Pending Friends Request

Australia
July 30, 2007 9:50pm CST
When you try to add a friend to your friends list it goes to the pending friends request until they approve. I was just looking at mine and I have quite a few that have been there for about 2 months now. If they didn't want to add me as a friend, I would think that they would just deny it. I know they have logged on recently as well, so it's not like they haven't been on again. Do you or have you had this happen? If so what did you do? Did you just delete them after a while or have you just left them?
6 people like this
12 responses
@raijin (10345)
• Philippines
31 Jul 07
I have some of them, during my first days here 8 months ago. I give a certain timeframe for that request also, especially to those active members here whom already I have come across with. But if they don't approve it, I wouldn't insist and then withdraw them. I'd think that they may not be interested at all, so I just look for others who would be more friendly to add me on their lists..
@raijin (10345)
• Philippines
31 Jul 07
There are lots of reasons why some just let them hang on the pending friend's list, that maybe they are too shy to deny you. With some still looking for a "good" reason to add you, a discussion that would interest them maybe(?). Lots of reasons, we just have to be the one to adjust and understand some of them!;)
3 people like this
• Australia
31 Jul 07
Yes, your probably right. I guess I just see it as, if they deny me then it is over and done with. Thanks!
• Australia
31 Jul 07
I think I will just delete them, it doesn't bother me if they want to deny me because that is their choice. I won't ask them again either because that will be just a waste of time. I am happy with the friends I have, I just don't understand why they would leave it though. If they don't want to, then they should just press the deny button and be done with it. Thanks!
1 person likes this
@carlaabt (3504)
• United States
31 Jul 07
I've never really paid any attention. I don't request friends very often, though. I have to admit, I'm bad sometimes about getting back to people when they request me. I have two people that keep asking, and I was denying them over and over, but now I just leave them as a request. So since I always have a number up there, I don't necessarily notice when I have a new friend's request. I do try to check at least once a week, though. Just to make sure I don't leave someone just hanging.
2 people like this
• Australia
31 Jul 07
I am the opposite, if I see that I have a friends request, I find that is the first thing I check. I just love seeing who it is and where they are from. Thanks!
1 person likes this
@lpetges (3036)
• United States
31 Jul 07
a also have about 9 pending on my list right now... i just havent had time to look them over. i think i need to go through and delete some of them. they are not even active it seems. i try always to respond if i can to my friends discussons as much as possible. it looks like some of my friend requests have no interest other than to be added on their friend list. i don't know if they are just trying to get thousands because it makes them feel popular, or if they truly intend on resonding and being a friend!
1 person likes this
@lpetges (3036)
• United States
31 Jul 07
yes vacations in the summer make it hard to keep going, and we are so busy right now, but i always check in when i get back--its fun to see who is still on.
1 person likes this
• Australia
31 Jul 07
Yes, I agree. Unfortunately I think there are a few on my friends list that no longer come on, but I am glad that I have still got plenty of other friends that do. Thanks!
• Australia
31 Jul 07
I try to respond to all my friends ones too, but sometimes I find it hard and there are times when I can't be on the computer for a couple of days. I know what you mean though, there are some people that never respond to their friends discussion and it does make you wonder. Thanks!
@juliefaye (1214)
• Philippines
31 Jul 07
I delete it. But before doing that i go to his profile if he does'nt log in for quite a time giving the reason that my request had not yet seen. If i requested it for a week and the user logged in for less than i week, i automatically delete my request. It clearly shows that he does'nt want to be my friend.
2 people like this
• Australia
31 Jul 07
I will probably delete them too. I think I have waited long enough. I have checked and they have logged in recently and they still haven't so I will just delete them. Thanks!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
31 Jul 07
same here. I have around 45 pending friends request...
1 person likes this
• Australia
31 Jul 07
I didn't have that many and I have deleted some now because they had long enough to choose if they wanted to or not. How long have you waited for them to approve or deny on some of yours? Thanks!
• China
31 Jul 07
i have no idea i am a fresh man if i had your problems i think i will make them know that i want to add them
• Australia
31 Jul 07
I can't send them a message because they are not on my friend's list. On this site, the only way you can send a message to someone else is if they are on your friends list. I am sure they would know anyway because they would see a number next to friends. I am not really worried about it though, I just think it makes sense that if they don't want me as a friend to just deny it, then it is over and done with. By the way, welcome to mylot. Thanks!
@Asylum (47893)
• Manchester, England
19 Apr 08
I would simply delete the request. As you have said they would have accepted the request a while ago if they were going to do so. There are no doubt many members who do not check the Friends page, so some of them may not even be aware that you have made the request.
@cefaz_21 (2596)
• Philippines
31 Jul 07
Haven't check mine lately, I have requested one that has been pending for at least a month I waited cause I don't see her often so i thought she haven't seen it yet and true when she logged in I notice she accepted me. For me,t if it's there for 3 months and they knew my requests..hmnn,maybe I'll think of cancelling the request,If they don't like it..so be it.I'll look for other friends who's willing to accept me
1 person likes this
• Australia
31 Jul 07
Yes, some of the ones that were there for 2 months, I had seen that they had logged in recently. I have deleted those ones now. I don't mind if they don't want me on their friends list, I just wish they would deny it though. Maybe they will feel bad if they do that, but it is better than just leaving it. Thanks!
@kayrod2 (1304)
• Australia
31 Jul 07
I actually had never had a look at it. I just did did, and i have some that are still pending from 3 months ago. I think i should delete them. Why they just dont deny, i dont know. Best wishes to you, chook
1 person likes this
• Australia
31 Jul 07
Yeah that is what I wonder, if they just deny it then it is over and done with. I don't mind if they deny it, they have their reasons for doing it and it's their choice. Thanks!
• Indonesia
31 Jul 07
I have ever done some friend requests. But it did took long for them to approve them but not as long as yours. But I have errased one so far and it turned out to be my best friends. I was sure he didnt want me to be his friend any way. I had added him and when we chatted, I reminded him to approve few times but so far he didnt so I thought he made his point and I erased it. There are some possibilities that one doesnt approve it. Maybe they were just too be busy to do posting directly when they logged in, or maybe they were not paying attentions to the friends tab when they logged in. I did that once too, but now I always see the friends or messages tab when I first log in, just to make sure I dont miss anything.
1 person likes this
• Australia
31 Jul 07
That's a shame about your best friend, especially when you reminded him a few times. I am the same as you, I check the friends and the messages everytime I log in, just incase. Thanks!
• India
31 Jul 07
true ..very true..for a discussion i started on winning mail i saw your response and i took a tour of your profile.i find you intresting so i sent add. request.but i m still waiting while request is pending. your own reaction to others will give you a perfact reasons what other think and respond..for myLot m just a new born baby to comment..i juss can look forward for you to settle my request..lol..have a nice day
• Australia
31 Jul 07
Are you saying that you have requested me to be your friend? If so, I don't know why but it is not showing up. I would be happy to have you on my friends list. By the way, welcome to mylot. Thanks!
@rhane7315 (5649)
• Philippines
19 Apr 08
i just delete them because it they don't want me as friends then its fine with me