What is the role of a wife?

United States
July 25, 2007 2:44pm CST
That question probably sounds very old-fashioned... at least it does to me. When I think of a "wife's role," images spring to mind of 1950s housewives flitting around in frilly aprons, amidst baking a casserole, polishing the furniture and running the husband's bath water. The thing is, I have noticed that even in today's advanced societies (in other words, after women's lib), there still seems to be an expectation in societies around the world for a wife to fit a certain "role." I am just wondering what you ladies think of that; do you feel pressured to fit a certain "wifely role" or perform certain "wifely duties?" What happens when you buck tradition and decide you just won't? Do you feel that we are -- in some ways -- still stereotyped or expected to act a certain way as wives??
2 people like this
14 responses
• United States
25 Jul 07
The role of a wife is to be the partner, friend and equal to her husband and vice versa. That is the only constant in any marriage. Everything else is personal choice and opinion.
• United States
25 Jul 07
this is my favorite answer so far of the ones ive read. i TOTALLY agree with you. The wifely role is to be a partner, friend, lover and equal. housework, raising kids, laundry and everything else like you said depends upon the relationship and each's personal opinion and choice. Personally, if the wifely roles is to do the housework, the cooking cleaning washing clothes and take care of the kids and the husbandly duties make the money and thats it... then im the worst wife on the face of the planet because even though i do work from home, I do not do ALL of the cooking... or ALL of the cleaning... my husband does some as well! I think every marriage is different as far as each others "roles" or "duties". JMO
@mkirby624 (1598)
• United States
27 Jul 07
The roles of wives are as follows: Love your husband Respect your husband Be your husband shoulder to cry on Be your husband's emotional therapists Be your husband's biggest fan Be your husband's best friend. Not your husband's cook. Not your husband's maid. I love to cook for my husband. I don't mind washing his clothes, and cleaning up after the both of us. But he doesn't EXPECT it from me. If he DID expect it, I would not want to do it as much.
• India
26 Jul 07
i think wives shud be treated as a friend...if we really know the definition of a friend and treat our wife like a friend.....then no marriage wil be unsuccessful.
@34momma (13882)
• United States
26 Jul 07
i think that it is important that everyone in the house know their role. the role of the wife is to take care her family. now that means different things to different people. but what ever your role is you and your partner or husband should sit down and talk about who is going to be responsible for what
@nopain (32)
• China
26 Jul 07
Actually,i am a man ,but i take more care about my wife,because ,in my apinion, the role of a wife is the person who you take care about more,the thing you having in common,etc. when i having completed my work and back to home ,my wife always give me a kindly greeting,you know,as you work all day long,everyone will feel a little tired.the mind thing he want get is the word " i love you" or " how are you today?" which spoken from his partner .you know,when i heard some words such like that,i will all of things i do is worth of that.
@mindyja25 (180)
• United States
26 Jul 07
Well I have only been a wife for a short time. Just a month ago I was married to my love but we don't live together. I know it sounds funny but he's in the military and he is getting ready for deployment so he has been sent to another state. In fact we havn't lived together for a year because of the military. He lives over 1500 miles away. It sucks bad, but we make it work. So my role as a wife is to care for myself and our son. Right now that's all I can do he comes home every three months or so for a few weeks and then he is off to work again. He will be deployed soon for 15 months then after that we can live together.
@MGarcia (330)
• United States
26 Jul 07
Although a lot of women now work and help financially support the house hold. I do feel that the wife still has things she should try her best to do. Like the man of the house still does the fixing things, yard work. etc Now, a lot of times (like me) the woman also does some of the fixing things, and yard work as well. In this case I think everything should be 50/50. It all boils down to the couple, what they prefer - how each of them work best together.
@sbeauty (5865)
• United States
26 Jul 07
Women have a lot more freedom than they had in times past, but they are still locked into a lot of roles just by the pressure of society. It's even worse than in the June Cleaver days, because now women are expected to have full-time jobs to help make ends meet as well as do all the jobs related to motherhood and being a wife. Although some men are starting to understand and help a little, the burden of caring for children and a home is women's work, and most men conveniently ignore the burden all of this places on their wives. Women have added many roles, but they still haven't been allowed to forego any of the other expectations.
@vanities (11395)
• Davao, Philippines
26 Jul 07
for me i have to base this wifely duties to the bible itself ..that is if the couple is religious but if not then maybe the two must agree on something or terms as they live together..it is inherent for the wives to serve his husband according to what her heart tells her to do so..for me its not and obligation but an act of love likewise with the husband in return...all is equal here...
@ky1119 (698)
• United States
25 Jul 07
I try to be wifely. I work about 55 miles from my home, so on top of being at work 8-10 hours a day, I also have an hour commute there and an hour commute back. On the days that I am off of work, I do cook dinner, do laundry and clean the house. On the days that I do work, my husband does those things and has dinner ready when I get here. I support my husband very much in the things he has going on in his life, and try to be the best wife and mother I can be with the limited time that I sometimes have.
• Armed Forces Canada, Europe, Middle East
25 Jul 07
I do what feels right to me. I support my husband and take as good care of my daughter as possible. I like having dinner on the table when he comes home from work and keeping the house clean (although he helps sometimes). I think being a wife really depends on your relationship with your spouse and what your beliefs are. I don't think every woman would like the same things. There are women who work and are still great wives and mothers, its all about what you are comfortable with.
• United States
26 Jul 07
I think the role of a wife is whatever works for you. As a couple you have to work out who is/does what. Some men are better at those "traditional" roles such as cooking. Some women are better at making money. As long as both are happy - it is good! Being partners on the same page seems to be the most important.
• United States
25 Jul 07
I'm a stay at home wife and mom so I expet myself to do alot of things but I expect help from my husband, I'll run his bath water but I expect the same from him, I cook alot of dinners but so does he and I don't do all of the cleaning, I support my husband in almost everything he chooses to do and I expect the same support back. I also sew and crochet and what not but I'm not a sterotypical house wife. people expect me to be a certian way. I'm have naturaly blonde hair and I dye it dark red and everyone expected me to be blonde again. I have a lip ring and I'm not taking it out anytime soon and theres no way I'm going to stop getting tattoos just because I'm a mom and wife.
• India
25 Jul 07
No one can explain wife's role. She is having very equal role to our Mom. After Mom she is only person who take care you and your family. She is one who will take you to the different life. Ofcourse this is not applicable for all!!!!!