The Internet and Marriage
By bradhart
@bradhart (659)
United States
March 24, 2008 7:38pm CST
Is there anyone else here who is in a long term marriage 5 or more years with someone you met online? My wife and I met in 1994 on ISCA BBS through a mutual friend at the time. We never met until I got a job out this way and was sharing a place with another friend of ours until 1996. We were married in 1998. We still talk online to each other, even from across the room. It is a great way to share links now that we don't have just 1 computer (we actually have seven computers that work and are used which is two for everyone and one for my cat). It isn't always meaningful convo but atleast we talk and never are forced to listen to the others music. She can't seem to find the happy meaningful message in Zeppelin or The Doors (I am surprised surprised I married anyone who likes bubblegum pop).
Well here was the catch all. We have in the past couple of weeks seen some of our other online friends, those we talk to and those we don't and found that for the most part unless we opened a bottle of booze had nothing to talk about and then it was mostly about the internet. I keep wondering if we were the only ones who made it, that started out this way.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@jewelenterprises (1996)
• Australia
25 Mar 08
I met my partner online in late 1998. We were married in August 1999 (well, commitment ceremony since homosexual couples can't legally get married) and we are still together.
@jewelenterprises (1996)
• Australia
25 Mar 08
Thank you.
It's nice to see the growing tide of support for our rights among the heterosexual community.
Years ago I had the joy of marching in the gay pride march here in Melbourne, Australia... it was so incredibly uplifting to march through with thousands of people lining the road and cheering us on... VERY empowering :)
@bradhart (659)
• United States
25 Mar 08
I marched with some friends several years ago in San Francisco as did a lot of other straights and it was a blast. I think sometimes sometimes the parade and other flamboyant good times do more harm than they do good in the fight to be seen as normal everyday people that deserve the same kinds of rights as everyone else.
@Deea48 (1166)
• United States
25 Mar 08
I have a sister who has been married for 9 years now to a man she met on the net. They courted and then met in person, after a year of going back and forth he finaly moved here. Then they were married, they are expecting their 4th child right now. I know these relationships can work. Myself I have had a few internet relationships, just didn't stick is all.
Continued good luck to you and your wife. Relationships all take work, nurturing, I do not care how they start.
@bradhart (659)
• United States
25 Mar 08
It does take a lot of work, and you can't just base it on an online romance, or you really have nothing. We had known each other a long time before we started dating and spent more than a year together before getting married, which is far more than a lot of people who didn't meet on the net...
@ellisnew (6)
•
25 Mar 08
My brother met his second wife on the net about 5 years ago. They are still very happy with a 2 year old. He met his first wife in a more 'traditional' manner & it didn't work out at all well.
I don't think how you meet a person is that important, if it works then thats all that matters.
@hey_baby (425)
• Philippines
25 Mar 08
i have heared stories about two people meeting online, falling inlove and getting married. i feel its very romantic that way. most of the people i know are dubious about how long these relationship can last.
but i think the couples who are still together and going strong, proves them wrong and erases the doubt.
also, meeting in a traditional way doesn't guarantee that relationship would work. it all really depends on the people.
@bradhart (659)
• United States
25 Mar 08
It takes a lot of work to make any relationship work. My wife and I didn't start dating until we had lived in the same town for about 6 months. We had known each other and were friends long before then and had gone out a couple of times as friends before we started dating each other. Our whole online friendship was a few flirts and the admission it would be nice if we weren't a thousand miles apart. It was just luck that I happened to move close by for a job or it likely would have stayed in the flirting would be nice stage.
@mrsbrian (1949)
• United States
25 Mar 08
I met my now husband in a online game room and we chatted for about a year before we finally met, we lived about 700 miles apart.we met a couple times before we decided to move in together and well 6 years later here we are happily married still. i have a couple friends whom also met someone on line one is still married and the other is not, so i guess you never know. we have a computer room and 2 computers so we are together all the time but like you we still share things back and forth also we will use the messenger to have a chat with more than two family members . so in closeing you are not alone.
@janujennifer (664)
• Philippines
25 Mar 08
I am still single - but my last boyfriend is an American man whom I met online. We were together for 18 months - the longest relationship I have had non-stop. Online relationship worked for me as even if we don't see each other physically, we still chat everyday and comment in each other's blog post, but the thing that ended our relationship wasn't the fact that we were building a relationship online, it was our cultural differences. Still, I think, online relationships work.
