My sister and her husband have welcomed a disgusting pig into their home....
By Sarah1977
@Sarah1977 (495)
United States
September 28, 2007 9:10am CST
Okay...this might be long, so bear with me please. My sister is married to a man named "Daniel" who basically believes that he is NEVER wrong. He has a very close friend named "Bob". Bob lives a few states away from my sister and her family. Daniel invited Bob to come and stay with him and his family for a few weeks, and Bob happily accepted the invitation. Now, Daniel (my sister's husband) works nights...he leaves the house at 4pm, and returns home after midnight. My sister and her 2 daughters are home alone during this time...only now, Bob is there with them. My sister has confided in me that Bob is trying in many ways to get her to be intimate with him. My sister has rejected all of his advances, but he keeps persisting. I told her that she should tell her husband about what his "friend" is up to, but she said she already tried. Her husband actually told her that SHE was just misunderstanding Bob..he's just a little flirtatious and outgoing. I am soooo furious, because my sister is going through hell every night when Daniel goes to work, and he does NOT even care!! I know it's because he doesn't want to even imagine that he could have made a mistake by allowing this wolf in sheep's clothing to come into his house to try to tear his family apart. I want so badly to talk to Daniel about this...my husband does too, but we feel like it's not our place to interfere. I love my sister, and it hurts me to see her going through this battle. What would you do?
3 people like this
14 responses
@Kashmeresmycat (6369)
• United States
28 Sep 07
That is really appalling to me...you know what I would do?
I would tell your sister to pack it up with her daughters and come to stay at your house until this idiot is gone!...or, pack it up and go to a Hotel until the jerk is out of the house. Maybe her husband will realize she's not making this up then.
Then, maybe her husband will realize this is not a joke....NO WOMEN should have to go through this.
What if something really happens to her?....Is her husband going to say "oh, I guess I was wrong?", or is he going to say "you were flirting with him and that's what you get"..........you've heard this over and over again and it's horrible, just plain outrageous!
@Kashmeresmycat (6369)
• United States
28 Sep 07
I thought of something else too, grrr, I'm so mad.........
What about if she plants a video camera without him knowing it? and keeps him in that area for a while video taping so her stupid husband can see it for himself.
1 person likes this
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
28 Sep 07
Thank you for your reply...I have asked her to come and stay with my family (with her daughters), but she said she will just deal with this jerk until he leaves. She's afraid to cause trouble between Daniel and his friend. It's driving me crazy!
1 person likes this
@davido (1623)
• Canada
28 Sep 07
Well its simple tell your sister to come over to your place until this doglike or maybe we should call him hegoat like friend is gone. Maybe the husband will still be able to keep his friendship with him, unless it is a planned thing between her husband and her friend. Everwatched the movie -Result of passion?. I hope i got the title right.
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
28 Sep 07
I actually thought about that too...Daniel is CONSTANTLY testing my sister...even with normal, everyday stuff. He really believes that he is "gifted" by God, and he has my sister believing that also. Thank you for your response.
@nana1944 (1365)
• United States
29 Sep 07
I wouldn't stick around someone like that even if I had to leave my own home. The deal about cameras would be a good idea. How old are the daughters? I would make sure they were with me at all times. If they have a lock on their bedroom door, I would go to their room with them and lock the door. A kick in the groin might make him highly uncomfortable and if the husband says anything about it then just tell him that since he wouldn't "man up" about the situation, then I did it for him.
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
3 Oct 07
I like your suggestion about the kick in the groin...lol! Also, I have spoken to my sister about my concern for her daughters, and I have also been calling my nieces everyday...They are 9 and 3. My sister does stick with the girls...They both sleep in her bedroom. Thanks for your response!
@StrawberryKisses (2833)
• Canada
29 Sep 07
Well if it were me I would tell her hubby whats going on or tell someone that will tell him. He needs to be told from an outside source. hmmmm I'm thinkin while I write too you could see if she can afford to buy a nanny cam or if she has a video camera. She could set it up where it always happens and have it playing when her hubby comes home so he can see for himself whats going on. Just a thought. I don't know what type of man her hubby is so I don't know if this is the best approach but you could just suggest it to her. I hope she's ok and good luck with all of this
1 person likes this
@wisedragon (2325)
• Philippines
28 Sep 07
Although Bob is a pig, Daniel himself is a pig. A loving husband would side with his wife in a situation like this, and at least tell Bob to stop the "flirting".
If I was your sister I would pack up and stay somewhere else. So what if the friendship between Bob and Daniel is damaged? Obviously Bob is not a true friend anyway, wanting to sleep with Daniel's wife.
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
3 Oct 07
You are right. It kills me to see my sister being hurt like this. Thank you for your response.
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
3 Oct 07
Oh...I forgot to tell you that I like the picture that you posted here...It looks just like Bob! :)
@saraho (23)
• United States
28 Sep 07
It sounds to me that your sister needs to be very up front with Bob. The next time he tries anything she needs to stop and say, "this is not okay with me. Touch me one more time and I will call the police". This is your sisters home as well and she can kick him out any time she sees fit and she can call the police if she feels threatened for any reason.
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
3 Oct 07
You are right...My sister should tell him very plainly to leave her alone. However, she feels obligated to be polite to him because he is her husband's friend, and she should be hospitable. Her and I are VERY different...If it were me, I would have slapped him in the face the first time he put his hands on me. Then again, my husband is also VERY different then hers....My husband would be CRAZY if any of his friends were inappropriate with me.
@reinydawn (11643)
• United States
29 Sep 07
Well, I'm a bit more straighforward than other people, and I usually don't care what they think of me, so I'd say something to him, or at the very least tell "Bob" to knock it off. The hard part in this situation is the repercussions to your sister and the children. It sounds to me like "Daniel" is a bit controlling???? I don't care for people like that anyways, so I'd have a hard time with him also.
Do you live close by? Is there room in your house? Maybe you can let her stay with you until this guy leaves? That might wake up her husband in the very least....
Best of luck to you!
@coffeeshot (3783)
• Australia
29 Sep 07
I definitely agree with the first response- pack up and move out. Not only does your sister have to put up with this crap but her two daughters (I'm not sure how old they are) have to as well. No matter how old they are they will sense the tension in the house. This guy is obviously a creep and doesn't really care much for the consequences of his actions. Also, I think it is very sad that your sister can not tell her husband about this. If her own hiusband won't believe her, that's terrible and would make her feel very powerless. This guy sounds like the biggest creep and it's freaky that he keeps trying even though she rejects him. Who knows- he could get violent or force himself upon her. I think you need to intervene and protect your sister and your nieces. I know if it was my sister in that situation I'd pretty much be dragging her out of that house to come stay with me until her husband saw the light, kicked this loser out and apologised. Good luck.
@sugarfloss (2139)
• Malaysia
28 Sep 07
oh no,how are the kids taking it?how's your sister doing?it's really disturbing.i would definitely go to your place till the pig leaves if i were your sister.i worry for our nieces!
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
3 Oct 07
I also worry for my nieces...I have called them and talked to them everyday since that guy has been there...Thanks for your response!
@kitty1234 (1476)
• United States
28 Sep 07
Hate to say it, but your sisters husband is an idiot! He should liste to his wife and try and protect her from things like this. Maybe you and your husband can go over there after dinner everynight so Bob will never have her alone. If your husband and Daniel are friendly maybe he could mention your sister is afraid of Bob and suggest that Daniel listen to her. Good Luck to your sister, if none of this works I would up and leave Daniel and Bob to each other!
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
28 Sep 07
Your suggestion about my husband and I going over there every night after dinner is really good...except for the fact that I think my husband would not be able to contain himself if he saw that pig face to face. I seriously am afraid that my husband will end up in jail over this loser....It's pretty sad that MY husband cares more about what my sister is going through then her own husband. Anyways, thank you for your response.
@goinliveinfive (561)
• United States
28 Sep 07
Does she have a friend that could be at the house while Cassanova is there? It doesn't seem like she's going to get much support from hubby and it's only a matter of time before Bob-o starts getting a little more aggressive. He already knows he has hubby snowed so there is very little to keep him from becoming abusive at this point. I'm concerned that eventually something bad will happen if she allows herself to be alone with him.
Not for nothing, but it's her house too and it might be very well work the war that would ensue if she just told him to get his lazy butt and his stiffening member out of her house.
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
3 Oct 07
Yeah...I agree with you 1,000,000%! I have basically been harassing her everyday about it, so she has begun to tell me that everything is "fine" now. I don't believe her for one second. My husband wants to go over there and beat this guy to oblivion, but realistically that's not smart. We have a family, and we can't risk having my husband go to jail for this....Anyway, thanks for your comment.
@insanity01 (48)
• Canada
28 Sep 07
Has she tried talking to Bob yet? If so and it doesn't help the situation, in my opinion, the only way to get through to a person who is so stuck in their own world that they can actually believe they they're never wrong, is total manipulation. Sure it sounds bad but it really depends how far your sister is willing to go. If she is being disrespected every night and her husband doesn't do a thing about it, *guilt trip him*.
"Daniel, Bob hits on me every night and it's making me feel uncomfortable"
"He's just misunderstood. You have nothing to worry about"
"I've tried telling you many times, why won't you believe me?"
"Like I said, he's just misunderstood. Don't worry"
"Why do you hate me so much that you'd put me through this?"
"I don't hate you. What are you saying?"
"I just don't understand why you'd hate me so much to do this"
Fight fire with fire. If two solid immobile rocks were stuck in their place and one of them was arrogant enough to always want to be right, this will bother them so much that it gives them no choice but to back down. But, that's only what I would do. Of course, she could call the police for harassment which is probably the more civil approach.
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
3 Oct 07
That would work on anyone else besides my sister's husband...He is so stubborn and hard to reach. He would honestly just laugh at my sister if she tried this. Thank you so much for your advice!
@lgwlong (199)
• China
29 Sep 07
firstly your sister's husband should understand the problem how serious it is now,anyhow ,he invite his friend to his home ,so he should let him leave
@Vieiragirl (109)
• United States
28 Sep 07
She should record him on tape either voice or video tape then her husband can't deny it
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
3 Oct 07
That's a great idea! I'll mention that to my sister...Thanks for your reply!
