I need advice on how to deal with my short-temperedness...
By lingli_78
@lingli_78 (12821)
Australia
July 29, 2007 6:15am CST
i realise that i can easily get angry or agitated over small things and i can't control myself... i just blow up whenever i feel that something is not right or not up to my expectation... and because of my short-temperedness, i often have a big fight with my hubby which is a waste of time, money and energy... i don't know how to control it... and everytime after the incident happen, then i will regret it... it shouldn't be like that... well, i realise because i am a perfectsionist as well whereas my hubby is a happy-go-lucky person which do not care about details... anybody here also experience the same thing like me??? can anybody please give me an advice to get rid of my short-temperedness... thanks in advance for responding...
4 responses
@classy56 (2880)
• United States
29 Jul 07
wow you sound like me..But i have learned that i cannot change things.So to keep my temper an blood pressure down lol...i just walk away an tell myself take time out.An i tell myself that im not perfect also "even if i think i am"..I find that laughing at stuff is more easier to get ride of anger.so try laughing at your hubby or other things more often..it really works.
@lingli_78 (12821)
• Australia
29 Jul 07
thanks for responding and giving me nice input... yes, staying away and having a time-out when i feel like blowing up is definitely a good idea... and smiling is certainly worth trying... the problem is, i can hardly force myself to smile when i'm not in a good mood... but i will certainly give it a try... thanks again for the suggestions...
@lingli_78 (12821)
• Australia
29 Jul 07
thanks for responding and your great advice... yes... i agree with you... nobody is 100% alike and we just have to learn to accept other people's differences... i am still trying to do that... i am learning day by day... thanks again...
@shakeroo (3986)
• Malaysia
30 Jul 07
Someone once told me if you are about to get angry, take a deep breath and count up to 10. That would give the part of your brain that controls the emotion time to get the signal form the part of your brain that controls reasoning. If the emotional brain gets the right signal, you would be able to handle your temper much better. I tried that and it really works.
@ryanphil01 (4182)
• Philippines
29 Jul 07
There's a saying. "It's not your problems that matter, it's how you deal with your problems that makes all the difference!"
Positive attitude towards life is the best cure for your problem on short-temperedness. The second that you accept that you "don't have control" over your temper, then that's already half the battle lost.
Try to follow these things to help yourself.
Every morning, think of all the good things in your life, and whenever you start feeling angry with something/someone, start thinking of all the good things you have in your life.
You need to realise that dealing with your problems/challenges with anger will in most cases, get you a far worse result than that of someone that deals with their problems in a more calm and relaxed manner. You need to remind yourself of this every day.
If you find that you are getting into a bad/depressed mood, then simply do something that you enjoy, be it eating something you like, phoning someone that you know can put a smile on your face, draw a picture, go for a drive, anything that makes you personally in a better mood.
Every day is golden, so spending your time being sad or depressed is not what you should be doing... You should either be happy, or dealing with the problem/challenge in the appropriate way so that you will be able to sort your problem/challenge out, and be happy.
Source: http://www.uncommonforum.com/viewtopic.php?t=20167&highlight
