 07
Aw I think this is great for your family! I honestly think it probably just depends on how the child is brought up. I mean even children who are adopted from the same country as the parents will sometimes face trauma because they don't know their birth parents. But I think as long as the child is able to ask questions, and is able to keep and open relationship with his/her adopted parents about where they originated, things will turn out just fine. :)
1 person likes this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
1 Jul 07
She will definitely be completely informed about her birth culture and always loved on every level...we are blessed she has been directed to us!!!
@addysmum (1225)
• Canada
18 Jun 07
Adoption of any kind is a great thing. My husband and I where on several adoption lists until we accidentally got pregnant with our second, we only want 2 kids so we pulled ourselves off of the lists. Your family will be giving this little girl a great life. In China she would not have a chance, because of her disability she would not get a family in China. A friend of my in laws just got home with their little girl from China and they said it was so sad to see all these great little kids being turned doing by their own people for little things. Their little girl has no hand, it was severed by the umbilical cord at birth. My father in law has spent countless hours with her and didn't even know until my mother in law and I where talking about her. what a great thing your daughter and son in law are doing. Give that baby a kiss from me and my family.
1 person likes this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
1 Jul 07
That happens alot...get on the list and "poof" you're pregnant!! Good for you...And your friends are to be commended for saving a little girl and giving her all the opportunities available...mainly LOVE...we are looking forward to this beautiful gift for our family....she is part of it already..even if it isn't the physical part yet!!! But the countdown is on ...we were out helping pick out paint today for her room...and my daughter is doing a huge tree mural on the wall that will incorporate wonderful images and colors...many with ties to her birth culture!! It's very exciting...and the boys are so thrilled...they speak about her as if she is here already...they include her counting family members and such..it's so cute...
@ememj12 (43)
• Philippines
18 Jun 07
as long as a couple can provide the needs of their adoptive children/childrens its fine with me. They shouls be physically, emotionally, morally and spritually ready for this kind of responsibility.
1 person likes this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
1 Jul 07
You are so right and they are so ready in all of those categories!!!
@Celanith (2334)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I have known many people who adopted children from other nations. Most adapt well. It is great your giving a child a home that needs one. However I wish more people would look closer to home there are thousands of American children aching for a home and they are rarely considered which is very tragic. How can Americans keep adopting from overseas and paying a lot more money and expenses when there are children right here in the USA. That is what I protest about. Why don't people want to adopt children from our own nation needing a home and love?
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
1 Jul 07
They did consider adopting from our own country..and were put through so many hoops and barriers...so many heartaches...it is criminal that some of the adoption laws in this country exist...many of them actually seem to discourage the adoption in my opinion...they decided to adopt from the place they could get a child first....having the age span between the last of their children and the new child be as short as possible so that the children would grow up together and not be separated by too much time....they were very conflicted about some of the new rules...this is God's plan right now...in the future they may choose a child from the US...they plan on getting involved in affecting change in the current laws of adoption...Thanks for your comments and concerns...
@KissThis (3004)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I think that it doesn't matter where the child is adopted from as long as the child recieves the love and care that they need. This child is young enough that she won't remember anything about her homeland unless her new parents tell her about it. I think that it would be nice if your daughter and son in law do teach the child about her culture so that she doesn't lose that part of herself. Enjoy your new granddaughter because she truly is a happy blessing to your family.
1 person likes this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
1 Jul 07
Thanks for the kind words and good thoughts...we will love her unconditionally :)
@majiwu (11)
• China
18 Jun 07
to begin with .I think the most important thing is not one should adopt from their own country but whether will the little child enjoy his or her life .meanwhile child isn't a goods .he or her has thought ,love ,and so on So we should think in his or her angle . the last but not the least i think a better environment plays a important part in children's growth . A better environment may give children a better opportunity to the development of children's personality and temperament . so if the little adorable girl like ,it's not a bad idea to adopt her
1 person likes this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
18 Jun 07
We will offer her every oppotunity possible and love her unconditionally..we know it's the right thing to do...
@jb_vete (323)
• Philippines
18 Jun 07
Yes. There is no big deal for me watever the race may be. As long as the intention is good, there's no problem for me.
1 person likes this
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
18 Jun 07
The intention is definitely good...and we see things in our family as boundless when it comes to love and care. We are very happy.
@mike2003 (287)
• Philippines
18 Jun 07
I do support international adoption. So many stories of this have turned-out well both for those who adopted and the children adopted. Besides I believe,we are now in a world without borders. These practices will also help to lessen prejudice and bias against race.I hope I contributed.
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
18 Jun 07
THank you for your contribution...I agree wholeheartedly with your comments!!