torn between success in career or in motherhood

Philippines
July 14, 2007 12:10pm CST
Some people are not meant to succeed in both. Can one actually succed in both? I like to blossom in my nursing career but I chose to stop working because I want to be a full time wife and mom and take care of my family. I do not want to miss the milestones of my daughter and I want to be there to comfort her when she is hurt. My toddler smile just makes my worries and doubts melt away and assures me that I have made the right choice. How do working women succeed in both? I raise my hands and salute them for doing a job well done.
2 people like this
8 responses
@piggyxoxo (169)
• Canada
14 Jul 07
i think that balance is the key to life. my take on it is to prioritize what is the most important to you. women can have it all nowadays. a career and a family and be successful at both. it will be hard though. my mom had a full-time career but she hired nannys to take care of me and my sisters. i dont remember my mom teaching me how to read and write. i have learned from this and i will not make the same mistake. for me, i think that i will only work part-time until my baby enters grade one. motherhood is the greatest experience and i will not pass it up even if it means putting my career on hold. but you know what they say, if there is will there is a way. i plan to have both, it is just a matter of maybe pursuing the career in a different manner. wish you all the best!
• Philippines
14 Jul 07
thanks! some people really have the skill to have everything in balance. I guess if you really want something you should really work hard to get it. priorities really play a role in making decisions in our lives. it's nice to know that i am not alone in this dilemma. thank you all for sharing :)
@latsmom (824)
14 Jul 07
Ihave a few freinds who have managed to do both but all have said that they feel they have missed out on some milestones but prefer to work so that their children can have the best of everything. I don't work at the moment due to ill health but love spending time with my daughter, and watching her growing up. I have so much admiration for those that manage to do both, especially single moms and dads, but I have to say for me I feel until my daughter is older that looking after her at home is the best option for me.
• Philippines
14 Jul 07
I also admire the strength and courage of single mom and dads. They really do sacrifice a lot for their children and are epitomes of good parents and good providers. I believe that staying at home with our kids will also give them the best of everything that parenting has to offer. It really depends on how you look at the situation. Every thought has its pros and cons.
@lexus54 (3576)
• Singapore
15 Jul 07
It's a tough act juggling between career and motherhood, and if I may include also, being a good wife and being an effective homemaker as well. That's why many women in today's society choose to marry later. They'd rather concentrate on building up their career first before settling down, because they know that to gain success in their careers and (for some) climb up the corporate ladder, demands long hours at work. It also depends on the type of work you do (nature of work, what position you will hold) and how ambitious you are in establishing your career. You will certainly need to balance between the two if you already have children to take care of. I think for those who are successful at both, they are willing to work their guts out and also make sacrifices in terms of giving up time for other pursuits. You will have to ask yourself if you are also willing to make such sacrifices.
@Gemmygirl1 (2870)
• Australia
15 Jul 07
I have never had a career so it's a little 1 sided for me but i think even i i'd had one, i still would have gone with being a stay at home mum! I'm sure you could have both & some people choose to have their families later on so they can have a fulfilling career with a family later on. Others will work while being a parent & some will have their children first & have a career once the kids are a little older! I think it's different for all & if someone can manage both then i take my hat off to them. For me, being a stay at home mum is what i wanted to do & my partner is the sole income earner - which he is happy to do. I get a support payment from the government which helps out & we never really have any money worries so i think we chose the right path!
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
15 Jul 07
when we decided to start a family, me staying home, was what made sense. I think that's it's the greatest job in the world! I don't know how mothers do it who work. I know most mothers who work, don't really have a choice, as they need the money to survive.. And those of us who decide to stay home, make many many sacrifices in order to do it, not only financially, but socially as well. I think that it must be very difficult to maintian a balance between work and family, for working mothers.. and I'm sure they miss out on some things. If life were fair, every mother would have that choice to make of their own, but as we all know, it just doesn't work out that way. I feel for those who must work, and don't want to. And I know that I am very blessed to be able to stay home with my boys.
@dfollin (14494)
• United States
14 Jul 07
I was asingle mom when I was younger of two boys.Then I had no desire to have a career.Therefore I worked whatever job I could get.Then I got married and haad a daughter.Iam partially handicapped and I was a stay at home mom.My husband got ill and could not work.With my handicaps I was limited as to what work I could get.Then he got worse and I had to stay home and care for him.He passed away and now Iam a partially handicapped widow and single parent again wishing I had learned a career when I was younger.Now,it is more possible to find jobs in companies where you work homebased or if you have the line of work where it is possible, you could start your own business.While you work from home,you can be with your children and work during their nap and at night when they go to bed.If with your line of work that is not possible.Then you could hire a part time home helper that can watch your child/children while you work.
• New Zealand
14 Jul 07
Hi im a working mum and thankyou for the praise. I use this as my rule for when im with my baby its not amount of time but the quality of time that is important. So when im with my child i give it my all and make quality time with alot of hugs etc and reading and playing with her.
@florena2 (70)
• Romania
14 Jul 07
I have other opinion. I like to be a mother but i can`t stay away from work. I don`t like to live on my husband money, if I like a dress i buy it I don`t think what aill he say. And i belive I can do both.