what is your opinion on cohabitation?
By mari123
@mari123 (1861)
China
November 25, 2007 6:34am CST
nowadays, with the rapid increasing of divorce rate, a couple of lovers tent to have a period of cohabitation as a test before their marriage, to look into whether they both will live compatibly.
Everything has two sides, so is cohabitation. What is you viewpoint towards it ?
1 person likes this
4 responses
@cliffcliff (1350)
• United States
9 Dec 07
It is not a good choice... because there is NO commitment. marriage is mostly about committing to love and staying together. Cohabitation means there is no commit.
it is not a really a test of love.
-cliff
@UnselfishShellfish (1306)
• United States
10 Dec 07
"there is no commit."
You are by far the most close minded, pig headed individual on this board.
No "commit?" Bulshyte. Marriage is hardly a "commit" anymore. With divorce rates like they are, marraige is not a forever.
My "husband" and I are far more committed than anyone I know. and yet we are not married. Why marry? We bought a house together. That's our way of being committed to each other.
@cliffcliff (1350)
• United States
10 Dec 07
I am not close-minded at all, i have just been around for a while.
If marriage was not that important, then why has it been a legal contract? (for thousands of years). Dont you think humans have tried all sorts of ways of cohabitating over the millenia?
Living together is great for the guy, a bad deal for the woman in the long run. Marriage spells commitment. Living together spells....?
Also when i spell "commit" it is obviously a short-cut for commitment.
@UnselfishShellfish (1306)
• United States
10 Dec 07
"marriage was not that important, then why has it been a legal contract? (for thousands of years). Dont you think humans have tried all sorts of ways of cohabitating over the millenia?"
Actually you're wrong. Marriage in it's present form has not been around for that long, only a few hundred years. Before that, women were considered property and they belonged to a man because he said so.
"Living together is great for the guy, a bad deal for the woman in the long run. Marriage spells commitment. Living together spells....? "
Commitment. Either spells comittment. You can have comittment with or without a piece of paper. Marraige is hardly a comittment anymore. It's not even a promise of tomorrow or a guarantee of a lifetime of love and happiness.
And why is it a bad deal for me because I'm a woman? Explain that one.
"Also when i spell "commit" it is obviously a short-cut for commitment. "
Good for you. And here I thought it was your bad English.
@UnselfishShellfish (1306)
• United States
7 Dec 07
There is nothing wrong with living with someone without marraige. Marraige is an outdated institution meant to enslave and control women. Just take a look at how marraige got started: A man from a tribe would go to a neighboring tribe and steal one of the women. Then to keep her from running, he'd bind and tie her hands and feet together until she'd quit running. Then when she would no longer try to run, he'd put a piece of rope around her left ring finger just as a reminder that he owns her forever.
My relationship may not be a "real" marraige complete with groomsmen, a cake and a nice dress, but to us, it's as real as it's going to get.
There is nothing wrong with it. My relationship is not a test or a trial. It's my relationship with a man I love and just because we don't share a last name (I wouldn't change mine even if we did marry) or a wedding license, it doesn't mean I love him any less than if we did decide to get married.
I am always in favor of it before marraige. You spend a few hours a night with your partner and how well do you really know him? I didn't know my SO snored, thought the landry hamper was an oversized trash can or believed that his idea of folding laundry was leaving dry clothes on the stove for me to fold until we moved in.
I'm not going to leave him over those reasons, but it was nice to find out before hand. Who knows? If we got married, that laundry thing could have made us divorce.
@academic2 (7000)
• Uganda
25 Nov 07
I see no prblem with cohabitation, th only problem comes when the two cohabit and then later fall apart and get another partner to cohabit, I mean, it disgusts me to see a serial cohabitor, so cohibitation must lead to marriage if it is to make sense to me.
@men82in (1268)
• India
25 Nov 07
To avoid misunderstandings ofocourse both should be trained to be habituated towards surrender in all things or hurdles . So be habituated to surrender with partner is a only way towards avoid misunderstandings netween family. Or else give take also tobe for both the partners. Above things must be not before child within partners strictly.
