Is there anything you wish your friends/lover/family knew without explaining?

By Amy
Abernathy, Texas
August 20, 2007 1:24pm CST
Is there anything you wish you those in your lives could just get a clue to figure out about you? Like that your not a morning person... Or maybe there's something about you you wish people would respect in stead of constanctly bringing up - for me, I choose not to drive, even after I give my reasons, I get friends saying, oh we're going to get you behind the wheel. And they bring it up over and over. Which brings me to another thing people should get about me: The more you push me to do something, the less and less likely I want to talk or even consider it. That's not really a factor in why I don't drive, but I don't like to be pressured. If I decide to do something, if I change my mind, pressure isn't going to be why. What about you, what are you experiences in people trying to push you? Or what things do you really wish your friends would just know about you?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@natrlvr2 (384)
• United States
20 Aug 07
That I am disabled for a reason. I live in chronic pain 24/7 even though I take medication. Just because I do something one day does not mean I can do it the next. I work hard at 'looking' cheerful.I NEVER feel good but since I am a single mom I have to do what I have to do. I can't just lay in bed and whine about it.
1 person likes this
• Abernathy, Texas
21 Aug 07
Thank you for your reply. I don't know what your disability is, but many are 'invisible'. Lupis, RSI, MS - to some degree, sometimes they cause limping or deformities, but on 'good days' you can't tell. Sometimes on bad days. Its hard enough for these individuals who face this challenge to initially convince doctors that they're not goldbricking without having to convince family and friends. I don't have anything disabling (although I had EBV for years as a teen) but I get migraines - for me they've become more frequent and severe since the baby was born - and since I'm nursing I can't do anything about it. I don't even like to take Tylenol - besides, I have them so frequently then even with out nursing, who knows what all that medication would do to my liver. I say this just to say that the other day I had a migraine - now I get whoppers but this was the whopper of all whoppers - slammed in as soon as I woke up - and was accompanied by dizzyness, nausea and the eye problems - I had to give the baby over to my husband who works nights - sleeps days and I did whimper my way downstairs to do what I normally don't - take excederin migraine - then I whimpered my way upstairs. I didn't whine but I whimpered and it made me feel a little better. :)
@dpk262006 (56764)
• Delhi, India
21 Aug 07
Amy, I must say it is an 'Excellent Post'! You are right sometimes we surely wish that others should know that what we are thinking, what is going on in our minds. I am also like you, if I do not want to learn anything, I do not wish to be pressurised by others and do not wish to be be forced again and again. But you know my better half is such, she would encourage me cajole me, taunt me, jeer at me...so sometimes I am forced to do certain things which initially I hesitate to do. On the other hand, I have found certain things which I learnt unwillingly or forcibly, did help me in my daily life later on. Actually, everyone thinks that the other fellow's mind is working on the same line, as is hers/his, which is not the case. Good Day!
• Abernathy, Texas
21 Aug 07
Not just learning but doing. Like when I was younger and a few people - who weren't close friends tried to convince me to drink with them. My reasons for say, not driving aren't just, I don't feel like it, or I'm afraid, I have other reasons for never doing so...hearing over and over how helpful it is but knowing I can't due to slight dyspraxia, and not wanting the stress that comes along with driving - even for the most laid back person and all my other reasons er I'm explaining again... and this is what I feel I shouldn't have to do...anyway again thanks for your post, good to see you once again!
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@faith210 (11233)
• Philippines
20 Aug 07
Hi artemis432! I don't like being pushed or pressured to. I hope people around me would be more sensitive enough to know that I am no superhero, I mean sometimes they think I can do everything. I have my moods too and sometimes I really feel scared of life but people tend to depend on me and even I am sad, it seems they really don't get it. They wanted to see me happy and smiling always. I just wish that they will see that behind all my positive outlook in life, I am but a little scared girl. Take care and have a nice day!
• Abernathy, Texas
20 Aug 07
Wow Faith210, once again I'm blown away at your ability to be honest with your thoughts and feelings -and convey them so well! It must be hard that the world expects so much of you. Have you ever talked about this - in real life with family and friends - oops that was the discussion - what we wish they all just knew - could get a clue and figure out without having to have a long discussion on it. Its nice when people just get us.
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@faith210 (11233)
• Philippines
20 Aug 07
Hi artemis432! Well sure, I did! But they seem to be more sad than I am when I get into spilling my heart out. And when I see them that way, I tried hard to shake off my sad moments because I really don't want them to be saddened or depressed in any way. Oh never mind me, I guess I could always be strong enough for them because I do love my family. It's life, I think. Haha...Take care.
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• Abernathy, Texas
20 Aug 07
Just remember you're important too. Have you heard what they do on planes? Tell you to give oxygen to yourself and then to your kids? If a parent passes out - what good ar they to their kids. By the same token, its important to take time and energy out for ourselves - even to talk about what we're going through. If a friendship is true or strong its mutual. I feel offended when I find a friend went through something and didn't share, it seems a reflection of how good a friend I am. I always listen to my friends, and let them know their value by sharing my day and problems with them.
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