Do you think ..a younger man can date an older woman...A relative of mine..

United States
February 3, 2008 4:49pm CST
A relative of mine asked me..who is interested in an older woman..if it's alright for the two of them to date? He is 31..she is 46.. Do you think their age is to great a difference.. I always thought men mature slowere then women..ha ..so that would really make the diference even greater..what do you think?
23 people like this
66 responses
@sacmom (14250)
• United States
4 Feb 08
Why should it matter? He's a grown man and she's a grown woman. So what if she is the older one? Age shouldn't matter between two consenting adults. Personally I prefer the man to be older, but that is my choice. :)
2 people like this
• United States
4 Feb 08
If I were searching: I would prefer the man to be more mature then myself..too..but not looking....;) I do know my cuz has someone he's eyeing and she is older by several years. Since he asked my advice and I know my inadequacy in this question I knew I could find help here on mylot.
1 person likes this
@sacmom (14250)
• United States
4 Feb 08
I'm not looking either, because I already found my older man LOL...he has been my husband for the past 13 years (well, it will be 13 years in a few days). :)
@teison2 (5923)
• Norway
3 Feb 08
Age does not matter much once you're past 20 something. Sure you'll change while growing older, but I do not think age is a huge factor in the sucess rate of relationships. If they love eachother and treat eachother with respect: go for it
2 people like this
• United States
3 Feb 08
so you are saying the traditional idea that if anyone older it should be the fellow ..really doesnt hold weight any more? My cuz is in love with someone older but asked me my thoughts on this.. I am really not too knowledgeable as.. I am not experienced in this.
1 person likes this
@teison2 (5923)
• Norway
3 Feb 08
I have several friends that are in relationships with younger men, and it sems to be working just fine. I think it has more to do with the type of personality they are than their age. To me age is just a number. It is not all that important. besides women usually live longer than men. This way she will not have to live on her own for many years at the end of her life.
• United States
8 Feb 08
Sure, an Older woman/younger man can work. I know people in that situation. It depends on how they interact/play off eachother. Also how mature the people are. Now, age is just a number, unless it's a minor and an adult.
2 people like this
@whyaskq (7529)
• Singapore
10 Feb 08
Well said, Valerieanne. I like the part - Age is just a number.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Feb 08
If Aston Kutcher and Demi Moore can do it so can he. LoL But seriously, once you are an adult age shouldn't be that much of a factor in starting a relationship. My sweetie is 6 years older than me and we get along great. My exhusband was 9 years older than me and he acted like more of a child then my 2 yr old did when I married him. If they get along well and enjoy each others company then age should be nothing more than a number.
2 people like this
• United States
3 Feb 08
Thanks..I will share this with my ..cuz.. who asked.. He asked my opinion..but am not very knowledgeable about what really works;)
@elemental69 (1562)
• Ireland
3 Feb 08
I dont think age matters in a relationship. They are both mature adults, so why not? There is the opposite age difference between me and my hubby, I am 31 and he is 44. As long as the couple in question are happy. :-)
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Feb 08
Usually it's acceptable if a man is older..from what I have been taught..but if you were the older and your hubby younger..do you think it would be alright.. Of course when I was asked this..I said I wasnt too sure..as I dont know too much about the dating business at all..LOL
1 person likes this
• Ireland
3 Feb 08
Maybe I am still old fashioned lol, but as long as the woman wasnt old enough to be his mother then it would be more acceptable. I dont think it would be right if he was in his early 20s and she in her 40s. I would tell our friend to go for it..... shes no hurting anyone.. :-)
1 person likes this
• Ireland
3 Feb 08
oooops sorry, he should go for it!!!
1 person likes this
@jhazie (340)
• Philippines
4 Feb 08
Hello, thats ok like my brother 35 then he married with 47 woman. if they love each other why not :)if your relative interested in older woman and they'll date,thats fine no worries. yes i agree with you men mature than women,love most important. compatibility next, not only in age differences. take care :D
• United States
4 Feb 08
HOw are they making out though?? I think a younger man would find it hard to take control as the head of household if he is younger..Is it the woman who must take on head of household then? I always saw the man as head of household..but if a man is so much younger how could he be?
@jhazie (340)
• Philippines
4 Feb 08
Hi again, not only the woman will take all responsibilities because shes old one no,they both good in business so they both help each other helping their children too. my brother is real good businessman :) while his wife work with real state anything so both very good business minded. its true that father is the head of the family but now :)its diff'rent now as you see. happy great monday!
@beinola (45)
• United States
13 Feb 08
I say GO FOR IT!!!!! Forget about the age thing. First of all, it's not a marriage proposal, it's a date. Just have some fun.
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Feb 08
it's not me you silly billy..if you read the intro....it's for someone who has asked my advice.. Being that I have no experience in the dating industry or the marriage one either..I brought the question to those I know must have some: mylotters;) I will relay your message, however.
@Thoroughrob (11747)
• United States
4 Feb 08
I do think a younger man can date an older woman. We had two couples at the grocery store that I worked at, and they were fine with it. You would never know that there was that much of a difference. If they get along and have alot in common, who cares. There are lots of worse things.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40312)
• Canada
5 Feb 08
My husband is younger than me, but I look younger for my years and for some reason he looks older than me, so sometimes the older woman does not look like the older woman and sometimes she does not act like it. It is all a matter of appearance. If you are a woman of thirty and you can do somersaults, why not marry a man who you are able to keep up with rather than one that you will have to push in a wheelchair when you are in your sixties?
@david2005 (800)
• Canada
4 Feb 08
I think that it doesn't matter how old that other person is as long as you both love each other and either one of you are under the age.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Feb 08
Hi: I don't think you read the question well..this is more generic and not the least personal ..it's a question brought up by my cuz who wants to know my thoughts ..I couldn't really advise on this matter since I am not on the dating game or scene.
@jhl930 (3603)
• United States
4 Feb 08
I don't know I have personally known people that have done that before(guys dated a woman considerably older than himself and it has worked out for them)I think that it is just the man that you are talking about because some men are more mature than other men....I don't see what the difference is because most people wouldnt question it if it were the guy that was 46 and it was the woman who was 31...I think that the mature part really depends on the man and how mature or immature he is!
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Feb 08
From my experience..not having dated though..men at 28 29 are still maturing..from those I have seen this age behaving..
@bonbon664 (3469)
• Canada
3 Feb 08
I think once both people are grown adults, the age doesn't matter. They find common interests anyhow. I think it's great they've found each other.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Feb 08
Don't you think though that men mature slower then women and that if there was a big age gap it should be the man older then the woman?
• United States
3 Feb 08
As long as they are both 18 and above, it shouldn't matter.Love is love.why should it matter the age of the people.What really matters is what they feel for each other. It doesn't matter what others think in the long run.Have you ever seen the movie All That Heaven Allows? It was made in the 50's but it is about a older widow who falls for a younger man.It stands up today.Rent it. It is a great film.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Feb 08
Never heard of the film..but perhaps I will tell my cuz the film..since it's him..who wants the info..I would not be too good in this field of advising..but since I was asked I told him I was ask around and let him know the common census..
1 person likes this
@whyaskq (7529)
• Singapore
10 Feb 08
In my opinion, age difference matters only to the couple. The general perception is that many prefer women who are few years younger so that their maturity level more or less matches. However, there could be exceptions. The younger man may have gone through much more and acquired the level of maturity equivalent to the older woman. Hence, if the couple is oblivious to the comments around them, they could be a perfect match :p
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (25135)
• Australia
10 Feb 08
Lets face it...anything goes these days. It's been accepted for a long time that the male is the older person in a "normal" relationship but times they are a changin'. These days its common to see a much older male with a much younger female and quite often there is the older female with the younger male. It depends on the individuals. I personally know a chap in his 30's whose wife is 67. Her mother lives with them too. She is 80 something. If two people are compatable physically, intellectually and spiritually then it should work. Who's to say these days what's right and what's wrong. In my own case, I had a run of partners, husbands and lovers who were alll 8 years younger than me. I became very bored with all of them. The experiences told me I need an older guy.
1 person likes this
@cobb1121 (126)
• United States
9 Feb 08
Everyone is different in their maturity level so it may just work. I am married to a younger man and it works out fine. Our age is never discussed or is an issue. Granted he is 3 years younger than me so the age difference is not bad at all. But I do have a friend who is dating a younger woman. He is 33 she is 23. They have issues in their relationship because of that age difference. They are in two different stages in their lives so it is hard to agree on certain things. So it does not matter if a man is older or the women their are going to be issues in a relationship what matters is if they are happy and can overcome their differences and build a solid relationship.
1 person likes this
• Pakistan
8 Feb 08
Love does not care the age difference. If male is younger than female. It means that the female is more expert than the male. She can teach him lot about the love affair. If man like her female than it is ok. They should carry on and enjoy their mutual understanding and their love with age difference.
@youless (104225)
• Guangzhou, China
5 Feb 08
Frankly, I think age is a big problem. Especially for an elderly woman with a younger man. It may be fine to for an elderly man dates with a younger woman. On the contrary, it will be a big difference.
@Galena (9120)
5 Feb 08
why would it be okay for a man to have a younger partner, but not the other way round?
• United States
4 Feb 08
yes, when i was 36 i dated a women with a 32 year old widow women..it freaked my mother out..lol..but she kept her self up and she had two very overweight daughters and an alcohoic son..but she was not a drunk and no overweight..but i was and she treated me very good..for awhile...and then she got jealous of everything i did ..and i had just gotten out of a bad marriages..and got tired of being under her thumb..so i broke it off..but she was nice to me ...and for that i am grateful...but i remarried at 40 to a women 33 but it all worked out for the best...as i learned from the past..and am still married and retired..but life is not always perfect and no marriage should be taken for granted...age is only a number
• United States
4 Feb 08
i ment to say she had a 32 year old son..i never knew her age..it must have been in the fifty's????i told her not to tell me..as it would spoil my illusion..lol but that was 1982 and i was brand new at 36
@ashnigam (96)
• India
13 Jun 08
Why not, if she is happy with it.
@profitsg (90)
• Singapore
13 Jun 08
Certainly it is possible for them to be together but firstly... There must be a good level of maturity among them. The guy must know what he is doing because by the time he hit 40, the lady will be well over 55 and might look pretty old. Just dont regret at that point of time. It is a deep level of maturity and love for each other for the relationship to hold and yes... Most guys mature slower but at 31 and you are still not matured, you are pretty slow.