Are You Over-Protective?

We all have differant views on what we precieve as over protective, I have a boy of 9 and girl of 6 and if you where to ask my parents they would say I am over protective if you where to ask my girl frineds mother she would say we're not. I think it all depends on your up bringing and the area you live if your out in the country side you are more likely to allow your child to play out on the fields, if your in a city centre your not going to allow them to play out where there is a lot of strangers and tons of traffic, my son does go to his frineds house but we alway know where he is and who's house he is at

That does sound a little over-protective to me, but at the same time it's hard to judge other people's reasonings for such things! There are a lot of bad things that can happen to kids, and it is better to be as safe as possible. I think if anything the rule about always having a parent or grandparent present when at a friend's house is probably a little isolating and embaressing for them, but if they haven't shown too many problems with it then I guess it's working fine. I am pretty over-protective myself. My husband and I were both abused as kids, and we can't get over the idea that someone else could treat our kid that way. He is one year old, and has only been babysat for very short periods of time, by very trusted friends. My husband works nights and stays home with him while I work days, so that we won't have to use daycare. And no one in either of our families will ever be allowed to be in a room alone with him, no matter what.

I am definitely not over protective. I let my kids have a lot of freedom. They are 7, 5 1/2 and 4 1/2 (I also have a 15 month old) and they are allowed to play in our yard or on our front porch without me being there. I regularly leave them in the living room watching TV while I go do stuff in other parts of the house. They are allowed to make their own breakfasts (they can make cereal and are learning to use the toaster) and lunches (they can make many kind of sandwiches). They know how to use a microwave to warm food up. They know how to work the remotes so they can watch what they want and they know what is allowed and what isn't. I never hover over them. In fact we mostly do separate things. If they need me they come to me and we hang out. My oldest spends most of the summer next door at her best friend's house. I have no clue what they are doing there. Her friend's mother was my best friend growing up and I spent most of my summers at her house, too (or vice versa). I prefer them to have freedom and learn how to be responsible for that freedom, like my parents did with me.

well as a mother i am over-protective too. i am so careful on taking care of my baby. i also would not allow my son to go out without anyone to watch him. it is not abnormal to think the welfare of your beloved child. we all value them that is why we want them to be safe every time.

It's hard for me to judge another parent, but from my own personal experience as a parent, I believe that my kids need to see themselves as individuals and they also need to learn how to make decisions on their own without me hovering. I am a strict parent and we have rules in our home, and although I carefully monitored my children when they were younger, I also had to hold myself back from being too over-protective as I felt they needed to be able to develop a strong sense of themselves.

I should accept I always be over protective about my loved ones. Im always worried that they should be safe wherever they are. But recently, I found that being over protective actually troubles the loved ones. Because sometimes being protective, we should not poke the nose on their privacy. Everyone needs their privacy and protectiveness should not be a problem for them. So I have decided recently not be too protective. Everyone is worried about THEMSELF first , so I need not worry about them too much. But ensure that they are safe and comfortable always.

I'm also very protective. I think every child is different and every parent is different. So, I can't really tell you if you're being over-protective or not. I think it's great that you're home-schooling your kids. And you did mention that they have friends. I guess the trick is to be able to give them a balanced lifestyle and equal amounts of time with the family, friends, etc. If you're not comfortable with them going to a friend's house, maybe you can have their friends over. You can also sign them up for various hobbies or sports they can participate in where you can be there to monitor them and yet at the same time, they will be able to socialize with other kids. At the end of the day, it's all about how you decide to bring up your kids. My motto has always be "I'd rather be safe than sorry". So, I'm always cautious and if that is deemed being over-protective, then so be it.

Well my daughter is still just little so I consider myself to be really protective of her. And I am already freaking out about what I'm going to do when she is ready to start school. Part of me really wants to home school. But at the same time I don't want to shelter her. But what is the happy medium between sending your children to school afraid they are going to be shot or keeping them away from the world? I don't blame you on not letting your kids go anywhere alone without a parent or grandparent. I think they are too young for that right now. But I think if they are at a friends house whose parents you trust you should be able to leave them.

And I thought I was very overprotective. Not trying to be mean but yes that is going a little too far. But they are your children and you have the right to raise them anyway you want to. Tell your MIL to butt out! It's really none of her business how you raise your children.

I thought I was over-protective. I won't let my 3 kids 11, 8, and 6 be alone ever or just hang with other kids without an responsible adult present. Some parents dislike me because I think they are not resonsible enough to have my child there without me. We spend every day together and it is a rare sight to see me without all 3 childern with me. I know I am going to start to have to let them have more independence but they don't ask for it yet. My plan as a parent is to help my childern learn to be productive self sufficient members of society and I won't be able to do that without cutting the umbilical cord. You mother-in-law is probably seeing that yes you guys are doing things differently than most others families around, but if it works for you and what your goals are then go for it.