handicapped parking and so called abuse
@Hatley (163781)
Garden Grove, California
March 22, 2008 8:33pm CST
mylotters when you see what is apparently a healthy person getting out of a car parked in a handicapped space do you think that person is cheating or do you even remark to the person that they should not be there?
the reason I ask is that I saw this apparently healthy looking man who had a handicapped sign in his car window get out of his car parked in a handicapped parking space. and another man accosted him and told him he was parking in the wrong place. the man said all handicaps are not visible from our outside appearance and what is your handicap? Turns out the man has COP and has a hard time walking very far without almost passing out. so there are a lot of people whose handicaps do not show up that easily.
5 people like this
16 responses
@creative_angel312 (390)
• United States
23 Mar 08
When I see a "healthy-looking" person getting out of car, I sometimes wonder what kind of handicapp they have, but I don't get angry or judge them. If they have a handicapped sign then the have a right to be there.
BUT, I also know that there are people who use there family or friend's parking sign. They may have an extra lying around somewhere and they give it to a non-handicapped person to use.
2 people like this
@kbkbooks (7022)
• Canada
24 Mar 08
You have touched a very tender spot for me. It's true that not all disabilities are visible, for example, there is a person around fifty who I know who is a veteran and has a handicapped parking permit because of "mental/emotional" disability. As much as I love this person, it kind of bothers me. However, this person served the country and I have a lot of respect for veterans and they don't get enough respect, so I don't bother to argue.
On the other hand, at a local store, I often find elderly, but mobile people, and even perfectly healthy younger people parking in the reserved spots without permits. This really steams me. I am just under 48 years old but have become progressively more handicapped physically over the past three years and driving and walking are very painful for me. I walk with a cane, and sometimes use a wheelchair. It took me two applications (about two years also) to get a permit as the government didn't think I was handicapped "enough"... what is up with that?
The other thing that really upsets me is that I have to pay a fee every two years for the government to process my application for renewal of my permit. Meanwhile, other people are parking free in most public parking lots. This really is unfair, but then no one ever said life would be fair, right?
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
26 Mar 08
it is so unfair when people cheat like that because they are afraid of getting cold or wet
@crazynurse (7482)
• United States
23 Mar 08
Hi Hatley. You bring up a very valid point about judging persons who have handicap parking stickers and use handicap parking places. Often what appears to be a very healthy individual is a person who has a handicap that is not visible. My hubby has had two total hips. He can walk, but not great distances. I have a lot of damage to my one foot, and despite wearing custom orthotics in my shoes, cannot walk great distances. Often, if we are having a 'good' day, we won't even take up a handicap space. However if one or both of us are having a great deal of pain, we will take advantage of our handicap sticker. I suppose we should never judge a book by its cover nor a human by their cover!
2 people like this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
Its so good you have the handicapped sticker as you never know when you might need it. We just should not judge anyone by appearance since they have the sticker and they are illegal and it is nobodys business what health complaint they have
1 person likes this
@coffeebreak (17798)
• United States
23 Mar 08
I have handicap parking because of knee replacements and can't walk for long distances. However, I do need some execise so sometimes if I know i won't be in the store long, I will park a bit farther out for the exercise. But as you said, some disabilities are not noticable - doesn't mean they aren't there. My problem is when they climb in and out of a huge full size, jacked up truck or hummer - if they can climb like that, what is their disability? Then again, a doctor has to give medical reason for requesting handicap parking for a person and the state approves it, so...
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
You do have a point there and you will wonder but if they have a handicapped permit there must be a reason. However I know a man who lives here in my apartment complex who is really healthy and does not appear to have any problems except one he borrows the handicap permit from a neigbor and sticks it on his front window and yes he does drive a huge truck thats jacked up and almost needs a ladder to get in and out of and he is much more agile than I am. I am handicapped with a brace on one leg and use a quad cane but I do not drive so have to impose on my friend who does and I am always joking when we have a hard time finding a parking spot she should get a handicap ticket and put it on her car so she and I can find a space but I was not at all serious. I can walk just takes me more time than others.
@coffeebreak (17798)
• United States
23 Mar 08
YOu can get one and use it as you see fit - I mean, like me, sometimes I do sometimes I don't. But I do use it when I go with others to places, As long as the person the placart is made out for is in the car, it can be in any car - any car you are in. So I take it with me at times. IF this guy that uses someone elses placart gets caught he is in big trouble and so it he person that let him use it.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
thats what I thought as they were both breaking the law I did not turn them in as I did not even know their names just knew them by sight.
@julievy (593)
• United States
23 Mar 08
I agree Hatley. You can't see what's inside the person. My spouse had a handicapped permit for a few weeks after his lung surgery this winter because he could not breath the cold for more than a minute or two, and it was hard for him to walk much without getting all out of breath.
He looked nice and healthy, but people couldn't see the incision that went half way around his chest! Thankfully, we're in a town with many, many handicapped parking places and no one gave him any hassle about it.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
Like I said so many people that have handicaps do not show any visible sign so do not judge them
@kbkbooks (7022)
• Canada
26 Mar 08
I don't think most of the time, people will gripe about it, as long as one has a legal permit. In my province, it takes quite a while to get a permit so I would be surprised to see someone get one for just a few weeks, also since we pay an annual fee. Your hubby was lucky that way. My son had lung surgery three times in the last year and they wouldn't consider him as handicapped, I am sure. Of course he was only 16, so he recovered pretty well, and fairly quickly. Anyway, I think it would be good if the system here in our province of Quebec were a bit reformed so the application process didn't take so long and didn't cost... that way people with temporary illnesses might also get preferential parking.
One thing that gets me is that there are now parking spaces for pregnant women and women with small children, marked as such, in some places. Funny thing, when I was pregnant I was always encouraged to get as much walking exercise as possible. When I had small kids, people used to beep at me if I took too long getting them in and out of car seats because I took up the extra space next to me with the open car door, even though it was pretty obvious I was tending to my kids. Whose idea were these new special spaces?? I don't think they are necessary. One place I go, there are more spaces for pregnant women and mothers with small children than there are handicap spaces!!
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
26 Mar 08
I have never seen parkingspaces just for pregnant women before but maybe they have not got to our area yet.
@fizzytom (752)
• Maribor, Slovenia
23 Mar 08
Another example of how non-visible disabilities can become apparent is with people with hearing problems. I have been in shops and noticed how sometimes the staff don't face customers when they speak to them. If you are a lip reader then how can you do this if the person talks to you but has their back to you? Quite simply a lip reader won't be able to unless you face them.
We should always bear in mind that anyone we encounter may have a hearing problem. And anyway, isn't it polite to face people when we speak to them?
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
this is so true and I am glad you brought this up as so many people do not think about the possibility that a customer has a hearing problem and we should fave the person we are speaking to
@Modestah (11179)
• United States
25 Mar 08
there was a time when I used to form opinions - or at least think - hrmpf I wonder what their handicap is... but over the years I am getting better to not rash judge like that. One thing that has helped in this regard is knowing people who do not have the ability to go distances - due to breathing troubles, blood troubles, cardiac troubles etc... all not necessarily visible to the casual onlooker. - doctor's are not in the habit to assign the placards frivolously.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
25 Mar 08
no that is true doctors really are very strict about issuing those placards. My own doctor I know turned one man down because he was really able just overweight a bit. no other problem and the doctor had really gone over his health.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
23 Mar 08
I will never again say anything to anyone in a handicapped spot ever again. That job will be left to the police as far as I'm concerned. Several years ago i worked in a place that had an adjoining laundrymat for which I was also responsible. A woman came in and told me that someone without a handicapped sign was parked in the handicapped spot and she wanted me to do something about it. Since no one was in the shop, I went over to the laundrymat and inquired about who owned the car. An elderly woman came up to me very irate. Her husband was seated nearby. He was very elderly and on crutches. He had taken a fall and they hadn't gotten their handicapped signs yet. I felt horrible and very embarrassed. Also like you said...some handicaps don't show.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
I feel for you and I am sure you were really embarrassed but some handicaps just do not show and it is best not to jump to conclusions although I imagine we have all done so at one time.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
25 Mar 08
Yes we do all make mistakes at times and I had mentally made the error of thinking this man really was not handicapped until I heard him breathe.
@crazed_moma (1054)
• United States
23 Mar 08
True, there are also people I know who give out their handi-cap hanger to others to use at the mall during XMas so they won't be inconvenienced by having to park really really far away....
IMO people should mind their own business though. I for one wouldn't feel the need to go question said person as they walked in to the mall. Maybe it's an embarrassing problem he/she would like to keep to him/her self!
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
25 Mar 08
That is so true and it would be so hard to know who was cheating and who really needed the advantage of a handicapped sticker.
@luvstochat (6907)
• United States
23 Mar 08
I am healthy but my mom is not when she goes to the mall with me we park in the handicap so she can make it to the door then sometimes I go and get the car and move it to the other end of the malll because she can't walk all the way back again if we walk to the other side so a perfectly normal person gets into a car parked in the handicap so you never know the story of why someone is parking in handicap.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
Exactly the point I was making as we do not know the story of the person who is parking in a handicap space and should not judge them at all.
@amesballa (32)
• United States
24 Mar 08
Well i personally think this is a horrible thing to do. If these people parking in the spots do it enough they will probably run across a old person struggling with every step to get to where they need to be and their conscience will get to them. So i think it is unnecessary to talk to the violaters because their conscience will eat away at them after a while.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
25 Mar 08
I have not seen those twoidiots for awhile so maybe they moved out or got caught using illegally the handicap permit.
@getunaddicted (210)
• United States
23 Mar 08
Looking at me most would not know that I have a variety of health issues that keep me from working normal jobs, I could get a handicapped tag if I desired it. The thing of it is I don't because I know I can walk a distance for the most part, there are times though I can barely move. This is a perfect example of Don't judge the book by the cover scenario.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
that is the same way with me I can walk a distance most times but I could get a handicap tag if I wanted to.
@enchantedleppard (1541)
• United States
23 Mar 08
Hi Hatley, I am a big advocate of not judging someone based on their appearance. I have 2 very good friends who do not physically look like there is anything wrong with them.. however they do have problems that prevent them from being "normal people" health wise. I know they have the same issues and it really bothers me because I feel that they shouldnt have to explain themselves to others. Its not other peoples business. Its very personal and people dont have the right to judge or accost someone else because of this.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
You are so right enchanted leppard people do not have any ritht to judge or to accost anyone over that issue. thanks
@karma118 (294)
• United States
23 Mar 08
It's very true. Did you know that even people with mental disabilites as "simple" as sever anxiety can be handicapped? Some people that are afraid of certain things like malls, or crossing the streets, they have serious phobias, are handicapped. It's strange to see someone young and healthy looking getting out of the handicapped spot but the truth is, like many situations, we don't know the whole story.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Mar 08
that was just what I was thinking without talking to a personwe have no idea what his or her real situation is.
