Takeing advantage of my generosity.
@scarfaceboston (869)
Romania
June 28, 2007 12:28pm CST
Hello everybody,
I'm a student in the second year now and I stay in a hostel.
It's great the life of a student but I have noticed that my room colleagues are starting to take advantage of my generosity.
The problem is like this: if we don't have or run out of something that we all use I tell the guys to all put money and buy it. But it's like know one is listening. So I'm staring to get mad and go and buy it. And after that I tell them that they can't use that things I just bought and if they wanted they should go and buy it. And they say I'm a bad person.
So any way you look at the problem in the end I end bad.
Does this happens to you?
Does people take advantage of your generosity?
And when you stay enough is enough?
Please share...
1 person likes this
8 responses
@madhang (28)
• India
28 Jun 07
I think you did just fine. I never liked it when people take advantage of me. I think, sometimes you should just let people suffer. Why should you bother to buy that stuff when your friends need that too? Telling tehm not to use those that you have bought.... that may only make you unpopular. Anyways, its just your friends so don't let that bother you. Next time they use the stuff, try reminding them that they did not bother to have that substance when you all needed it. Try not to make sound like an accusation. It just might help them realize their mistake.
Also make it clear that you don't like when your someone takes advantage of your good nature!
1 person likes this
@scarfaceboston (869)
• Romania
30 Jun 07
I did all of the things that you said but no response. They continued to act like before.
And there not my friends, there 3 people with how I have to shear a room.
Now when I buy something and we all need the only person who can use it is me.
Thank you for responding madlang and have a great day.
@Kythe42 (1412)
• United States
28 Jun 07
I think you were right in the way you acted. Those people are jerks if they are not willing to chip in for things that you all use. If if you are the one spending all of the money on the items, then you should keep them to yourself and not let anyone else use them. Don't let people take advantage of you. People who do that to you are not worth being friends with, so don't worry if they hate you for it.
1 person likes this
@scarfaceboston (869)
• Romania
28 Jun 07
I know. I'm not friends with them only room colleagues. That's it.
Thank you for responding and have a great day. ;)
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
29 Jun 07
well, you have to be really firm with the people who make use of your generosity... you did the right thing... if your friend do not want to chip in to buy the stuffs, then they can't use it... it is as simple as that... especially all of you are still students and are still using your parents' money... you have to explain that to your friends... if they get mad, then they are really not worth it to be your friends... may be you can find other room colleagues to share with... good luck...
1 person likes this
@jnallen_487 (800)
• United States
28 Jun 07
You did the right thing. People should learn that they can't take advantage of other people. If they don't like it, they know where the door is.
1 person likes this
@yuanchang (474)
• Philippines
28 Jun 07
well there are only two types of person in the world. one is the host and the other one is the parasite. but it is better yet to be the host than to be the parasite afterwards in my opinion. i do not want to be the parasite. i do not see myself as a user that satisfies himself on others account. it would be better if i see myself as the one being used.
i have been used a lot of times and it doesn't feel good in the end. some of my friends only sticks to me because they can gain advantage of something. some people who seldom talks to me suddenly talks to me just because they need something from me. anyways, always think that when anyone takes advantage of you, good karma awaits you.:)
1 person likes this
@scarfaceboston (869)
• Romania
28 Jun 07
I also don't like to be a parasite but I also don't like to be used.
Thank you for responding and have a great day. ;)
@sugarfloss (2139)
• Malaysia
29 Jun 07
hello scarfaceboston!I understand how you feel.I've stayed in a hostel before and I didn't quite enjoy it. Being a student is great,having friends is even better but having personal space is what you want/need most. I know how you feel about friends taking advantage. Try writing a note if they don't listen or just ignore them if you think they're not worth the hassle. either way,you'll graduate from college with or without them.goodluck!
1 person likes this
@anaknitatay (1335)
• Philippines
29 Jun 07
That's the problem with having roommates. There will always be people like that, people who take advantage of others or who depend on others to solve the problem. not willing to do their fair share or contribute and this is what makes the world a harder place to live in.
Oh, if it was just the other way around. People who give without being asked! :(
1 person likes this
@faeryprincess (17)
• United States
28 Jun 07
i'm one of those really nice people so i've definitely have been in your shoes. my advice is to not care if they start being jerks. if they only want you as a friend cuz you pay for everything, do you really want friends like that? just keep doing what you're doing and either they'll come around or you'll find real friends.
1 person likes this
