How far will you go?

United States
June 18, 2007 7:48am CST
How far will you go to make your spouse happy? Will you allow things that you would normally get anoyed by if you knew it would make them happy? I found myself in that situation yesterday. See it was my partners birthday so I had to put my own personal feelings aside and allow him to have his day and be able to enjoy it. I hate bars and I hate being around him when he drinks. (my own issues not his) However, I promised him that for his birthday we'd go to his favorite bar and he could drink as much as he liked. I knew it was something that he wanted to do and didn't do often and it was a special reason for it. So for everyone else how far will you go to make your partner happy?
4 people like this
17 responses
@Ravenladyj (22936)
• United States
18 Jun 07
hhhm thats a tough one...I would probably only go so far as to keep him happy but not so far that it could create a potential situation between us...Me getting overly annoyed isnt a good thing so as much as I'd want him to be happy I really do have to take into consideration my mindset and mood etc etc cause if I'm not in the right frame of mind or mood and do something like that the end result would be rather nasty...
2 people like this
• India
18 Jun 07
Well lots of people say that they can do any thing for their love.even i can do lots of things but i have my own ethics and some dos and donts defined clearly.if ur spouse really loves u he or she wont ask you to do anything that will hurt him or her.its about respecting each others sentiments and even their liking and even ethics.so love cant always be blind to ignore anythng and evrythng.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
19 Jun 07
personally, I believe that in every relationships, you have to learn how to give and take...I am a person who will do anything for love..but i have my own limitations. I'll only give and take what i think is beneficial for both of us...
1 person likes this
@vokey9472 (1488)
• United States
18 Jun 07
It really depends on the situation. I will do just about anything short of compromising my own morals and principles. I do not tolerate drunkeness of any short so going to a bar and letting him drink his fill, would not happen in my marraige. I do not like drunk people's behavior and I will not play babysitter to a drunk man of 36. I would, however, let him go to the bar with his friends and if he got drunk that would be his friends' problem and not mine. Like this coming Tuesday, my husband if going to a friend's house to play some game and drink and stuff. I am not going. I don't want to go, but I know that it will make him happy, so I told him to go without me. Stay out as late as you like. He is thrilled. My son is staying at grandma's house. I will have the entire house all to myself for the whole night! I am thrilled. Finally some serious alone time. I will finally get to make the 4 sundresses that are waiting to be put together, the new curtains for my room and organize my kitchen. OOPS. I digressed off topic. Sorry about that. I would be willing to set my own feelings aside for stuff like fishing (YUCK), camping (double YUCK), and things that involve the outdoors. Like I said as long as I am not asked to compromise my own moral and principles, I would do just about anything to make my husband happy.
1 person likes this
• United States
18 Jun 07
Well the thing about him going to the bar was he didn't have anyone else to really go with around here either. Most of his friends are back where we use to live which is over an hour from here depending on traffic. His brother is only 19 so he can't go to the bar with him either. I don't like bars for a different reason then most, and its not an issue that is his but mainly mine. I kept myself busy while there by playing pinball most of the night and having a few smokes. He's only 24 so he's still at that age where life is somewhat of a party lol. I know you remember that age too. Between the Carnival, dinner and the bar I think he had one of the greatest birthdays he's ever had and knowing that makes my few hours of irritability worth it all.
• United States
19 Jun 07
You did a great thing and in doing so you made my day. It really was a great gift of you and I am forever thankful. I know that you didn't really want to go and for you to put yourself aside for me is so wonderful. You know that if I could I'd give you the world. You are the greatest woman anyone could ask for and I'm thankful that you are mine.
1 person likes this
• India
19 Jun 07
first of all a very big 'HUG' to a person like you who does such sweet things just so your guy can have a good time and just to see him happy on his birthday.. i don't know but people don't do it so often not my boyfriend cos i hate celebrating my birthday.. secondly i have gone to a lot of effort just to give my man surprises and make him happy on his birthday.. and now he feels like almost every week it's his birthday cos i do so many good things for him cook his favorite food and buy him lovely novels now and then or a nice t-shirt that makes him look attractive.. Just so he feels that i care and that there is still the same love between us.. I had lit the whole room with candles and even decorated them with daisies and written his name on the floor with flowers on the day of his 35th birthday and when the lights were off it looked so wonderful so when he came home tired from work he was both shocked and speechless.........
@ebenjie (440)
• Philippines
19 Jun 07
start to love what he loves to do.but if your not comfortable what he loves to do,better find yourself.
1 person likes this
@butterfly39 (3907)
• Philippines
19 Jun 07
Well for special occasions only. I can give all his wants for as long as we'll not fight then it's just fine.
1 person likes this
@pendragon (3352)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I'm finding it difficult to pick one specific incident to cite, but every little thing I do,I try to go all out for her.There's one issue I feel i may have been too lenient with all along and i hope it's not too late to repair.I'm sorry you had to go to a bar, I hate them as well.
1 person likes this
@ememj12 (43)
• Philippines
18 Jun 07
Hi devilsangel! Hope you are fine! I've been there before. Individuals always seek for their happiness. Once in a while you should support the happiness that your partner wants. If you really love him/her support him/her to what he loves most. That's sacrifice.
1 person likes this
@lucky_witch (2711)
• Philippines
18 Jun 07
A long as I can make it and will not harm anybody. One of the things that I like doing is making my partner happy. I've been in a broken marriage with my first husband and this time with my partner I dont want to regret anything...so im giving my best shot! Fate is really tricky and with that there is nothing I can do but I guess Ican make my life worth living just before fate becomes tricky. I want to make everyday of our relationship meaningful and that will happen if I gave my best to make things work out for the two of us and make him happy.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jun 07
My husband wanted me to quit my job.i have medical problems(both knees have to be replaced).i didnt want to quit even though i was in pain.well my husband decided he would quit his job also.now he is sorry he did because his spending habits have broke us.so to make things worse he takes a job delivering daily newspapers.that doesnt pay anything because by the time you buy your own gas,plus the supplies and the fact that payday is only once a month does`nt make for a happy camper.
@navtech (1776)
• India
19 Jun 07
Hi, devilsangel, I will allow my partner to do anything on those special days. After all it is a life. We have to give lot of concession for our parter, wife and husband. It gives them happiness.
@rosie_123 (6118)
19 Jun 07
Well I think any relationship needs a bit of compromise, so I will do my best to make him happy, but I would never compromise myself for anyone – not even the man I love. I have done stuff like been to football (soccer) matches with him, which bores me stupid, and given up something I wanted to watch on TV for one of his precious football matches for example, but I would never drink or take anything I wasn’t comfortable with, or go to any place where I felt compromised. Relationships are all about give-and-take, - but he has to give the "giving" part too!
• India
19 Jun 07
I will do anthing to make her happy.
@archer1811 (1099)
• Philippines
19 Jun 07
Well i can go wherever my partner want me to go, and i am willing to sacrifice everything just to make him happy, BUT not in the way that the two of us wont ended up into a bitter situation, as i know my husband/partner so much for a long time and all he want for us is to have a better future i am willing to sacrifice everything for him that my family get a better benefit into it.
@saierchok (1294)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I would do anything for the one I love.. ANYTHING let her ask and I'll do whatever she wants..
@azimsay (545)
• India
18 Jun 07
I shall go far away up to get happyness in life.Happyness mines good health,good relationships,inof money ,not more but it is up to need.