Different approach to gift-giving
By scribe1
@scribe1 (1203)
United States
December 26, 2007 1:39pm CST
Over the years, I wasted a lot of time searching stores in the mall for my sister's present. I say "wasted" because the item I ultimately purchased did not make my sister happy, although she didn't express her disappointment directly.
At the same time, my sister also wasted time, ultimately giving me an item which was okay overall, but not one that I would have chosen for myself and actually worn.
To counteract all of the disappointment, I asked my sister what she really, really wanted and she told me --- a certain kind of jacket. I told her that I would pay for whatever jacket that she chose at the store right then and there. Well, it worked! She probably shopped around a lot before going to the store with me, and lo and behold, she found what she wanted almost immediately and I paid for it.
She asked me what I wanted and I told her that I needed a new boombox. She bought it. She also bought a little wind-up toy, knowing that I'm a little kid at heart. I bought her a Dunkin Donuts giftcard and enclosed a couple of dollars extra. She especially liked that!!!
The upshot is that we're both happy.
What do you think of this approach, and would you ever try it yourself, or not?
5 people like this
9 responses
@aidenofthetower (1814)
• United States
27 Dec 07
My family has often had this approach. Some of it is because my mom is so picky. She is picky and complains if she doesn't like it. As kids we learned very quickly it was best to give her money or take her shopping. We often did that for each other too. As someone who never had the surprise of opening the gift, I rather like shopping for my husbands family and waiting to see what I will get them. But, whatever works for you is wonderful!
1 person likes this
@kellys3ps (3723)
• United States
27 Dec 07
That is the approach my hubby uses to buy my presents because I am so difficult to shop for - I never really know what I want..
1 person likes this
@kareng (54331)
• United States
27 Dec 07
I think it is fine, especially with someone as close as your sister. I bet you both had a blast shopping together also! I would consider making this one of your holiday traditions. It sounds like a lot of fun--spending the day with your sister shopping and getting your Christmas shopping done at the same time.
@Kowgirl (3490)
• United States
26 Dec 07
Well that sounds like a winner to me . At least both of you can not complain because you picked out your own gift. But it did take away the surprise of not knowing and that my friend is part of the giving part I like the most. I like to think that I know the person I am buying for and will be able to pick something they will like. It is easier to do with a close friend because you spend more time with friends than you do with your family. But if this works then by all means I would continue to use this method of buying for my sister. Glad to hear both of you were happy doing this.
Happy New Year
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
27 Dec 07
That is a wonderful idea. Since you both knew what you wanted and you did not want to buy it for yourself because there were other things, that was a good idea. We have gone through, especially me, not getting what we really wanted. In my case in gift giving, it was because I could not afford to, but in my husband's case, he could have afforded to it, although I did get the Kitchenaid I wanted, but that was because my Sunbeam mixmaster broke down. This time, I got a electric wok, now I have to find how to use it to cook six dishes for New Years.
@goddessglamourpuss (261)
•
26 Dec 07
I think that sounds like a very sensible approach to gift giving. I too have "wasted" time and money trying to buy gifts for my own sister so have now resorted to a gift voucher for her favourite shop. It felt a bit cheap the first time I did it as I like to put thought into my gifts and spend a long time really looking for things I know the recipient will like. Yet this way I know that she will be able to get exactly what she wants. I'm afraid it would not really work going out to the shops together as she is sooo fussy we could spend hours looking for something and come home empty handed. Yet I would be reluctant to accept her paying for something for me because she would take me to expensive shops as she has more money to spend and I would feel uncomfortable with not being able to reciprocate properly.
I guess your approach would work well for others but as you and your sister are happy that's all that really counts.
@arkaf61 (10881)
• Canada
27 Dec 07
It's a rational approach and one that will probably keep everyone happy as long as the person asked remembers the giver's budget.
For me it wouldn't really work because it would take away the surprise element, and that's the best part of a gift to me. But I am sure it could work with a lot of people for whom surprises are not important.
