The Funniest Joke!

SUNBURN....SMART DOC.... A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours and gets a horrible sunburn. He goes to the hospital and is promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second degree burns. With his skin already starting to blister and seeing the severe pain he is in, the doctor goes ahead and prescribes continuous intravenous feeding with saline, electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours. The nurse, who is rather astounded, asks, "What good will Viagra do him, Doctor? "It'll keep the sheets off his legs."

Girls night out Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home. The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'

a women went to an art gallery and was looking at the paintings she came to one painting and became very puzzled the qwner of the gallery walked by and she asked him about the painting she said there are 3 black men in this painting but one of them has a white willy why was it painted this way? the owner replied this is a painting of 3 coal miners the one with the white willy went home for dinner

This is one of my favorites: Two Hillbillies Two hillbillies walk into a bar. While having a shot of whiskey, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, "Kin ya swallar?" The woman shakes her head no. "Kin ya breathe?" The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no. The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar. His partner says, Ya know, "I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver'," but I ain't never seed nobody do it!"

here's a joke...

i don't like joke

the worm sais to his girlfriend: if you don't marry me,i'll jump in fron of the chicken!!! do we get best responses too?:P

I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out. (Rodney Dangerfield)

guys walkin in cali and says i want one wish god. then all of a sudden god comes out of the sky and asks wats this wish. he said he wants a bridge to hawaii so gods like thats very materialistic i can do it even tho the supports have to reach the bottom of the ocean so think of something else he thinks and says i've been divorced a bunch of times and he wishes he could understand them to know what they want so he can make a woman truly happy. to that god replies with do you want 2 lanes or 4 on that bridge?

What does a dyslexic agnostic with insomnia do? Stays up all night wondering if there's a dog.

WHATS THE OPPOSITE OF 'dominos'..? . . . . . . . . . . . think again.. . . . . . . . . . . . 'domi'doesnt'knows'....