Loving a drug addict
October 27, 2006 7:48pm CST
Is there anyone else out there in a relationship with a person addicted to drugs? I presently am, and have run out of ideas on how to help him. Even though he tells me he wants to quit using he is not or does not. We have only been together for 5 months, in the beginning he was not using. But what I did not know he was fresh out of a rehab program. He is totally out of control; he has sold nearly everything I own just to buy more drugs. My friends tell me to leave him, but I love him and he has no one else left in his life. Any thoughts?
• United States
3 Jan 07
Addicts have a disease. It's called addiction. Lots of people are addicted to something, but most that I know of don't sell their loved one's things. I have loved addicts (friends, family) & I hate to see them suffer. I helped them in the past, but when my children were born I had to let them fall & to keep me from breaking from all the responsibilities falling on my sholders. Only you know whatis best in your own personal situation
• United States
28 Nov 06
Loving the active addict is the most difficult love. It doesn't matter if it is a boyfriend, spouse, parent or child. Learning not to enable is a difficult lesson, yet it is one that anyone who loves the addicted has to learn. Loving the addicted is a huge investment, both emotional and financial. I can only tell you what I learned in the four years I was the assistant admin at an addictions help site. You Can't cause it. Can't control it. Can't fix it. It is up to him to help himself. He has the tools, now he has to use them. Rehab is like school, it is not a cure. He has to want to be in recovery before he will be in recovery. Many addicts want to quit, most of those don't know how...even after rehab they don't know how. I can tell you that you need to stop trying to fix him, and spend that energy trying to fix yourself.