what age should toilet training begin at?

@babykay (2133)
Ireland
July 17, 2007 2:12pm CST
I have a 15 month old, I am not interested in toilet training him yet as he doesn't seem ready. But I am asking because, today I was at a friend's house. Her boy is 3 years 9 months old, nearly 4 years. He had a nappy on! Is it normal for children this age to not be trained completely? Any opinions welcome.
7 people like this
23 responses
@foxyfire33 (10007)
• United States
17 Jul 07
I would guess that the average age for potty training is 3 but boys do tend to be harder sometimes. My older three trained right around three years but my fourth still isn't completely even though we've been trying for two years. He is now 4 years and 4 months old and has no developmental delays of problems. He just won't use the potty.
3 people like this
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
19 Jul 07
typical man!
@lattiee (64)
• United States
17 Jul 07
It can take right around as long as 5 yrs for a boy to be potty trained some can be ready sooner just like some take much more longer they say even in video's don't force them to potty train or there will be alot of accident.
3 people like this
@megs85 (3144)
• Australia
17 Jul 07
My son is fourteen months old and definitely not ready to be toilet trained either... I figure once they can verbalise the need to go to the toilet and are confident enough with walking, and other coordination it is time to try. One of my nephews is almost 4 and he hasn't had a nappy on since before he turned three, however he still occassionally has accidents particularly during the night. I think anything is normal. All children are different and develop differently. I think that by 4- 4 1/2 most accidents should have stopped, but again this is flexible. I don't think anything is set in concrete. My fourteen month old is my first child, so I haven't really had any experience with this all and anything I say is strictly my own thoughts and opinions. Your friends son will get there... do you know if he has been trained at all? Perhaps she still leaves a nappy on her son when he is napping or something?
@Ravenladyj (22920)
• United States
17 Jul 07
OMG no no I am sorry but I have serious issues with that to be perfectly honest with you...There is IMO NO REASON for a child that age to still be in diapers..thats just ridiculous as far as I'm concerned....Do you have any idea WHY the parents are allowing it? Could it be a medical thing maybe or do you think they just cant be bothered or wht? If its not medical...than thats just insane IMO..not to mention damaging...
2 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22920)
• United States
17 Jul 07
I forgot to mention when my kids trained...both my kids were potty trained before they hit 3 yrs old....
2 people like this
• United States
17 Jul 07
my daughter now 9 years old, wasn't ready for potty training at ages 2, 3, but at age 4 we started potty training and by her 5th birthday she was fully night and day potty trained. She is my only daughter I have 2 boys who are older than she. My oldest son was potty trained between myself and his fathers mother by age 3 1/2 (he's now almost 17) and my other son was potty trained by age 3 his father was pushing it to get him into preschool but he really wasnt ready. Looking back on it I wish I'd waited til he was ready (he's now 15). Out of my 3 children my 15 year old is the only one who had accidents at night and he's slowly outgrowing that problem. Anyway each child is different. Its best if the child is fully ready and pushing it does no good. Wishing you all the luck in this.
2 people like this
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
19 Jul 07
thanks for this. I am not looking forward to it!
• United States
18 Jul 07
Mine was fully day-time potty trained by the age of three years. I think she was already potty trained way before that, too. However, we are still training her for the night time. Last night was the first time she went without a diaper at night. She was able to sleep for four full hours without wetting the bed. That was a big accomplishment, considering she is only 3 1/2 years old. I guess it just depends on the individual child's development. Not every child is ready to be potty trained. And, some moms just prefer the convenience of putting their kids in diapers instead of cleaning up messes. And, others don't follow up with their little kids consistently to make sure that the child goes to the bathroom at least once an hour. Even to this day, I am constantly reminding my daughter to go to the bathroom. Most times she goes on her on and is fully independent in that arena. But, being so young, it never hurts to give them a little extra help. When you decide to potty train your child, you may find that he prefers the big person toilet and not his little boy potty. My little girl was that way. We struggled for awhile to get her to accept the little potty, but she never liked it. However, she was just delighted to use the big toilet. Some kids are that way. Best of luck potty training your little one. When the time comes, he'll let you know that he is ready.
2 people like this
@vicki2876 (5640)
• Canada
18 Jul 07
My daughter was 2 and a half when she was toilet trained for daytime even if we were out of the home. Only took her a couple times on the potty for her to catch on to what I wanted her to do and she was daytime trained. But took her another year to go overnight. So about 3 and a half completely. My middle child was 2 when I started but it took about 6 months for him to catch on to going to the toilet during the day. There was a lot of encouragement rewards dances etc to try to teach him. It was real hard! He is special needs and it takes him a bit longer to learn new skills. He still has challenges overnight and he is 8 and still may wet the bed sometimes. My youngest was completely trained day and night by his second birthday. He basically taught himself too. The potty was there from my older son and he just started going on his own without any effort on my part. Basically no two child are alike and you should start training when you feel they are ready. Vicki
2 people like this
@maddysmommy (16232)
• United States
18 Jul 07
Every child is different and some are harder to potty trains than others, especially boys. I started training my son as soon as he hit 3. It took a while though and eventually he got the hang of it. Now that he is almost five he still has a little trouble with wiping his bottom but he can do it on his own, he just gets a little picky at times and says he can't reach LOL he's just lazy i think LOL
@Dolcerina (3378)
• Hungary
18 Jul 07
Children are very different. We should not worry about them if one does it, still the other does not. If a children is healthy the parents should not worry about the quicness of learning. Look, one of my best friend's 3rd son is alredy 4 yrs old. And till now he has not said one word yet! He is a normal boy, (like his brothers who began to speak in "normal age) For him it is the time now to try to say his first words :) Anyway, my friend did not worried about him so much. I think parents are worrying only with the first child.
2 people like this
@AdamMax (260)
• United States
17 Jul 07
They should at least be 12.
1 person likes this
@foxyfire33 (10007)
• United States
17 Jul 07
There is no reason to give smart-aleck answers just to post.
1 person likes this
@foxyfire33 (10007)
• United States
18 Jul 07
Ah, that's a possibility. I hadn't thought of 12 MONTHS. Guess I was crankier than I realized today!
2 people like this
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
19 Jul 07
surely even 12 months is a bit young.
@jolanda33 (720)
• Netherlands
29 Jul 07
i think it depense on the child! when my daughter was about two years she wanted to go on the "big"toilet! sometimes she did something, but most of the times she was just sitting there! right now she is almost 3 years and i just started two weeks ago to leave the diaper of! the first day she did it in her pants 3 times, the next day 2 times and right now she doesn't realy do it in her pants anymore! sometimes she is too buzy playing so she forget to go, but she knows what to do on the toilet! during the nights she is dry too, but i use a diaper untill she is realy dry every day!
1 person likes this
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
30 Jul 07
So she decided herself to use the big toilet? What an independent lady.
1 person likes this
• Netherlands
30 Jul 07
yes, even in the morning when she still wears her diaper she wants to go to the toilet!so the diaper stays dry! and not with the special kidschair, no just the big toilet!
1 person likes this
@us2owls (1681)
• United States
18 Jul 07
I had 3 daughters - they were all potty trained well before they were 2. I would put them on the potty and pretend I was going too. My youngest one was trained from wetting her pants but it took quite a bit longer to train her to have a BM in the potty - but she got there and was fully trained by 2. They were never really a problem either with bed wetting after the potty training started. When people have kids 4 years old and still in diapers it is IMO laziness on the parents part unless there is a medical reason.
@Carrie26 (1587)
• United States
19 Jul 07
I dont consider parents lazy just because their child is not potty trained by age 2.Everybody expects people to have their children potty trained by 2 or they are lazy.I havebeen working with my son since 2 and a half and he still sits on the toilet but doesnt do anything.Like some people have said he will do it when he is ready and I will keep working with him.But people shouldnt call parents lazy unless you know the facts.So I guess you call a parent lazy if they have been working with thier child since they werer 2 and a half years old potty training and the child doesnt do anything in the potty?
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
22 Jul 07
there are always judgemental people. But I have heard of parents who are just too lazy to toilet train their kids.
1 person likes this
@sweetdesign (5151)
• United States
18 Jul 07
I started my daughter (now 17) when she was 16 months old but soon realized she wasn't ready so I stopped and about two months later she was ready and about 2 months after that completely trained. Each child varies in how soon they are ready for potty training and how long it takes them to complete training. However I feel it is a bit much to have an almost 4 year old still in diapers. I can see him in pullups at night (it takes longer for night control especially for boys) but in a diaper in the daytime?! Of course if there were an underlying medical reason whether physical or mental then I could understand but for a healthy almost 4 year old to not be toilet trained atleast in the daytime is a bit much.
1 person likes this
• United States
18 Jul 07
Oh and my daughter never had a nighttime problem. I always made sure she went before going to bed and limited water an hour before bedtime and she never had a problem. But that is the hardest part for children is overnight dryness. I can see having a boy in pullups at night even till almost 5 but he should be trained for daytime well before that age barring any medical reasons.
1 person likes this
• United States
18 Jul 07
I think you should start to potty train a child around the age of two or when they wake up in the moring with a dry diaper on. That is the advice I got.
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
19 Jul 07
and did this work well for you?
• Malaysia
6 Aug 07
actually it depend on readiness of the child. usually the age of toilet ranges 2-4 in typical children. but it can be earlier or later. however, often the child is physically ready but the parent is not. as a parent, we must not be afraid to explore our child physical and emotional readiness.you must commit yourself to do what has to be done on consistent basis.
1 person likes this
@selina0625 (1383)
• Philippines
5 Aug 07
Nate - My one year old boy.
That's also my concern. My son is just 1 year and 2 months old, is he still too young to be trained or are there some cases wherein kid this age have been potty trained wand was successful with it? I'm actually excited to buy his first potty trainer.
• Indonesia
30 Jul 07
Hi, I have a 10 1/2 months old boy. And I have trained him to poop since he was about 3 months. Though till now he still cant say or give sign for it, but every morning I always take him to toilet to poop and sometimes to pee. I can say he so seldom poop on his diapers or pants. I am happy to do so. It makes my work easier. You can try that/ Good luck
1 person likes this
@34momma (13891)
• United States
20 Jul 07
i think that is a bit to old to still be wearing diapers. my little girl is two and she has been trained now for about three months. i think about 2 is a good time to start potty training your child
@imadriscoll (2230)
• United States
19 Jul 07
I would say that if the child is old enough to drive, but isn't potty trained that you shouldn't let them have the keys!! LOL. I really think that we put a lot of pressure on children to do things that they might not be developmentally ready for ... I have read some books that say that some children are 5 before they develop the sensation that will wake them up to tell them they have to go to the potty. I have a four year old, who was potty trained at age 3. I have a two year old who sometimes goes on the potty and other times doesn't... she certainly doesn't poo on the potty. I have an 18 month old that I haven't even dreamt of starting to potty train and another baby on the way. I certainly don't want to have 3 in diapers (though we did it once before) but I don't think putting heaps of pressure on a child to go on the toilet really accomplishes anything but frustration for the parents and the child.
1 person likes this
@caraj444 (1080)
• Canada
18 Jul 07
i think somewhere between 2 and 3 years is a good time to start, until then they dont have any control over there bladder so you can train yourself to carry your child to the potty every 5 minutes but your not actually training your child, and i think its always easier if you start in the summer when they can have less clothes in the way when they really have to go. i also agree with the first person who posted that pull ups get in the way of potty training because there not actually feeling whats going on, if you use actually panties or underwear then they feel that its uncomfortable and are more likely to start using the potty because they dont want to sit in there own pee. i found with both my children they pretty much let me no when it was time to start because they would start taking there diaper off as soon as it was dirty and they both starting doing it around 2 years so we just went with it and by 3 my daughter was completely daytime trained and my son is just over 2 now and its hit or miss whether he makes it on time but hes trying so we just go with it