Should A Potential Relationship
By Rozie37
@Rozie37 (15499)
Turkmenistan
6 responses
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
15 Jan 08
Heck. I've always said, not only should you check someone out....you should ask them at least 100 questions before you make any decisions.
That goes for any kind of relationship - You never know what kind of people you are dealing with until you do.
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
15 Jan 08
Obvious, smobvious, Rozie...If they want to be in my life badly enough they will answer the questions. LOL
If they have something to hide, I want to know it up front.
1 person likes this
@teapotmommommerced (10359)
• United States
12 Jan 08
Rozie, I do not understand what you mean by that question. Do you mean do you want to know the the persons past who you want to date? If that is what you mean then by all means yes. I want to know if a person I am going to date has ever been put in jail for or been acused for child molestation, has murdered someone, or accused of murdering someone. I want to know what there past is before dating them. I do not want to date someone that may put me in harms way.
I say that but I am not an expert since I have been married to the same man for the last 30 years. We have been together now for over 31 years.
2 people like this
@34momma (13882)
• United States
10 Jan 08
if you mean should they check to see if that person has a record or bad credit, i would totally agree with you. The sad truth is sometimes even with that information people will still continue relationships. the need to be loved sometimes is so strong people will not listen to the little voice in their heads that says run!!!!
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
11 Jan 08
You are so right and it is so sad. This is why I have made up my mind to trust God and wait on him. No matter how long it takes. I do not want to spend my life trying to undo that kind of mistake.
I have learned from my older sister that very lesson. She saw the red flags and they were constantly pointed out to her when she didn't. I guess after she got pregnant with her fourth child she felt like she had no choice but to get married. I do not want that life for myself.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
10 Jan 08
I believe they should. You do not know who or what the person was before you started dating. He could have been an ax murderer for all you know. He could have had a whole lot of girlfriends who will appear on the Maury show, and say that he is the daddy. So it is best to find out about him so there are no bad surprises.
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
10 Jan 08
I seen shows where men have gone to a new state and change their identity and get married and start a whole new life, kids and all. Then thirty something years later, here is the police at your door telling you who your husband really is and dragging him off to jail for life.
Believe me, there is no need to go through this kind of drama any more. Pay the small fee and find out everything you need to know and go on with your life, with or without him.
1 person likes this
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
10 Jan 08
I think it pays to check them out before making a further commitment to them - I never did and luckily he checks out ok - you just don't know who you are marrying if you don't get the full facts :)
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
11 Jan 08
That is true. There are a lot of men, who will not tell you the whole truth up front. My aunt was married to this guy and they had two boys together, he already had a daughter from a previous marriage.
After he and my aunt divorced, he got married again. He did not tell this new wife that he already had three children, until after they were married. Everytime she told me that story, it just seemed so deceptive that a man would leave out something that important.
2 people like this
@vera5d (4004)
• United States
10 Jan 08
i joked with my husband that i needed to see two forms of id and a credit report before i would marry him - i knew he already passed the criminal background check because we worked together in a place that required one ;)
there are some things that are unimportant and then there are some things that if you plan on staying with a person for a long time you must absolutely know. credit is one of them, since you may end up wanting to buy a house or car or whatever later down the road.
This would probably freak out a lot of people dating casually - so if you are dating someone casually, be safe and always meet at a public place. As a relationship progresses though, I think it is fair that both people share their credit reports, a criminal background check, etc.
2 people like this
