why do people get so defensive? ugh!
@angel_of_charm (4134)
Philippines
July 13, 2007 1:35am CST
i had been discussing somethings with my boyfriend this morning about what happen to me early this morning with a mice..when all of a sudden we end up talking about the past when he came home last year of april..
he didnt made so much time for me because he has to stay is a grandfather who was very ill..so i understand that all month his here i only got 2 days to share and spend with him..sometimes in the middle of conversation most of the time..when we are talking about what he miss here..he would open up and say things he went to and he had done during the time the garndfather was sick..with this conversation i suddenly said.."oh! seems like you had a nice vacation here" then he started getting defensive and stuff ..ugh! and i hate it so much when he does..because he will gonna turn back the blame on me even if its out of the question..
he is freaking me everytime..ahh..this man..he's giving me headache again..
1 person likes this
2 responses
@blackbriar (9076)
• United States
13 Jul 07
It could be insecurities, the way ppl take a comment wrong, many reasons why ppl can sometimes get defensive. It's a pain when that happens but that's life, unfortunately. Whenever someone gets defensive on me, I try to work it out instead of getting defensive back. Sometimes it works, other times it don't.
1 person likes this
@angel_of_charm (4134)
• Philippines
14 Jul 07
i guess you are right blackbriar..and i tell you this conversation had been a big issue now and we are fighting all over..makes me sad but i got my fault too..i tried to be defensive too..i wish i could have shut my big mouth..ugh!
@blackbriar (9076)
• United States
14 Jul 07
I can't count how many times I've opened my big mouth only to realize what I did and wish I could take it back just as quickly. Just got to learn to think b4 you act. Learned that in anger management classes. I learned a ton of stuff in those classes. Sure glad I decided it was time to finally take them.
@angel_of_charm (4134)
• Philippines
14 Jul 07
i learn that myself too..i really cant control my anger i admit that is my biggest problem..i alwyas talk so bad only to realize i shouldnt have said it..
@pilotjune1972 (199)
• Philippines
13 Jul 07
hi angel of charm sorry to hear that your boyfriends freaking you out :( just try to be patient with him. Maybe he's been through a lot so he just wants to blurt those things out. Its good that its you he's been sharing those hard or easy times, just try to listen. I'm not saying that you be a mum, just try to talk when you feel you need to. Ok. I hope it works out, goodluck! :)
1 person likes this
@angel_of_charm (4134)
• Philippines
13 Jul 07
ugh! he is freaking me out because everytime i get to say something about the past he is being defensive..about his sh1t relatives..and about what happened last year..last year was a mess for us thats why..whenever we get to talk about it he is being defensive because i was suspucious of his reasons and acts while he is here and spend 2 days with me for the whole month of his stay..and i tell you..my suspicions are somewhat true..he admitted some when i already caught him with his big mouth..today he suddenly opened up when he went to night clubs and comedy bars with his cousins that he never mentioned just now..i could catch him with his own words you know..he will spill it out when he carried away with the conversation ugh!..
