i want to get married already.........

sad - Another sad face.
@marababe (2511)
Philippines
April 8, 2008 5:57am CST
I think I'm feeling another "down" moment. My high school friend just gotten married 2 days ago and something inside me, a teeny tiny part of me is jealous. By the way, I'm turning 21 this June. Huhu! I want to wake up with someone, go home knowing that I'll be sleeping beside someone, someone I can constantly talk to and share things with. But there are 2 problems. First, I don't even have a boyfriend and second, I have to earn money for myself first. I promised myself not to get married unless I have already earned enough money for me and my mom and brother. Am I going crazyyyy?
19 people like this
72 responses
• United States
8 Apr 08
I can understand if you're feeling a little jealous because you're friend has someone and you don't. However, that's not a good reason to get married. Plus, you are really young, so you probably don't even know what you really want in life. I would suggest for you to do the things you have always wanted to do in life. Now is the time! Do things for you! Enjoy your youth, have fun! And in due time, you will meet someone, and then that will be a whole different learning experience. So... baby steps. :)
1 person likes this
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
9 Apr 08
Thanks candiec2005! You got me there. I honestly don't know what I want exactly in life except to give my mom and brother everything my dad would've given us when he was still alive. Yeah, I'd definitely do that baby steps!:)
1 person likes this
• United States
9 Apr 08
There you go! I wish you the best of luck :)
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
10 Apr 08
Thanks again! :)
1 person likes this
@Darkwing (21588)
8 Apr 08
No, you're not going crazy. It's just a stage of life you're going through. Your idea about working and accumulating a bit of money first is a sensible one. I know there's not much I can tell you, but you'll learn as you go along. Whilst you're earning this bit of stability for yourself and your family, you could go out on casual dates, or with a group of friends, and generally have some fun, before you settle down. Good luck, my friend. Brightest Blessings that you enjoy your adult life. Take care! x
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
9 Apr 08
Thank you darkwing! I know I'll have fun and enjoy my being single while I still am. Cheers!
@Darkwing (21588)
9 Apr 08
Good for you... Have a happy life, and thank you! x
@apsara60 (6611)
• Israel
8 Apr 08
Please don't think that marriage is the best thing in the world ........you can have a boyfriend, but concentrate more on the promise that you made to yourself.......you are absolutely right.....be independent first........be capable of looking after yourself and your parents.....there are lot of things that you can do before marriage which you will never enjoy after marriage, so do it.....go for world tour have fun and only then fall into this mess, called marriage........but in the end do get married and have kids.....kids are fun.....and so is hubby(sometimes)........Have a nice day.
1 person likes this
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
8 Apr 08
Haha! Thanks apsara60! :)
1 person likes this
@apsara60 (6611)
• Israel
9 Apr 08
• Philippines
18 Apr 08
Babe, I understand how you feel. I recently felt that, too. See, I have this friend, his name is Jeff (not his real name). He's my college buddy, and it so happened that his house is just thirty minutes away from mine. His wife recently just gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. I am the baby's godfather, and every time i see her, i just can't stop thinking about what my future would look like: me, kissing my wife before going to work, and carrying my baby for a while, then kiss her, and then... well, the daydreaming goes on and on. Still, it is really too early for us to dive into that next phase of our lives. It's not bad to think ahead, though. So keep it up! Continue dreaming so that when the time comes for you to have a family, you now more or less have an idea on what to do with it, since you already have pictured it in your mind. :) With that, you'd be so much fulfilled and happy. :)
1 person likes this
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
24 Apr 08
I kinda know who you're talking about da ha. Anyway, thank you! And don't worry, we'll all have our own families in due time. (i hope!)
@theprogamer (10539)
• United States
16 Apr 08
Be patient Mara... I can understand some of how you feel. It'll take time to get to what you want, but patience can help here. You have to go out and try to solve the first problem though. The second problem will also require patience and hardwork. Hoping for the best with your situation.
1 person likes this
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
24 Apr 08
Thanks theprogramer! I know patience is a virtue. LOL. I just can't seem to feel sad and have thoughts every now and then. Cheers!
@sunshine4 (8707)
• United States
9 Apr 08
You are not going crazy, it is just a thing that girls go threw when their friends get married and you aren't even dating anyone. You are still very young. Persue a career. You will meet the right guy and when you do, you'll know it. Take your time~ live your single life to its fullest. I always tell my kids that they shouldn't even think about marriage until they are at least 30. I was married at 24 and missed alot due to having that husband and children.
1 person likes this
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
10 Apr 08
Thanks for that advice, sunshine4! :)
@jarred (177)
• Philippines
9 Apr 08
nahh you aint crazy. i felt that so many times too when i attend marriages of my friend. anyways 21.. good age but could have been better if youre around 24 25 , but thats your life :) goodluck with everythinng. time will come for you. just wait :)
1 person likes this
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
10 Apr 08
Yeah, it pays to wait right? Thanks jarred!
• United States
8 Apr 08
I wouldn't say that your going crazy but what I will say to you is slooooooooow down! You are so very young and have your whole life in front of you. I don't blame you for wanting someone to call your own, not wanting to be lonely. I mean, who wants to be all alone right? I am saying to take your time; do what you have to do for yourself first. Sometimes it's a blessing being single. I am sure that you are a beautiful, intelligent young woman that any straight manwould love to be with. Some things are not to be rushed and this is one of them. Take care!
1 person likes this
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
8 Apr 08
Awww. Thanks for that! Really appreciate it. Cheers!
@subha12 (18452)
• India
8 Apr 08
i think you are ready to gt married. may be you are feeling this as your friend got married, may be the idea making you crazy to be with someone. high time find the mate.
1 person likes this
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
8 Apr 08
LOL. That's another problem. I'm really not looking and I'm not really doing anything to be found. Hahaha! I'm cool just being with my friends (which are mostly guys) and I think that sorts of scares other guys away. Cheers!
@rhane7315 (5670)
• Philippines
18 Apr 08
i guess you're too young to get married. at least enjoy all the things that you wanna do in your life first because when you're already committed to a person that you love, you cannot do those things anymore
1 person likes this
@banunche (259)
• Philippines
18 Apr 08
you need to be prepared both emotionally and financially =) "someone who would sleep with you and be there when you woke up" ..marriage is not all about that.. its not easy to get married..
1 person likes this
@DavidReedy (2411)
• United States
15 Apr 08
Don't feel bad. It seems weird, but I think it's a part of our biological/genetic drive. I'm experiencing something like it myself: I'm single, my experience with relationships has been horrible, yet, I've got this overwelming desire to be a father. It's nuts. But, maybe it's natural? David
@vicozzio (45)
• Indonesia
13 Apr 08
Hmmm... why don't you believe that God have created plan for you? every human being have their own problems... my fiancee now is 27 years old, and she still have much more problem then yours & cannot accept marriage yet... you only 21 and feel your problems is so big... just one suggestion... pray alot, ask for the best way for you... :D
1 person likes this
@yourkl (585)
• China
13 Apr 08
different person different thought.As a man work is first. and good luck to u.
1 person likes this
@sona22 (1430)
• India
13 Apr 08
I pray to almighty to give you such stamina, power and will to fulfill your dream. Yes, most of us after a certain age dream to wake up, sleep, talk, love to someone special. If you wish you can use me as a referal for your earning site. If I do something I shall be happy.
• United States
11 Apr 08
Don't fret. There is plenty of time to find the right person.Suggestion.Keep doing the hobbies you like to do and look around and see if there anyone you may like doing the same hobby.I think your promise is great.And no, I don't think you are crazy.I know you will find your soulmate And make enough money for your family.
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
11 Apr 08
Aww. Thanks for that sarahruthbeth22! A promise is a promise right? Whether it be to others or yourself. :) Hug!
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Apr 08
Yes a promise is a promise.
@crazeMD (196)
• Philippines
9 Apr 08
hi marababe. :) i don't think you're going nuts. it's completely normal. i do feel those too esp during weddings. it's every girl's dream to find that special person we can spend the rest of our lives with. i am turning 27 this october, no boyfriend and still have to start a job. in short, my case is a bit worst than yours. so cheer up girl. it's not the end of the world. pray for that special one instead. he'll come in God's perfect time. :)
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
9 Apr 08
Aww thanks crazeMD! Goodl uck to both of us! I also need to find a job now if I want to make it to my target of completing my goals by age 26-27. :)
@crazeMD (196)
• Philippines
10 Apr 08
thanks mar! :) the best of luck to both of us! :)
• Italy
8 Apr 08
had you never a boyfriend ? i can't believe . In your photo you seem so pretty !
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
9 Apr 08
I had 2 boyfriends but right now -- well, for the past 2 years -- I'm single. Boohoo! Thanks darthtony! :)
• Italy
9 Apr 08
the right man is hidden behind a tree qaiting you. You are really prett, you'll find easily and you'll make him let his hiding !
@jesbellaine (4155)
• Philippines
8 Apr 08
No, you are not getting crazy. You just set your priority that is why you don't have a boyfriend yet. Maybe, you are working too hard for yourself and your family, you may have not noticed that someone likes you or want to ask you out. Well, have time for yourself, meet new people then maybe, you'll meet your guy. You don't have to be married right away, get to know each other first then if you are both ready then that's your call... :)
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
9 Apr 08
LOL. The only guys that always ask me out are my friends. And I'm sad to say that I'm currently unemployed. Boohoo!
• Philippines
10 Apr 08
Who knows... remember, friendship can turn into love! Happy posting!
8 Apr 08
How long was your friend with her partner before she married him?? You dont need to get married to have someone to wake up with, have someone to sleep next to, or talk to. Your young, get your life in the direction you want it to go. Enjoy your life while you can, go out and enjoy being single. You always find someone when you least expect it. Dont go rushing to the first bloke that shows interest though as you dont want to seem eager. Im 27 in August and have been with my boyfriend who's nearly 31 for about 4 years. I joke with him telling him that I wont marry him til Im 40, too many people I know that got married have also got divorced. My twin brother got married last year, felt weird not reaching a milestone together but I'd rather have children than get marrried.
@marababe (2511)
• Philippines
8 Apr 08
Hi cinderella2007! Of course I wouldn't go rushing to someone who shows interest. I'd get to know him more. Plus, I really want to reach my plans for my future before settling down. I don't know, maybe I'm just losing my mind. LOL. Anyway, my friend and his boyfriend have been together for almost 4 years now.
• United States
9 Apr 08
Yeah, you don't need to rush into anything as serious as getting married, in my opinion that is one of most important decisions you will ever make in your life. I have a friend that is 22 yrs. old, and she was in a hurry to get married and start having kids, I asked her why does she want to do that now? She's young and still has her whole life in fromt of her. She now has a boyfriend, and I'm thinking that pretty soon now, she'll be telling me she's getting married. I myself don't think ppl should get married till their a little older, like in the late 20's. Theres too many divorces happening these days. I myself waited to get married till I was 31 and my husband was 39. We had a short engagement tho, 4 mos. we just celebrated our 5th anniversary, and things are going good..I think some ppl are marriage material and some aren't, just depends on who you are...take care