marriage is it for you?
By bellaofchaos
@bellaofchaos (11538)
United States
8 responses
@Katlady2 (9904)
• United States
7 Jan 08
I am on my second marriage, and sometimes I think it is for me, and at other times I think it isn't. It is nice to have a significant other around for the companionship and the love, and of course, the bills. ;-) But when the stress of dealing with a husband that doesn't want to do anything on his days off from work, or deal with paying the bills, etc., that's when I think it's not for me. And then there are times that I think I am just too darned picky to be compatible with someone for very long.
3 people like this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
7 Jan 08
I have to agree with you on that at times I think I can tolerate marriage and at times I think that I can't .. My first one didn't go over to well.
Thank you for your response. By the way how are things going for you?
2 people like this
@skinnychick (6905)
• United States
7 Jan 08
I don't think it is for me. I had a bad one and since that I figure I don't need it. It seems to be much easier to walk away from a boyfriend and a bad situation- than to deal with the legalities of being married. I'm independent and don't really need anything from a man financially, basically it's just a relationship and who needs a piece of paper for that? I don't feel like many do- that if a guy loves you, he will marry you, sometimes I think it's the opposite. Marriage to me is just another piece of paper and red tape to go through if it goes bas- no thanks for me! :)
@skinnychick (6905)
• United States
7 Jan 08
LOL!!! I have to be serious some of the time- as long as there is no marriage in our threesome then all is goooddddd! :)
2 people like this
@cynicalandoutspoken (4725)
• United States
7 Jan 08
You don't have to be married to have a threesome. In fact I'm of the mind that such a thing could break up a marriage. I would comment on the discussion at hand but Skinny Chick already SAID EXACTLY what I would have written. I've only given in and agreed to marry again because my sweetie has yet to ever do it. Everyone should get the chance to make this life long mistake at least once. :)
2 people like this
@Lady_Vincy (1538)
• United States
8 Jan 08
I think marriage is right for me only if I find the right person to be married to. I am one who is willing to do everything for my future husband and if I'm willing to do that so should he. I would be a great wife.
2 people like this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
8 Jan 08
Lady_Vincy,
I'm sure you're goong to be a great wife and your absolutely right if you are willing to be there and do things for your future hubby then he should be willing to be there and do thing for you. I hope you find the man of your dreams and have a nice night and thank you for your response.
1 person likes this
@seagoddess28 (873)
• Canada
8 Jan 08
I was married once and the breakup produced so much collateral damage I am absolutely terrified of making the same mistake twice. I am glad I did have that first marriage because my children are my life, I would go through hell all over again just to have my kids. That being said, I have been in a committed relationship for 20 years now. We are soul mates and are in each other's pockets all the time. He has been asking me to make an honest man out of him for the last 20 years but I don't want to jinx it. So, I guess you can say that if you believe you are married and act married, you are married. You are considered married common law if you have cohabited for two years anyway. So, yeah, commitment is more precious than a piece of paper. I know personally of couples who are legally married but have no compunction "stepping out" with other folks, whether or not their partner approves. Have a wonderful day, beautiful bella!!! I think I'll go over to the Club now and get me a SeaBreeze I have had a really awful day.....
2 people like this
@seagoddess28 (873)
• Canada
8 Jan 08
Hey, you weren't babbling, beautiful bella!!! And isn't it cool we see absolutely eye to eye! !! Loungey, we have been downing Goodie's Gold all during happy hour, tee-hic! We're running out of Johnny W. what do you think we should do? See you at the Club....
2 people like this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
8 Jan 08
It's really great we see eye to eye. I have a problem sometimes what I could probably say in four sentences I say in about 50. I'm working on it .. Ahh but I need a drink and maybe we should send the prez out for supplies.
1 person likes this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
8 Jan 08
Honey, I'm sorry your having an awful day you ever want to talk I'm here for you. Let's go fix you that SeaBreeze and will make it a triple just for you hun. But I agree with you if you feel in your eyes your married your married. I have been living with my boyfriend for 6 yrs he has hit the ball around about getting married. But I have had an awful abusive marriage and I'm afraid that once that ring goes on it the personality will change and it'll be what I went through all over agian. When my sane mind tells me I won't go throught the same thing all over agian and marriage is just the natural and obvious next step and that we're that commited now and the red tape is just going to make official but still I have my reservations or what they call senseless fears. because even though I know my other half will never be physically violent or turn into my ex I'm still afriad of screwing up a good thing by taking the step. So I see where your coming from. Like I have said to another poster it's all about what works for you and what you feel comfortable with. Just because you don't have the red tape and certificate doesn't mean you don't take the commitment as serious. Some poeple that aren't married take it more serious than those who do. Take care and let's go get you a drink. Oh by the way sorry about my babbling.
2 people like this
@lovelydame3000 (1577)
• India
7 Jan 08
Yes, marriage is for me. I am the sort of person who likes to take responsibilities. I also think that a child should be born only on 'wedlock' and I definiel would like to be a mother soon.
2 people like this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
7 Jan 08
I hope you find the man of your dreams. I wish you lots of luck and love in your marriage when you do get married. Not to many people have those feeling any more. thank you for your response.
1 person likes this
@cartoon4umaniacs (1648)
• United States
8 Jan 08
In the beginning of time I didn't think that marriage was for me but after getting pass the first few years of bad/hard obstacles with hubby I know that it is what was meant to be and it's great...If I have given up on marriage then I wouldn't have known what true happiness is to be with someone who you can call your love...
2 people like this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
8 Jan 08
Cartoon4umaniacs,
It's great that you have found love and that you are happy in your marriage. The first years are hard and filled with obstacles. Congrats on getting past it and may love and happiness be with you always.
1 person likes this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
7 Jan 08
Thank you for your response. I respect that some of us just aren't built for it or at a current point in our life when marriage is an option. Have a nice day.
1 person likes this
@GloomCookieLex (6073)
• United States
7 Jan 08
I personally think that a committed relationship is a committed relationship, married or not. Marriage doesn't manifest commitment, it's just a jumpstart on legal benefits, a public show and a harder break-up if it doesn't end up working out. Too many people view marriage as some barbed-wire trap and even more seem to think it magicaly creates commitment out of thin air. Commitment is commitment, you don't need witnesses or legal contracts to make one.
1 person likes this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
7 Jan 08
that is very valid and i agree a commitment is commitment marriage or no marriage. but marriage is just more red tape. I have been with my other half now for 6 yrs and have not gotten married I'm just as commited to him without a certificate of marriage as I would be with one ..Thank you for you response I agree with you.
1 person likes this
