Parenthood/childhood
By treastrinity
@treastrinity (25)
United States
April 8, 2008 12:20am CST
I am a very overprotective parent, my children range from almost 11 years old, to just 6 years old! I had my first child at the ripe age of 16! I must first say, I think teenage pregnancy is completely unacceptable!! And it was never for me.. I actually never wanted to have children of my own. Until there was a baby that I knew was growing inside me. One family member wanted me to have an abortion. Although I don't "always" frown upon it, in that situation, it wasn't for me. I went through the pregnancy alone, only with my mother and two friends as my support.
I am putting this out there, just to let everyone know, that you can make your own right decision.
I finished high school 3 months before the rest of my class, with a 9 month old baby.
When my child was around 18 months old, her father and I decided to reconcile.
We have had two more children since. He was the one that was meant for me. I could'nt be more happy.
I think it is each persons own decision on weather they are ready to accept this situation. Weather it may be adoption, or something else. Im sure I may have some really terrible comments about this. I am just sharing my story. My story worked out, and I am living happily ever after. Not everyone does. And at the begining of this story I was no where near mature enough to dream of what I have today. I only knew what I felt........like I said,,,,,I NEVER wanted children of my own!
I just think a female knows what is right for her, that is all. I hope there are more happy, heartfelt stories out there.
2 people like this
5 responses
@GloomCookieLex (6073)
• United States
8 Apr 08
I have to say that, while your life works for you and that's great, I'm slightly offended by your emphasis on saying how you didn't want kids but you've had three. It almost seems like you're trying to cheapen other women who "just say" they don't want kids.
What I don't fully understand is why, if you were so adamant about "NEVER wanting children", why you had one, then two more? You say a woman knows what's right for herself, but you "knew" you never wanted kids, but then you had them. I'm sorry, but I don't fully understand the motive of this post.
1 person likes this
@treastrinity (25)
• United States
8 Apr 08
Well, I knew people would feel offended. I was an only child, I never had siblings. So, I did'nt know anything about babies, or children. Period!! I am just trying to show a point that, yes teenage pregnancy is "THE WORST", sometimes it works out. Not always, actually, its very rare! After knowing that I was going to love my first child, at the young age of 16, after that, I was a mother forever after. How can anyone not understand that? I was only between 13-16 when I made the decision I didn't want children.I think you need to read more into it hun! As an only child I did'nt know anything about children or siblings, but I have turned out to have the best family ever. Maybe I did'nt put that right across right. My point was, weather it is a miscarriage, abortion, dont matter, I feel that a woman knows what she feels. Some people will blow all of these things off, as if they have no feeling. I am pointing out, that there are feelings all around where a child comes into your life! Weather you are a teenage/child or not! I never had any instincts.........somehow I found them....I was trying to show people there is hope. In whatever decision they make. I am sorry you feel so confused.
2 people like this
@GloomCookieLex (6073)
• United States
8 Apr 08
I'm not "confused", nor did I not read far enough into it. You never said you were an only child and that the extent to your "NEVER wanting kids" was a standard adolescent aversion to responsibility, not an actual life decision.
I decided I never wanted kids when I was 3. I decided I never wanted to go though childbirth when I was 5. I reaffirmed my decision at age 16 when I met my fiance. I'm almost 21 years old, I'm getting married in 7 weeks and I m even more adamant about never wanting children. I'm even looking for a doctor to sterilize me. I don't like kids, I don't like being around kids, I never want to have kids. Period.
It seems to me like you're cheapening my and other women's decisions to never have kids by saying you didn't want them but you changed your mind and life changes when you have kids as though everyone will have kids.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
9 Apr 08
gloom you should really respect this posters opinions and not chastize her for having them. I am sure she wont do that to you. it is your right to decide youwill no have kids and it is her right to change her mind and have her baby and have more children as that was right for her.what is not to understand?
Is she is posting to show other young teens that they can make their own choice and their own way do not deny her that right.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
9 Apr 08
Good for you you stood up and accepted your pregnancy and raised your child yourself with a little help. it is so easy to abort and of course some have really valid reasons to abort, but to same your child and go ahead and finish uyour education is a real accomplishment. I am glad that you and the baby's father reconciled and went on to have other children. I hope you do not get any really terrible comments about this You mayjust help another teenage girl who is in the same situation to make a wise choice for herself. You sound really happy now and have a great family.
@treastrinity (25)
• United States
10 Apr 08
Thank you for all the support! In no way am I saying that my feelings for not wanting children were immature! I did not like kids at all. I would go to my best friends house,,,,a family of 6 kids, and I would be disgusted! I didn't want anything to do with the brats!! They made my feelings even stronger about not wanting kids. I dont know why I would dare to explain myself to someone so close minded. My point is, unless you have ever felt that little something that some people really do feel when they are pregnant, you have no reason to judge anyone!! Period! Even after my first child, I was in the very mature mind set, that I did not want anymore kids, and I also took mature steps against it. It doesn't matter! I also never told anyone my past, weather there were pregnancy's in between or not. So you can't just go saying that because you don't want children, you won't have them. I am just trying to give a few girls out there an open mind. Everyone talking these teens into abortion, (which I am not against so much), and adoption. I am trying to tell my story, and give a few girls hope. Not trying to contradict myself or anyone!
@Sweettatas01 (443)
• United States
2 Jun 08
Im two month's behind hehe but oh well these last forever ^^ or just about. I have to say that your story is very touching, and I feel that you are very lucky that it is going so great for you!
And what's funny, I grew up with older siblings and I didn't want kids. I made that decision when I was in my teens... but I also had the influence of my brats for cousins. lol I do not like spoiled rotten children. So as I got older I came to the conclusion that I just didn't like other people's kids, for the most part. :D Now if they are sweet and respectful, thats another story of course!
But it is possible to change your minds, as well as it is for every other girl that had themselves convinced that they do not want kids. I want kids now. I want 2! Young women who decide that they want kids, they will never know what they truly want until they feel a baby growing inside. The pregnancy is a beautiful thing, there is NOTHING like it in the world. Everything that happens to you when you are pregnant is magical almost. Your attitude, your instincts kick in... you grow into a better you. Humans are meant to produce, and now that I've grown and matured... I understand that I want that experience in my life. And you know, some girls I feel are oblivious to the things that they really want.
I love your story, its a true fairy tale. I wish that all teenage pregnancies would end up like that.
@dragonfly242 (1060)
• Bahamas
29 May 08
I was a teenage mom, and i understand where you're coming from.
When i found out i was pregnant i was terrified and hid it for five months.But i had no doubt that i would have the baby, abortion was never an option for me.
Dont get me wrong I dont look down on anyone that makes that choice, i believe a woman has a right to free choice.
I'm now the mother of six ranging from the ages of 22 to 10 and the grandmother of one.
For me the choices i made were the right ones, because my family completes me.
@icecandies (154)
• Philippines
18 Jun 08
Hey continue being happy with your family. Someday we'll all get old and other people won't love us the way our kids will. Continue loving them and be happy with your life and I'm glad you know what is best for you.
