the ups and downs...does it ever end?

United States
September 13, 2007 9:22pm CST
I have been diagnosed with Bipolar 1 disorder. After that I had to resign from my place of employment due to my illness causing problems. I could no longer afford the medication or therapy. I tried to get help from the state and they all seem to look at me like I'm crazy or something. I have severe panic attacks when I try to interview and things are so up and down. Does this cycle ever end? I am so afraid of not being able to function "normally" ever again. If you have been through this or any onther ups and downs that affected your employment or employability could you please give some advice and I'd love to hear your story. Thanks again.
1 person likes this
4 responses
@saraho (23)
• United States
28 Sep 07
I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you. I would encourage you to see a counselor and or psychiatrist. Many counselors offer services on a sliding scale and even for free. Contact your local health department for referrals. Also, it is true that some of the symptoms of bipolar disorder can be controlled with behavior modification techniques like the fist poster suggested, but it's very much a chemical disorder of the brain. Medications can help, but you must be patient and give them time. Sometimes you will have to try several different medications and at different doses until you get one that is just right for you. When you say "resigned" do you mean you quit ordid you get fired? If you got fired you could be elligible for unemployment benefits and you may even have a case against your previous employer for wrongful termination due to your "disability". Good luck to you!
• United States
25 Sep 07
Hi! I am in the same type of situation you are in. I have not been officially diagnosed bp, but have always fit the criteria. Since I was about 12 years old, I can remember many episodes of mission mode, mania, and depression. I have been diagnosed as clinically depressed, and was prescribed Zoloft. Bad choice. I found the hard way that Zoloft does not do the trick with bp. I did read an article today that antidepressants without mood stabilizers causes mania in people with bp. I have never been able to keep a job in my entire life. I start having panic attacks when I get stressed and miss a lot of work due to the depression side. Therefore, I cannot afford to go to the doctor to be diagnosed and treated. I never even noticed anything was wrong with me, just always thought I was really moody. The day I realized that there was something more than just being moody was when my 5 year old son was diagnosed bipolar. As I started researching to learn about it, I found everything that I go through, letter by letter. I also realized that my birth father is also most likely bp. He was never diagnosed, but his family is a mental health nightmare. He was very abusive and explosive. This explained a lot about my childhood. However, unfortunately for you and me, after living with him for 14 years, I can tell you that without treatment, it does not get better, only worse. I know that is not what you wanted to hear, but it is the honest truth. Have you tried social security? Since you have already been diagnosed, you should qualify for ssi disability. My son recieves this. Also, if you recieve ssi disability, you almost always automatically qualify for medicaid. I would seriously look into this. Good luck, and if you need someone to talk to, just let me know.
• United States
19 Sep 07
I got diagnosed with Bipolar when I was 22. I'm now 29 and living with this disease every day. It has to effected my employment. I get mad and walk off the job. When I'm not on my medicin I get really irriatable, nervous, mad all the time and I shake. But when I'm taking something I feel so much better and can sleep at night. My mind dosent race. I did get help from the state, I get SSI and Medicade that pays for my meds. I take Zyprexa and Zoloft for the depression. My husband says I'm better to live with when I take my medication. I cant function with out them. So I know how you feel. If you have any questions or just want to talk, I'm here. You dont need to be alone.
@meholl (510)
• United States
15 Sep 07
First of all, I beleive you are bipolar, but that doesn't mean that it has to control your life, you need to control your life and your disorder. I assume that to a certain extent, before your diagnosis, you functioned pretty well. Or else you wouldn't have been able to maintain a job. I am bipolar and so is one of my children. So I have it worse than some, because me and my son feed off each others moods. Yet unmedicated, I function normally with an everyday life. Learn what your triggers are for the mania and depression. Go to a counselor, they can help you figure this part out. Then find ways of dealing with the triggers so that you can avoid the swing Personally, it sounds like you are using your disorder to live off of welfare. If your bipolar is severe, apply for SSI. But don't use your disorder as a reason to fall to peices.