finding a whole new world

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it happens that when i can no longer cope up with my problems and worries, i tend to block them out of my mind and revolve myself in a world where i get to have whatever i want. of course, it doesn't change the fact that my dilemmas won't go away until i face and fight them off; my point is that even for just a little while, i get to find a whole new world where i can just relax and be happy. i am most obsessed with the prospect of forever experiencing blissful moments in my life; i cannot find those moments here in the reality world nowadays because everything seems to be so out of place. i feel completely baffled because comparing the fantasy world and reality world - they're so different! why can't the reality world be just how it should be like being able to have what is ought to be having. i hear people say that if life's all happiness, there'll be no more challenges and meaning in life - and we'll all forget God. then why can't God just take us all to heaven so we'll be able to see Him and think of Him? i am tired of wondering, tired of asking questions. i just want to be lost in my own world now, the world where i don't have to struggle and be oppressed by the cruelties in this world. perhaps, i can find this kind of world somewhere - but i am not sure where. in the beach, perhaps? i can always find peace and serenity in the beach especially when i watch the waves crash on the shore and feel the silent breeze on my bare skin.. but that's just me imagining again, right? if ever there's a dream where i can get to experience a "perfect day", i can probably close my eyes at night and feel contented enough to sleep forever. ü