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Who was your baby before you had children?
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
United States
September 4, 2007 5:04am CST
Before your kids were born did you adopt other things or people into your life to fill the void? For instance did you focus on your career to make up for not having children? Or, did you get a pet who could be a good companion?
For years I dreamed about becoming a mom, but it never happened. And, to fill the void in my life, I adopted two adorable cats and took on frivolous time consuming jobs and projects that never amounted to anything. My cats really were my babies and filled a big void in my heart. They eased the loneliness and made me feel loved.
During the ten years that I spent, waiting for my daughter to make her grand entrance, I was notorious about adopting lost causes and trying to turn them into more productive citizens. I was a sucker for other people's problems and would spend entire days consumed in some minor issue that was going on in my extended family. You do that kind of thing when you have oodles of time on your hands and no little kids to chase after.
But, since having my own child, I've given up lots of the more time wasting and frivolous things that I did before. Simply put, I don't have enough time to babysit everyone else's problems or be anyone's surrogate mommy. One child is more than enough for now!
So, how did you fill your spare time before you had children? Did you have one thing, like a pet or car that you considered to be your baby?
3 people like this
15 responses
@violeta_va (4831)
• Australia
5 Sep 07
I had my 2 nephews (one was born when I was 14 the other one when I was 19) I lived for those kids and still. They stayed with us a lot and I used to buy them lots of things, play with them and take them places. I still do. when we go somwhere I still take them with me and also they come every weekend and stay with us. My little boy loves them he has special nick names for them (the 13 year old is "girl" because we make fun of him because he has a girfriend) and the 8 year old is chucky (because he rimind him of chucky from rugrats - funny thing is he looks nothing like him)
1 person likes this
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
5 Sep 07
That's too cute! My little kid loves the Chucky character. He's funny. I like him too.
@violeta_va (4831)
• Australia
5 Sep 07
well my nephew (the 8 year old) doent think its cute he hates it all more reason for us to joke
@williamjisir (22819)
• China
4 Sep 07
Before I got married, my baby was my wife. lol. I always called her, "Baby." She is still my baby, so is my son. Smiling.
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
4 Sep 07
That is such a sweet thing to say! I am sure reading it, would make your wife smile as well. I know that my own spouse felt very much the same way about me. He pampered me incredibly, so that I became a spoiled princess. Now it is hard to relinquish that spoiled princess spot to my own daughter who is very much the same as me.
My spouse and I wanted a baby for so many years, but fate or the heavens did not have it in the cards for us, until recently. We are both really very blessed people. Be well and best wishes for your family.
1 person likes this
@williamjisir (22819)
• China
4 Sep 07
Thanks for your nice wishes. The same to you, my dear friend.
@carlaabt (3504)
• United States
4 Sep 07
When my husband and I got married, he already had a dog. She had been staying with his parents since he was living in a dorm room. I had been to visit her several times and I already loved her before we got married. It wasn't hard at all for her to become my baby once we got married.
I wanted a smaller dog, though (she's a 55 lb lab mix). So we went to the humane society and found my princess dog. She's a lot smaller (ideally under 20 lbs, though she normally weighs just over), and she loves to be held. She's very spoiled and has slept with us since the first night we brought her home. Everyone told us that she would hate our son when he was born because she was so used to being the baby. But she loves my son and has the whole time. She's still our baby, too, and she knows it. So is our other dog, and our cat. They are all three so spoiled.
1 person likes this
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
5 Sep 07
My two cat babies were definitely the same way for me. I have the funniest cat story. When my little boy cat was a baby, he would nap on the carpet, while I watched TV. And, when the Baby Story would come on TLC, the Learning Channel, I would run over and get him and cuddle him like a baby through the entire episode until he woke up. It was too funny. I really wanted a baby that bad. After having my own daughter, my cats had to move over one tiny spot in my heart, but they are still important to me.
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
4 Sep 07
I worked full-time and didn't really have time for anyone else, however my nephew (my twin sisters eldest son) was my baby before I got married and had my son. I would spoil him all the time, take him out and even take care of him during teh weekends. I still consider him to be my second son :)
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
5 Sep 07
I spoiled my baby brother like that. Finally when I had a kid of my own, my brother was able to move on with his own life. He found a woman to take care of him, got married, had a baby, and got his degree. So, I couldn't be prouder! He has made something wonderful of himself.
@cynddvs (2948)
• United States
4 Sep 07
I had 2 cats before I had my daughter. I got these cats when I was single and living by myself. They were good companions and were always there to jump on my lap when I got home from work. One of my cats actually gave me hugs. She would put her paws around my neck and hug me. She was the sweetest cat in the world. So they were my children before my daughter. And none of my friends had kids for me to claim so I had to rely on my cats lol.
1 person likes this
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
5 Sep 07
*Giggle!* That's too cute! I love the cat hug thing. Right now, my baby girl cat is sitting on my lap, while I am typing. She has usurped my lap for her own purposes. I guess I'm lucky that I get to see my cats at all. My little (human) girl has adopted my baby girl cat and totes her around like a dolly. However, she despises my older male cat.
@gr8life (6251)
• Malaysia
4 Sep 07
Hello beautyqueen26,
I come from a big family. Before I have my own kid, I used to pamper my nieces and nephews. I have two adorable nieces who always be there for me. Yes, those two find that I am a good aunt as I always 'surrender' to their needs. I love to go out with them and they treated me more like their elder sister instead of their aunt. Right after giving birth to my son, I don't have much time to spend with them anymore. I feel sad but at the same time, I am happier with my life right now especially when I look at my cute little son.
1 person likes this
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
5 Sep 07
Babies always make you feel that way! Like life is finally perfect. It's a feeling that you can't really convey to someone who has never had a baby. Maybe it's hormones and maybe it's fate, but either way you feel at home when you have a kid of your own.
@sylvia13 (1850)
• Nelson Bay, Australia
4 Sep 07
Before my two kids were born, I focused on my work and friends and and then my nephews started coming to the world and they started filling my time and effort. I used to take them out for rides in my car, to eat corn, roasted peanuts, or ice-cream along the seaside promenade. They particularyl enjoyed to watch horse-driven carriages and they never got enough of that! When I travelled overseas, I always brought back presents and foreign lollies for them and one time I even tried to bring back some autumn leaves, without realising that it is the play of light on the leaves that makes the difference in the colour! At night I was specialist in making them fall asleep in my arms and I sure enjoyed that! The little boy that used to get that treatment is bigger than me now, 20 years old and is now living in Madrid, Spain!
@samtaylorskykierajen (7977)
• Canada
4 Sep 07
Before my husband and I had children we were children ourselves as we had our first child when we were 17 and 19 . We did take in stray animals that had lost their mothers for one reason or another . We took in a raccoon when I was pregnant with my first when the mother and the babies had all been hit by a car and this was the only one left to survive . It was so small it didn't even have teeth yet . We learned a lot about raccoons when we took this little guy in and raised him . Raccoons are very much like little children when they are scolded and are very clever . We also took in a bunch of bunnies another time and we took in so many stray cats and still do that I have lost track of how many .
@sacmom (14192)
• United States
4 Sep 07
My cat was my baby before (and even after) I had kids. When he was a kitten I'd let him curl under my chin and both of us would fall asleep. When he got older he'd still lay on me and we'd cuddle, though he was too big to curl under my chin anymore. LOL My husband and I would even take him places, like the park and my mom's...just like a human kid. :P LOL
Boy do I miss that cat... :*(
@andrejuly84 (1047)
• Romania
5 Sep 07
i had a pet,a little dog but i quite at it after get pregnant as it wasn't too healthy to keep it as it wasn't vaccinated it was just a yard dog
@surveygrrl (1270)
• United States
4 Sep 07
I had a cat named Sampson. He was my pride and joy.
One Christmas we even gave my MIL who was hounding us for children a shirt that said...Let me get this straight...my grandchild is a cat?
We had family photo's taken and he was wearing a button down shirt and vest, childs size 2T. He was a big cat, around 20lbs and just built big.
We had to get rid of him because he was getting mean when I was pregnant, peeing everywhere, biting, etc.
I am still sad he is gone.
@nonokid (20)
• Philippines
5 Sep 07
I know of some friends who just got themselves pets when they did not have children yet. Unlike you though, they slowed down with their careers in order to have a better chance of having kids. When I didn't have my daughter, I had lots of dogs to shower my affection on and they were my babies. Like you, when my little girl arrived I did'nt have much time for them. You're right about having kids they take up so much of your time especially the toddler years. It's the formative years that you really have to stay with thema nd make sure they grow up to be good and responsible kids. Three cheers for us parents the world over.
@dalexisbean (33)
• United States
5 Sep 07
My baby was my cat Braiden. He was the runt of the litter, I took him home and loved him and cared and fed him. He grew up to be such a good cat and very beautiful. I sure do miss him lots, we live in the country and he went outside and never came back. I tried to keep him as an inside cat but he just had the urge to get out. Anyway, I think a wild animal got him, I was so sad for a long time.
@moneyandgc (3428)
• United States
4 Sep 07
I got married two weeks out of high school and was pregnant 6 months later. I don't think I adopted a "baby." Maybe it was my husband at the time. I don't know, I was a baby myself when I had my first baby! My baby will be 10 years old this month! That being said, I guess I WAS kind of the "mother" of all of my friends. I kept them out of trouble. I was the responsible one.
