My friend is accidentally pregnant what am I supposed to tell her?

Pregnant - My friend is not ready to keep it
@kwenge (2489)
Kenya
October 26, 2007 7:34am CST
She lives with her parents, both parents are very rough on her because she is the first borne. She is in college right now, the guy responsible for the pregnancy is also a mere college girl. Now she is contemplating on abortion. She knows I have the money I can lend her for the proceedure. What should I do now? the pregnancy is 20 days old according to the lab report.
7 people like this
14 responses
@hopejordan (3562)
• Australia
26 Oct 07
hi there kwenge well when i was pregnant one time i told my parents straigtht away and even with my second one it is better to tell them straight away cause later it will be worse. my parents love my kids very much. i am a single mother so iwould tell them straight away. god bless you have agreat day
5 people like this
• Philippines
26 Oct 07
Give her a knife and tell her to stab you. If she can't, tell her she's doing exactly the same thing with the babe inside her tummy --- killing! You have to really convince her of this and you have to be firm. If her parents are strict, she should have thought of that before having a party. If you're a true friend, don't allow your friend to be a murderer. Good luck!
4 people like this
@kara5287 (299)
• United States
26 Oct 07
oh please. do you personally know what it is like to be pregnant at a young age with nothing to give the child and have noone to turn to?
• Philippines
26 Oct 07
Do you know what its like to hope that you will live but you are innocently killed? Who's fault is it anyway? Is it the innocent child's? If you guys knew that would be the consequence of your action, you should have thought better of it. The solution is not killing another life. Its standing for your own stupid carelessness.
4 people like this
@kwenge (2489)
• Kenya
26 Oct 07
Gosh! I dont know what I should do now! they way you have put your statement is somehow humorous and somehow serious. I dont know what to think.........lol.
7 people like this
@kara5287 (299)
• United States
26 Oct 07
well she knows that abortion is one of her options and there is a way to pay for it. now it's all up to her on what she decides to do. all you can do now is be there for her and support whatever she decides. best of luck to both of you.
4 people like this
@kwenge (2489)
• Kenya
26 Oct 07
Thanks friend for your comment. Yes I will support her in any decision she make. Thanks
5 people like this
@kara5287 (299)
• United States
26 Oct 07
you are very welcome. just remember not to listen to anyones sermons. it's a legal choice for a woman to make. if that's what she choses then so be it. after all it is her life no one elses. hope all goes well.
4 people like this
• United States
26 Oct 07
If she is willing to go through with it then you can lend her the money. It is her choice to precede it or not.
4 people like this
@Calais (10898)
• Australia
26 Oct 07
Im just a bit confused on how she can be 'accidently' pregnant. They knew what they were doing, maybe unexpected but not accidently...Tell her to do what she likes, because thats what it comes down to in the end, either way she has to live with that decision the rest of her life..
3 people like this
• Ireland
28 Oct 07
I think people that go around preaching there opinions on abortion in the guise of offering advice to this guy (whose situation may or may not be genuine) are a bunch of windbags. as for this guy I don't understand why he is turning to complete strangers for advice on something that is very straightforward. If his friend and her boyfriend don't want the baby and this guy won't accept responsibility...ie pay for the abortion..a donation from yourself would be extremely generous and I think unwarranted. Unless your trying to woo this girl towards the prospect of a future romance I think the best solution would be to lend her the money for the abortion.
2 people like this
@raychill (6529)
• United States
1 Nov 07
hrm. it's interesting you're curious about how it was an accident. I voiced the same thing. right above you actually.
@RobinJ (2501)
• Canada
26 Oct 07
you tell her to do what is best for her and support her . What she chooses to do is her business and no ones and I mean no one else's. I do not know her circumstances and for me to judge her would be immoral and improper. I believe, what I believe, and you can believe what you want. this is not about what is right or wrong, but a girl in trouble and a friend trying to support her, so get off the case for and against abortion, It is not all about you and what you want.
• Kottayam, India
27 Oct 07
girl+girl= what type of pregnancy ???
2 people like this
@kara5287 (299)
• United States
27 Oct 07
ya know i wondered about that too but i just figured it was a typo. lol
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 Oct 07
I've been watching this youth-oriented show about high school kids. Three of the girls in the show got pregnant (but not at the same time). One of them had the baby aborted. Another went through with the pregnancy but had the baby adopted -- right after the baby was born, he was taken away by a social worker. And the last girl kept her baby, who became her inspiration in life. I think adoption is a better option than abortion. Or she may want to keep the baby also? I have cousins who had kids at a young age but their parents love their grandchild now. In the end, the decision is up to her, but I hope she knows that abortion is not her only option.
2 people like this
• United States
27 Oct 07
thank u for your opinion about the subject i hope she listens to u u said it nicer than what i would of read my reply below
2 people like this
@anniepa (27909)
• United States
27 Oct 07
I think you should support your friend in whatever she chooses to do and be there for her before, during and after. Don't listen to those who say these crazy things about it being murder, etc. At 20 week it is just a mass of cells and has no brain and therefore can feel no pain. Birth control failure does count as an accidental pregnancy and those who are so opposed to the right to choose should take responsibiity for all the babies they're so determined to be brought into the world by women and young girls who aren't prepared or willing to bring them here. Just be a friend, which I'm sure is just what you're going to do! Annie
2 people like this
• United States
26 Oct 07
There has already been enough people arguing over the abortion option so I wll just leave that at this. I do not believe in abortion as an option personaly. I think there are other options. Adoption, while a hard option, is an admirable one. Giving your child a better chance at life then you can provide. I have 2 great kids, and my life has beenso blessed by them. Even if I wasnt ready to have them when I did I would never wish they were not here. No matter what she chooses she should still tell her parents about the situation. They might not be as bad as she thinks. She should accept the responcibily for her actions, even if they were accidental. I hope your friend gets all the luck in the world. Please update us to how this turns out.
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
1 Nov 07
I am totally against abortion under any circumstances. I completely understand your friends problem. But, abortion should not be an option at all. it is murder.
• United States
1 Nov 07
Okay. Murder is the legal term that is used for the unlawful killing of another person. Abortions are legal. So explain to me how abortions can be murder if they are legal.
1 person likes this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
4 Nov 07
When did God make murder legal? I am not speaking of a man made law, I am speaking of God's law. You see, when it is all said and done, he is the one you will have to answer to for this.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Nov 07
Rozie, when was the last time you spoke to God personally? Quite frankly you really have no idea what "God's Law" is, all you know is what people tell you it is, which makes it "man-made". The bible was written by men who "say" they spoke to god, but you really can't know what god really intended. Priests and preachers are men who "think" they know what god wants, but you can never know for certain if they're speaking the truth or just controlling you by adding "god says" onto whatever they want you to do. There is NO WAY to know for certain what god's laws, plans or wants are, but we do know that we have free will to live our lives and make decisions for ourselves.
2 people like this
@ayou82 (3457)
• Philippines
5 Nov 07
Well thats alright thats life. She have the baby now then let it live for theres nothing you can do. ANd up to her to decide if she wants to keep it.. It happen to me the same thing when I was only 18, i was so scared to tell my momma that im pregnant i was crying over the phone.. Parents are parents what kind of parents she have if they say to her have an abortion..which is very dangerous. Theres nothing she could do but to accept the fact that she is going to be a mother soon. Tell her to be strong...
@eden32 (3975)
• United States
16 Nov 07
Abortion is NOT very dangerous.
@eden32 (3975)
• United States
16 Nov 07
I think a good friend would just listen to her while she works out what she wants to do & support her with her decision no matter what it is.
• Bulgaria
31 Oct 07
I'm sorry to hear about this.I see you can go through this because you have the money.Once I talked o my mother about this kind of stuff. I asked her what if I get pregnant,what should I do - abort or keep the baby.My mom said that it's better to abort. I got a little surprised from her reaction. But I returned that this is murder and I can't do it if happens and she said I'm too young for keeping a baby.So i know that if this happens to me, may be I'll make an abort. So do it before it gets too late. After all your friend is in college,she has to study.It's early for her to raise a family.But make sure you find a proper doctor for the procedure.Good luck!