I am worried about my baby

@babykay (2133)
Ireland
January 5, 2008 4:39pm CST
Folks this may seem like I am worrying about things needlessly....and its probably true because there is little I can do right now. But I am so worried. My son is young, approaching his 2nd birthday. Me and his Dad, my husband love him so very much. We thought he would never come and when we learned he was due we were thrilled. What worries me is, the world. It seems like such a squalid, evil place. Each day we hear of new threats to our safety, sanity and well being. There is global warming, child molestation, bullying in schools, car accidents. I look at my little treasure and I know that if anything really bad were to happen to him - I couldn't bear the pain of him being in pain. I would do anything to keep him well and healthy. But this world we live in is so full of danger. If I get him to the age of 10 unscathed - then he has the teenage years where he might take drugs. True, I will do al I can to persuade him not to and educate him etc, but there is no guarantee. Then there is the issue of young male violence - he could get beaten up and put in a coma. Anything could happen to him - at any stage of his life. Right now as he is being brought up in an atmosphere of love and understanding (most of the time) there is some kid his age who is not so fortunate and is being taught violence and hate. Sorry for going on and for the long long post. I am so worried about my baby....
5 people like this
15 responses
@dania_elm (422)
• United States
5 Jan 08
obviously u love ur son very much so u r going to worry when i had my 1st i was in the same boat u are in he is 10 now and hes a great kid he comes to me with his problems if he sees something that is wrong he tries to make it right we have a very open and honest relationship the key is let him know no matter what decisions he makes u will be there for him not to judge or to tell him what to do but to talk to him and hopefully guide him in the right direction he will say some crazy stuff dont flip out calmly tell him that in a little bit u two are gonna go get a sundae and sit down and discuss the issue make sure u follow through all should be well
1 person likes this
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
6 Jan 08
you know, through reading your post I have realised that what I am afraid of is him becming the way I was - non communicative and suspicious. But I now realise that the reason I was like that was because of the way my parents were to me. So the obvious answer is to be open, honest and loving to him, hopefully he will trust me enough to listen to and believe me. Thanks
• United States
6 Jan 08
i have 5 wonderful kids and i think that the reason they are so great is because when i started having them i was still young to remember the things i wished my mom had said and done with us and that is what i do with my kids i have no worries about them getting to stuff when they get older our lines of communication are very open
@fianne (1059)
• United States
8 Jan 08
yes, i agree, dania_elm... don't worry about others and the surroundings. worry about how to become a good parent.
@gdisites (161)
• United States
6 Jan 08
Not a whole lot you can do except try to make a difference in our world. I think that every parent shares your worry. Anyone who has ever tried to make a small difference in the world has done it out of love for their children. Kids are so precious - if we don't do it for them - then for whom? Bring him up the best you can. Teach him, talk to him about others and help him to see things from their perspective. Hope he learns from what you have to say. From that point on it's up to him as it was up to you as you grew and had good and bad experiences in your life.
• United States
6 Jan 08
The best thing you can do is to stop worrying. One, by worrying you are bringing unnecessary negative energy to the situation, and in doing that you will cause the exact thing you don't want to happen, to do so. Keep your mind on the things you do want and off the things you don't want. Focus on the positive things that are out there in the world for your son. I know you will be hard pressed to find some, but there is good out there. If you keep expressing to your son what it is you want him to do, he will internalize the message. It is up to you to send the right one.
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
6 Jan 08
Thank you. I have to stop focussing on the negativet. Though it is necessary to be watchful. I guess it needs some attention to finding the correct balance between watchfulness and recklessness. Thanks again you have made me think.
• United States
5 Jan 08
Aside from what the others said, if anything does happen, it happens for a reason. If you believe that, it will be much easier to wake up in the morning.
@babykay (2133)
• Ireland
6 Jan 08
It takes a strong person to accept something bad happening to a loved one. And if you accept it happens for a reason,. you have to be able to say what the reason is. Can you tell me a reason why something really bad could happen to anyone's baby? I am genuinely curious. I am sure you are right on some level.
• United States
10 Jan 08
You are not alone. I feel the same way. Our world is a very scary place. Schools have become unsafe, even our own backyards are unsafe. I worry about my kids as much as you do (if not more). :) You are right, it will only get worse especially when they are out of your sight. All you can do is teach them, not force them to do the right things in life. Education is the key. Good Luck! Children are great gifts aren't they?
@lightningd (1041)
• United States
10 Jan 08
I think you are worrying too much. You are doing what you can to raise a healthy happy child and as long as you are a constant support in his life, and teach him right from wrong, warn him of the dangers when he is older and may be exposed to them, he will be just fine. I think you are just over stressing yourself. Take one day at a time. Danger is going to be there no matter what, and as long as you prepare your child to make good decisions, you and your son will be fine.
@fianne (1059)
• United States
8 Jan 08
it is very obvious that you love your kid... i understand your feeling as a mother since i am a mother, myself... my son justturned one year old. i am having problems like you do, but i worry much on how to become a good parent. for me, if i raise my son very well and in good guidance, being a good influence to him, he will never stray his way. i believe your kid will be a very good kid one day, don't worry. just be a good parent. i let my son feel i love him by talking to him always, touching him always, telling him i love him... it's ok even if he still does not understand things, but he can feel. God bless to you... don't worry, just be a good parent.
• United States
6 Jan 08
It is natural for a mother to worry about their children.There has always been and there always will be evil in this world.That will never change.People still have children no matter what is going on.You know all the dangers of the world,all you can do is your best to watch over your children and guide them.You will even worry about your children when they are grown but just a tiny bit less,not much.Its just part of being a mother.Pray a lot and put your worries in Gods hands.It helps.Let God watch over you and yours.
6 Jan 08
The thing is it's always been there, people have been cruel and violent since the dawn of time. When you become a parent it just suddenly becomes so in your face and scary. You've brought this child into the world, and up to the moment he was born you've probably never felt that kind of fierce overwelming all consumming love for another. You want to protect your child from everything, every danger and possible threat. It is the knowledge that knowing soon he'll be in pre-school then school, not under your protective gaze, it is scary, but you will learn to stop torturing yourself with the what ifs, all we can do as parents is hope we've taught them values, rights and wrongs etc that they know they can come to you with their own fears. We can't protect them from the whole world and thats the hardest part of being a parent.
@Ohara_1983 (4119)
• Kuwait
6 Jan 08
that will be normal for the parent to worried about thier children, yes your right we cannot give a guarantee for our kids, we can give them all our love, share with them thier happenes but still we dont know when they become big what future they will. we cannot say even they become big we still there for them all the time. we cannot promise maybe we will die soon but they still young so still we cannot say anything.
@fanji008 (782)
• China
6 Jan 08
Hi,there! You don't need to be so worried. Every baby needs to grow up and there are certain steps they'll need to take in the process.Parents can't always protect though they always want to.And maybe sometimes the kid doesn't want that kind of protection.As we know that,some hurts are necessary for our human beings to learn things.If we don't get the hurt,we may never understand life that well.Actually everybody is also learning to protect themselves.So don't worry,your baby will grow up and he'll know how to protect himself.Relax and I hope everything is going well with you and your baby! Have a nice day^_^
@RobinJ (2501)
• Canada
6 Jan 08
I understand your feelings every parents looks at their children and feel the same way, I am sure you parents had the same fears as most of the stuff listed has been going on forever, it was not talked about but trust me it was there. so all you can do it try to do your best and if you are able to instill good values in him he will turn out all right,your parents had the same concerns, and you turned out all right so it does happen
@garnet80 (354)
• Australia
6 Jan 08
Everyone worries about their kids. My Mum said that a parent will never stop worrying even after they move out of home. It's nice to know that someone cares so much about us. Your son with appreciate it when he's older. I feel the same way about my son too. It's a natural thing. And yes I agree with you, I really don't know what the world is coming to. It's so violent and some people just don't seem to care about others.
@Sillychick (3279)
• United States
6 Jan 08
I understand your fears. The world is a scary place. I get really sad sometimes thinking about the kind of world my son will grow up in. But there is hope. The best thing we can do as parents is to teach our children how to survive and thrive. We can teach them values and how to work hard and care for other people. We can contribute to the betterment of the world by helping our children to be good people who do good things. Teach them how to treat others with kindness and respect, to respect themselves and the world around them. So try to 'turn that frown upside down,' so to speak, and focus your energy raising your son to be a positive, productive member of society, rather than worrying about all the ways society can hurt him. I know it's not easy, but work at it, and you will find it gets easier.
@angelface23 (2497)
• United States
5 Jan 08
I think it's normal to worry about those things but I think you are going a little overboard. Don't get me wrong- those are big issues but he is only 2. He has many years until he is a teenager. I know something could happen at any moment but I don't think a person can live like that- always thinking something bad will happen. Just try to live your life and just be happy that you have him.