why is case of women only look is considered in most society, not quality?

@subha12 (18452)
India
March 27, 2008 1:54am CST
I have experienced this. in our society from childhood a children is judged by how fair the girl is or how beautiful she is. I faced this indiscrimination and also some elders in family used to say that. They used to compare me with other cousins who were fair and beautiful. She even told how beautiful hey look in certain dresses while I am not. I felt humiliated. They never considered how intelligent I was( atleast i was throughout topper, a rank holder in board exams and got gold medallist in university). But I am happy now as i have gone above all thse teasing and have a successful career. is it same in your society?
1 person likes this
10 responses
@dpk262006 (56734)
• Delhi, India
27 Mar 08
OH! You are a topper and Gold Medalist, I am really glad to know......I also feel lucky that a University 'Gold Medalist' is my friend. Yes, I quite agree with you that qualities of woman must be acknowledged and applauded. Women have some distinctive qualities, which men do not have. Looks are only temporary and will not last long. But qualities of a person will go a long way in her life. Also, looks can be enhanced through so many cosmetic surgeries and other things.
@subha12 (18452)
• India
27 Mar 08
thanks a lot for those comments. I think qualities should be the first point of consideration.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56734)
• Delhi, India
27 Mar 08
One comes to know about qualities in due course of time. And to me qualities are more imporant then anything else.
@deepti15 (1190)
• India
27 Mar 08
I think that men find looks more important then women!!!Look around you see very pretty girls with ugly guys all the time. She has found someone who makes her feel good about her self. Never puts her down. He is all about her. It isn't very often that you see a hunk with an ugly chick!! It would ruin there reputation with the guys.Most women really look at what is inside instead of outside. We look for someone who is gonna be the right one.Not just the next lay!! We look for someone who will treat us like a princess not just some ordinary female. All though some women may enjoy this. Great if you can find a guy with good looks and who has a good personality.A plus But in reality guys that look good tend to be as*hol*s and think of no one but them selves!!But the same can be said about pretty women as well. But I have seen decent looking guys with decent looking women who where total bitc**hes!! And you can't understand for the life of you why he would stay with such a horrible person. He is too worried about looks and what other people may say if he dated someone nice and a little less attractive. Look at Tv now days. Everywhere you turn the station there are half naked women all over it. And these women look as if they never had a child or wrinkle a day in there life. Tv is all about the women's body and looks. That is why we have so many sick women out there. So many eating disorders. Because we are letting hollywood and the tv tell us what they think all women should look like. You don't see very many adds for men like this???? They don't say men have to be buff, that there skin has to be flawless and soft, that they all have to be a certain size to be reconized. Heavier men are accepted better in society than heavy women. There are more older male actors then female actors. They get more parts. Women believe men get better with age where most men believe we shouldn't be seen. So In a man driven world you can see who truly judges on looks. Most men produce movies,TV adds, and so on and so forth. In the future I would love to see more women get control over these areas and exploit men they way they have exploited us. And see how they would feel if the roles were reversed. So to response to your discussion will be I believe that males judge more on looks than females!!!
@subha12 (18452)
• India
27 Mar 08
thanks for well thought long response. i completely agree with you. women are taken as something taht they have value if they look really pretty. No body look about the inner quality.
• India
27 Mar 08
deepti, what you are saying is right but not all men think like that. and one i would like to tell you that if you have the courage then don't talk take the initiative and try to change the things. but also i admit i like watching women on tv's but not really after them ... i do like to be with beautiful girl but i if i find someone who is good (in heart) no matter what i will accept.
@balasri (26549)
• India
27 Mar 08
Just lool at these most successful female celebrity millionaires in the world.I will disfigure myself to attain the glory of these ladies.The world has changed.Gone are the days where people fall for those coy grease painted ladies.It is brain and brain all the way Subha.Don't waste anymore time on looks.You are a beautiful smart friend .We know that. http://listverse.com/people/top-10-ugliest-female-celebrities/
@subha12 (18452)
• India
27 Mar 08
thanks for the psot and also the links. i have checked it. yes, there are so many not so good looking women and still who are successful.
• India
27 Mar 08
Looks do not matter. Yes . And don't worry if you are humiliated it shows they are narrow minded people and they should be ashamed of it not you. If you are a nice caring person then it matters ... but if you are a beautiful person with ugly heart then no one can bear that for a long time. Care only for those who understand you and supports you is what i learned in life ... there are few friends(or relatives) who really boost your morale ... love them and care for the. that's more that enough
@subha12 (18452)
• India
27 Mar 08
thanks for responsding.
@lishiwei (1553)
• China
27 Mar 08
Congratulations!Yes,it's the same situation in our society.I don't know why they consider the women by that.I also think that the men should all be considered by the intelligent.Because the perence can't be change but the intelligent can through your hard work study.
@subha12 (18452)
• India
27 Mar 08
yes, its same in most cases. I think society should change this attitude. it hurts many.
@muscare (3069)
• Australia
27 Mar 08
I think this is the same in most societies, and it seems that if you haven't got the right look, you have to work harder to get the same rewards. I think people should be judged on their merits, and intelligence should always be chosen over looks. Nice to hear you have overcome this in your childhood and made a successful career for yourself!
@subha12 (18452)
• India
27 Mar 08
thanks. actually it is the outlook the society sems not changing.
@lonely_f16 (2147)
• Philippines
27 Mar 08
Yes, I think no matter how society says that looks doesn't matter and all that. But cut with those crap, we know how physical looks matter to them. I even believe it's the only criteria they have on judging a person.
@subha12 (18452)
• India
27 Mar 08
i think its in most societies.thanks for replying.
• India
28 Mar 08
hi subha, very sorry to hear this, but it’s a typical phenomena round the world about beauty and in India we have the fairness factor added to it. I never faced any such discrimination coz none of us are fair in our family. We all have wheatish complexion and there’s no beauty in the family too (none of us are brainy like you). We are a very ordinary family from all sides with ordinary looks and complexion, so it was OK with me too. But yes, in school, college, office everywhere even now I see people gaping at fair (if not beautiful) girls and to be very frank, fair does look beautiful. Just the other day I came across an article which said that fair women were more preferred coz fairness is associated with purity and virginity while dark men were preferred coz darkness in associated with strength and virility! And in this age we are still carrying these notions and stigmas with us. I am glad that inspite of all these, you rose to become what you are today. Well done.
@NotaBene (111)
27 Mar 08
Looks can ultimately be just as important for men, but it's even difficult for us because apparently 'real men' don't take care of their appearance. What ridiculous socialized rubbish.
@heart143 (1204)
• Philippines
27 Mar 08
I think the outside beauty or appearance is just an added factor. It is but natural for people to admire or praise a beautiful person. When I was younger, I am so insecured of my physical appearance. My sister is far more beautiful than I am. She's always the center of attention in the family and has lots of suitors. Since I got lesser attention, I strived hard in my studies so that I will be noticed too. I won my case. I got their attention and felt more confident. When you are confident with yourself, you learn to love yourself. And when you love yourself, you become beautiful. Now, I'm not only beautiful (I believe so ), I have also achieved a nice life.