What do you consider cheating on your Spouse/ boyfriend, girlfriend

United States
April 8, 2008 6:14am CST
So what is it to you that would constitute that your other half is cheating. What things do you overloook? What things will you not tolerate in a relationship? Do you think internet flirting is cheating?
1 person likes this
7 responses
@tessah (6617)
• United States
8 Apr 08
i havent got any problem with my man flirting, cybering whatever online. or even hooking up with another girl and sleeping with her. but if he hides it.. lies to me. thats it. lying = cheating.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Apr 08
All I can say is wow.. I would think you would have more respect for yourself..alllowing your husband to do such things makes you appear not to care about the committment made at marriage.
@tessah (6617)
• United States
8 Apr 08
actually.. it shows quite a bit of respect for him and myself. he isnt a peice of property. i dont own his heart, nor him mine, and i dont dictate what his emotions are. if he feels something for another ( or i do ) , so be it, it doesnt make what he feels for me, or me for him, null and void, nor does it negate our commitment to each other. no one is saying you have to understand my marriage.. nor is anyone saying you have to have the same in YOUR marriage.. but to say we are wrong for ours, or that we dont love each other, is wrong. youre clueless.
@tessah (6617)
• United States
8 Apr 08
oh i am pefectly calm and serene sweetheart. now im flirting with you ;wink; but you knew that too.
@kezabelle (2974)
8 Apr 08
The way I look at it is this, think aboout your spouse flirting online how would it make you feel if the answer is hurt and upset then yes its cheating. Some people are more tolerant than others, i forgave my partner for cheating he was only messaging women online still hurt like hell though and I would class it as cheating. I dont have a problem with him talking to other women but when it becomes a secret and means he has something to hide thats cheating on me its lieing to me and breaking my trust. I wont tolerate any cheating in our relationship and he now knows this although sadly it took him almost losing all of us me and our kids to make him realise.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Apr 08
You are right ..cheating always sticks out like a scar on the relationship..even though it has been forgiven and healed..there is always the reminder that stays around like a scar..Love can cover it over like makeup on women..but it's always there.. ..
@kezabelle (2974)
8 Apr 08
Yes its hard to forget I think the key is not throw it at him any time we might fight it would simply destroy us and I think we are worth more than that. He was and is sorrier than he could even begin to put into words he cried when i told him to leave and thats when I knew I couldnt make him go, I didnt see the point in hurting either of us anymore than we allready were.
1 person likes this
@kezabelle (2974)
8 Apr 08
Thank you x
1 person likes this
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
8 Apr 08
What would be considered cheating to me? Hiding it..Sleeping with someone else or cybersexing etc and NOT telling me about it...Bottomline thats what i wont tolerate..DON'T EVER LIE TO ME...I can't stand it and will walk away from anyone for being deceiptful, lying etc etc...I have zero tolerance for that..
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Apr 08
You are so right..there is so much need for honesty for the success of a relationship...Of course the obvious is sleeping with someone else..others, don't see the cyber stuff just as much cheating as the real stuff.. Thanks for sharing.
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
8 Apr 08
Thats just it...I dont care if he sleeps with someone else..He's more than free to..what I dont tolerate is LYING or HIDING it from me...
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
9 Apr 08
YES! YES! YES! internet flirting to me is cheating too. telling people you love them over the internet when you are attached is a big no no for me. its cheating. how can you admire other people and still say you are faithful to your wife, or GF? i will definitely not tolerate that. If i ever caught him cheating on me in every possible means, texting, office flirting, internet flirting.. etc.. we are over. i have no tolerance for such a person who can't seem to know what he wants in life and trying to accumulate girls in his list... there are those who will be faithful and will have attention only for me.. why bother on someone who wastes his time on others and make you believe you are his world? i hate liers.
• United States
10 Apr 08
very well said makes perfect sense....it just seems our generation is packed full of liars and cheaters though.....its hard to find someone honest and faithful now days
@subha12 (18441)
• India
8 Apr 08
in infatutaion you tend to fall for that person but still not there. its the start of the good feeling but you are not sure whether you have still reached there or not. its something that makes you happy but not mad in love.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Apr 08
so you think the mere emotional feeling for another person when you are married is cheating? can you elaborate a little more on this?
• United States
8 Apr 08
I agree..hiding things...is definitely the true fire starter for jealousy and broken relationships.. Honesty, openness, talking, communicating..this will always help to keep the relationship together.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
8 Apr 08
sorry it was for another discussion. i ;posted it wrong. according to me chaeting would be when the partner does so many things behind my back that can hurt me if i know them. if he still into some other raltionship and hides me.
1 person likes this
@jarred (177)
• Philippines
8 Apr 08
i dont think internet flirting is cheating.. well at some point yeah . but it doesnt show any love . maybe something more than flirting would consider cheating. but sexy talk online isnt much of a cheating.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Apr 08
I see.. so you would have no problems with your significant other flirting with people on line either.. right?
@abby0210 (95)
• United States
8 Apr 08
I consider a physical relationship with someone besides me obviously cheating. I do think there are degrees of emotional cheating too. We all flirt once in a while so I don't necessicarily constitute that as cheating but if I found out my husband was doing this on-line or with someone that I didn't know I would be very hurt. My trust in him would probably be jeporadized because we share almost everything with each other - we are each others best friends. I guess sometimes the circumstances play a big part. Luckily this is something that I don't think I will have worry about for the time being.