Say something nice you don't mean to or say nothing at all?

My husband is the sensitive type yet, he will still ask me "How does this look?" or "Do you think that I am gaining weight?" Silly boy, he should know by now that if you do not want to know what I think, do not ask me. If you are looking for reassurances or platitudes, why not just ask for them? I'll do it. I'll say to my husband "Please give me a compliment, my hair is a mess today" or "I'm feeling insecure today, tell me I'm gorgeous." I don't like it when people ask me questions having already decided what the "right" or "nice" answer should be. It's like you're looking to cast the bad guy in your script and -oops!- lucky me! I get to play the part of the wicked witch just for telling the truth according to how I see it! This is why I love mylot. I would never dream of cheapening my experience here by only looking for "nice" responses or by only giving them. This is one of the greatest challenges of human communication: how to agree to disagree. If you are only saying what you think that I want to hear, where is the stimulation? Controversy provokes thinking and introspection. Present your ideas, debate your opinions. Hold up a mirror, a filter, a prism. Show me a different way of looking at things, please. Don't be afraid. This is a FORUM, for pete's sake! If you can't say it here, where can you say it. And just think, you might just make a penny or two! :-)

I would rather stay quiet than say something that I don’t even mean. No matter how much I would like to fake flattery, I really can’t. In women’s clothing for example, when I see an officemate wearing something that does not really look good on them, I would not comment on it. But other girls would say that it looks nice and really flatter the officemate without really meaning it. I think this is worse than saying to the person straight out that her clothing is ugly. Here in mylot, I would only comment or respond to those discussions that interests me. I don’t care if the topic is hot or not.

i try and always be nice no matter what, i cant stand being nasty to others, if someone asked (in real life) does this look good and i dont really like it i will say yeah look fine. (fine to wear but i dont like it) but i wouldnt say that. but if something on mylot etc and i dont agree i just wont respond.

If I can't say something nice or at least neutral, I won't say anything at all, not even for the earnings. I truly believe that saying about how if we have nothing nice to say, then don't say anything at all. Why pick fights, just because you can? I try to ignore that because I just have too much to do to waste my time picking fights.

I totally believe in 'honesty is the best policy" and I'd rather be honest than lie and be nice just to be nice. If I have nothing nice to say I try to keep my mouth shut but I'm not good at that either. I'm not so great at using tact either. It's sorta ridiculous. but I mean...i'm not a rude horrible person.. I just think being nice and not meaning it is pointless.