from lover to friend (break-ups)
October 30, 2007 11:00pm CST
i distinctly remember posting another discussion like this before..about getting over a romantic relationship. this is about the same person. and as far as this is concerned, all for the same reasons. we are breaking up because of a conflict of faith. just last week, we were good. very good actually that we were even planning on things to do together this week. but she had to go to a convention, it's a church thing, she was busy all weekend. i patiently waited, eager for the week to come and to finally see her. but suddenly, when she got back, the mood changed, things changed, she changed. suddenly she was more determined to break-up with me, to stop this relationship we have. she values her faith more than anything else, and that means letting me go..letting 'us' go. i was taken aback. surprised. shocked. i wasn't expecting anything like that. but i know deep in my heart, i should've known. this has been an issue for a long time. this has been an issue from the start. yet we lasted for a year..and still i never expected it. it's either i'm delusional or just merely hopeful that this love we have could overcome any barrier. we haven't talked personally, she broke up with me through phone. she's busy with church. and i, i'm stuck here at home, trying to find a way to vent out all the emotions, trying to find a consolation or a slight relief from all these. but i know that the only thing that would make me ok is a word from her that we're still together..but i'm just hoping. i've talked to friends and somehow they helped but the agony is just too much to contain right now.. i don't want to lose her. she told me she loves me but she loves her faith more than anything.. i just don't want to lose her. i don't want to lose another friend i treasure so much. i've been through a heartbreak before and i lost a good friend in that. and i don't want that happening again. if i can't be her lover, i'd rather be her best friend. i'm not sure what i would want to hear or what i would need to know. i guess i just needed to share a piece of my mind and let the pain flow out through my thoughts.. the conflict? we're both girls.
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