She broek curfew now I am the bad mom.

these kids will realize the things you are trying to emphasize when they grow older and that's the sad part for them - realizing when it's already too late. i think you were just doing your duty as a caring mother. at her young age, it is a good practice to abide a simple rule and try not to break it. she will soon be an adult and will live her life on her own and she must embody a simple learning on how to follow simple directives. it will serve big purpose for her success in life. more so when she has her own family to bear.

You were not wrong because you were just protecting your child. If she were just hanging out with a bunch of girls, I would have said that you should have stopped and said something to her so she knew that you knew she was out, but not taken her with you...wait until she is home to instill punishment. The reason for this is because you let her stay at a friends home and obviously that friends parents have a different curfew for thier daughter. She was in their home under their rules at that time. You might want to investigate a bit more about this friend. If the parents let her wander the streets past 10pm and she is only 15, you may not want to let her stay over there anymore. I see this was posted a month ago, so I am betting it is way over.

no, you are not a bad mom at all... your daughter is only 15 and she is still underage... it is still your responsibility to take care of her and look after her safety... and you are right... you've got to have rules in your house... if she wants to stay in your house, then she has to follow your rules... i think 10 pm curfew is very generous for a 15 years old girl... i don't even have that privilege from my parents when i am 15... 9 is the maximum for me... don't worry too much... she will learn to appreciate you sooner or later as she gets older...take care...

Raising your daughter is your responsibility and you are doing the job the best you can and know how. You have rules and she must follow them as long as she is living under your roof. Sometimes you have to go to tough love mode but this too is for their own good. Your daughter will understand in the years to come! Hang in there and know this will pass. I've managed to get my youngest (twins) to age 20 now...yay! You still worry about them though, that never ends! Good luck!

You did the right thing. We just have to love our kids through this time of believing that all we want to do is make their life miserable. It is not easy doing the right thing and our kids learn that by watching us do it over and over again. She will realize it someday when she has her own kids.

Absolutely not! Kids, especially teenagers should be exposed to the right amount of discipline. It's going to be very hard for them to understand as it is hard for you to explain it to them. Also, go back to your teenage years, try to remember how you felt back then and how you wanted to be treated. This may help you balance your parenting worries and your child's desires. It's tough being a mom!

Absolutely not, you were absolutely within your boundaries. She should not have been out and definitely should not have been talking with a person on a motorcycle. I would have made her come home also.

Of course you're not a bad Mom. If only she watched CourtTV. They have shows where they need to find a murderer. And it's usually because he killed a girl who was out on her own, walking somewhere, talking on a payphone, or with a friend somewhere. Talking to a guy, getting a ride from a guy, anything that has to do with a guy. Besides she's just trying to make you feel guilty by saying you ruined her birthday. She's only saying that because she knows in her eyes that she got caught and now she's trying to make you feel guilty like you don't trust her. Just let her think what she wants you where the right one and if she still gives you attitude show her who's boss. And now you know that her friend is also disobedient.

Absolutely not! That's what a loving parent is suppose to do. The bad parents are the ones that don't know or care where their children are or what they are doing. You did good.

I wish I was allowed out until 10pm when I was 15. I was only just allowed to catch the bus to the shops with my friends at that age!

My children are still young, (age 7 and 9) so they don't go out on their own yet, but I have a set schedule for them and they stick to it for the most part. I've let them stay up past their bedtime for special events, and they always seem to think it's a real treat. I know it must be hard to reason with a teenager, but if you could somehow let your daughter know that rules are good for her, I think it might help her see things your way. Try to start out by saying that you didn't mean to embarrass her in front of her friends by making her come home (which WAS the right thing to do, by the way) but let her know that you've given her a curfew to protect her because you love her and it's your job to see to it that she is safe. If all else fails, she will come around and see things your way when she gets a little older. And that might be worth the wait!

nope, your house, your rules and yes, there are rules for a reason and she needs to realize they are for HER benefit... what we tell our daughters 10 & 14, we only have rules because we love you...if we didnt, we wouldnt care what you did!

I have a fifteen year old daughter so I can totally relate to the situation. Of course you did the right thing and she knows she can push your buttons to either make you feel bad or guilty or both. This is a tough age and stage and as I always say to my own daughter, "I know you won't like me, but that's okay, you'll get over it". She always does and even though she thinks I'm strict, she knows that I care about her and her brother and in the long run, it's for her own good because I have better judgment at my age now, then she has at her age.

Well I probably wouldn't have went out to her while she was out. I would just wait until she was either at her friends house or else she was at home. She could have thought you were spying on her or something. I remember when I was her age having a curfew at 9pm. Maybe if she has some good behavior or something, maybe consider raising her curvew to 1030??

not at all. She needs to know that you are the adult and you have rules that she has to follow until she is 18. I know me and my mom went through the same thing.

No, I don't think it was wrong. SHe's only 15 years old, girls this age don't understand the real dangers that are in this world, sure the guy on the mortorcycle could really have been harmless, but whose to say, that there wasn't someone else lurking around, waiting to get the girls alone? I don't want my children to grow up paranoid of course, but there really is no reason for a 15 year old to be out on the streets past that time. I would tell her, that she has proven that she cannot be trustworthy, that she has broken the trust that you had in her, and it will take being responsible on a consistent basis, in order to earn it back again. She didn't think she'd get caught, and taht's prob. why she's so upset. Also, I know when I was a kid, being busted by your mom, isn't really "cool" but in all reality, it doesn't matter if she thinks you are cool, only that she knows that you love her, and that she is respectful of the rules that you have laid down. I'm sure you'll have many other moments ahead of yourself. (;

Oh you will be hated for a while but she will get over it. You did the right thing by making it known that you will not tollerate rules being broken. They have a purpose and she will thank you later. My children tell me all the time how glad they are that I stuck by the rules and never let them get by with breaking them. They are all responsible adults now with children who are required to follow their parents rules. Times have changed and teens are no longer as safe as they think they are. It's just hard trying to get them to understand why we as parents have set these rules.

No you were not my youth is still fresh in my head and I wish I had a mom to look out for me as much as you do though I would not have liked it then I would surely have something else to thank her for now

You did the right thing. All 15 year olds should have "bad moms" at least once in awhile. Besides that fact it was after 10, you knew what was oing on in town better than she did so as a mother you had to do what you did to protect her. I think in the future though you should probably let her friends parrents know that she has a 10:00 pm curfew no matter where she is staying and that you expect them to respect that. Perhaps her friend had a later curfew and they thought only their rules applied since she was at their house.

No, I don't think you were wrong at all. Teen years are the toughest of all for both them and us parents. You have to set your rules and stick to them. I will add that would be hard for your daughter to say that she is unable to be out after a certain time when staying at the home of someone who has very different rules. Before my daughter is allowed to stay at a friend's house, i talk to the parent(s) and tell them of any rules that I really feel strongly about. Young girls wandering the streets at nite is one of them. It isn't so much the "time" but who they are with and what they are doing. Im sure if you ran into your daughter in the store with her friend and parents, you'd feel alot different.right? Anyway, after talking with the parents,I usually have an idea of whether it is a place that I want my daughter spending the nite at or not. Remember also, kids will sneak out. Did you discuss this with her friends parents? Maybe they were not aware that the girls were out and about. One other thing...I work nights. I can't tell you how many nites I came home to a group of teens in my house at midnite!! There parents had no idea where they were! The kids that i knew, I would call their parents and inform them what nites I worked. Those parents not only kept their kids away on those nites but would pop in to make sure others were not gathering here! Parents need to work together to keep our kids safe.