So mad...update on the house...family backstabber
By foxyfire33
@foxyfire33 (10005)
United States
April 11, 2008 12:08pm CST
Ok, I'm just going to warn you all that 'mad' does not even come close to how I'm feeling right now. I previously posted about how we had finally found a house. It fits the budget and the family and I fell in love with it immediately. We have started the buying process with the bank and having been hoping it all worked out. We knew there was a risk that someone else would be interested in the house and that they might be a little further along in the home buying process but that's just how it works and we could deal with that.
A few nights ago I was talking to s/o's cousin...now to really understand why I'm so pi$$ed you have to understand that this is the ONLY family member we are at all close with on that side. We have helped them out so many times and been there...as he has done for us. Well, he called because as usual he wanted to know if we wanted to buy or rent their crappy 2 bedroom trailer in a trailer park because they wanted to move ASAP...like they've been saying for months. I said no, actually we are trying to buy a house ourselves. I told him where it was, how big it was and how excited I was about it...and he knows my frustrations about living here so he knows this house is everything that s/o and I need.
Well...I talked to him again today. He wanted to tell me that they too have found a house (and again offered their crappy trailer to us). His father in law is willing to put up the down payment and co-sign the loan if necessary plus help with the repair expenses. Then he told me about the house....
It's OUR house! The one I'd just told him about. He fricken turned right around after I told him about it and called the real estate agent and set everything up with his father in law. So know while we're still get things approved they'll get to just steal it right out from under us. And the really sucky thing about is...his wife can be such an immature little_________ that I know this house won't be good enough for her once she lives there for a little while. So a year or two from now she'll want to move again and they'll list it for more than we can afford. And even if we can afford it, she'll probably have changed everything I love about the house because we definitely do not have the same taste in decorating.
So now it's going to be like a race between us to see who gets it first and we're already way behind them. I just can't believe they would knowingly do this to us. I don't even think I could stand visiting them there if they get it...it was right for us, in my mind it was my house and that's all I'll think about when I'm there.
I never expected him of all people to just stab us in the back like this.
11 people like this
22 responses
@Sissygrl (10912)
• Canada
11 Apr 08
That sure is f'ing rotten!! I hope you get the house instead foxy, but if you dont, and you find a new house thats even better, then you can rub it in their faces like LOOK WHAT YOU WOULD HAVE come across had you not bought that first house up so fast!! good things come to those who wait right.. try to look at the bright side. . like i said maybe something EVEN better will come along. . this sort of happened with my mom when she was buying a new house after my parents split. We viewed a home in an open house and we all LOVED IT, it was awesome! and someone else, although not a family member bought it first :/ I loved that house so much. . but we found a house that was even better! close to my nan too!
1 person likes this
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
11 Apr 08
Oh, I know. THat's what I keep thinking too...if this really is the right house for us it will happen, if we don't get this house it means it really wasn't the one for us. The housing market around here is just so hard right now...either they are way too expensive or they are cheap but beyond repair or super small. They can afford more than we can, they aren't well off but they both have jobs plus a small home business...and at least they have a place of their own right now even if they don't like it very much.
2 people like this
@Sissygrl (10912)
• Canada
11 Apr 08
i hear that. We have been looking.. well i have been looking.. mostly for fun right now and to get an idea of prices and stuff.. wow. its hard to find anything ideal under 200,000 here. ouch. except mobile homes. which would be okay.. as long as it where not in a trailor park. lol. i cant allow myself to live in a park. that's wrong on so many levels.
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
13 Apr 08
I doubt that he/she would be my cousin anymore after that. That's dirty and low to do that to family. I hope you're able to get it before them, and if not, that's ok, don't stress too much over it as there will be a better house for you and your family.
@angelface23 (2494)
• United States
11 Apr 08
wow. that is so dirty! I don't even know what to say about that! I probably wouldnt even have told them about it in the first place.
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
11 Apr 08
Yeah, I guess I shouldn't have...I just thought I could trust him as close as we all are plus I was tired of him asking us to buy his place. I know we're desperate for a place of our own but his place is a bit beyond the level I would sink to to get out of here.
@Modestah (11179)
• United States
12 Apr 08
that is so bizzare! what are they thinking? and then to have the audacity to offer the trailer as to rub it into your face,,, yeah right I'd take the trailer, no WAY!
is the guy having some mental difficulties, did he not know that you told him about the house? have you confronted him about it?
if it was on purpose, I do not think I could express the proper words about what I feel of this man!
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10534)
• United States
11 Apr 08
O_o
Speechless Foxy... I mean I could predict the main part of the story, but still speechless that it actually happened. I hope you and your other are able to get the house first, by some event, work, process or miracle. What the cousin did to you was so underhanded.
1 person likes this
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
11 Apr 08
Thanks pro...underhanded is a good word for it. "by some event, work, process or miracle"...it may take all 4 but I suppose that will make the house even that much more special to us.
1 person likes this
@lilybug (21107)
• United States
11 Apr 08
What a sneaky little B! I would be beyond pissed off as well. That is a horrible thing to do to family. And calling you to tell you about it is just like a slap in the face. I will be keeping my fingers crossed that it all gets messed up for them and that you guys still get the house.
1 person likes this
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
11 Apr 08
Sneaky is right! And I know he knew it was the same house because I'd told him everything about it and there are only 2 houses currently for sale in that town and the other one is over $100,000 so there's no way we'd be trying to buy that one. And then he calls and acts like he had no idea...ugh! Right now I'm hoping that he loses his job again or something as bad as that sounds...I want this house, or at least don't want them to have it to rub in my face all the time.
1 person likes this
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
11 Apr 08
What kind of BS is that! Did you put in an offer yet? I would do it ASAP to make sure you do get the house before they do! I wouldn't talk to them ever again, regardless of who ends up with the house. I hope you get it to rub their face in it!
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
11 Apr 08
When are you going to prequalify? A lot of place will do that over the phone.
Did they actually put in the offer?
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
11 Apr 08
No we haven't made an offer and that's what's stressing me out so much about this.
See our plan up until this house got listed was to just find a place to rent while we built up our down payment a little more because we figured we wouldn't find a house for under $60,000. Well this house listed for 32,500...so we almost have the down payment but we hadn't bothered to get prequalified for a mortgage because we thought we were a long way from that point. That's what we've spent this whole week doing because the agency won't even let us look at the house until we're prequalified.
But THEY have her parents money behind them so if needs be her parents can just buy it and then wait for them to get a mortgage themselves. And yeah, I'll have a hard time speaking to them...unless of course it's to invite them over to MY house so the kids can play and have room to run around since they can go more than 10 feet in their trailer without running into a wall or furniture...
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
11 Apr 08
Hopefully as soon as s/o gets home today. They needed to speak with him in person before they could do the credit check and his work hours ran over just enough this week that he didn't get home in time. Today is supposed to be a normal day though...so we should know within the hour.
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
14 Apr 08
I can't believe that he has done this to you either that is so terrible I think you have been through more then enough you did not need this at all
I really hope that you will still be getting the House I really do
And I hope that you will never trust him again I still can not believe that your own Family has done this to you
@terri0824 (4991)
• United States
11 Apr 08
I can understand your frustration with this situation. Family shouldn't do that to family.
The only comfort that I can give you is put it in God's hands, and his will be done. If you get it then it was his will, if you don't then he has something better in store for you.
@guss2000 (2232)
• United States
18 Apr 08
oh my god is all I can say! How awful and rude! That is so wrong of them. I'm so sorry that they are doing this to you guys. How unfair and just awful. Family isn't supposed to back stab you like that.
I hope you guys can beat them to it!
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
11 Apr 08
oooouuuccchh!!!I don't blame you, that is down right MEAN..
And you had no idea that this cousin would do this? Oh I can't even imagine how low they went..I will pray for you in this, to have such a beautiful home taken from you like that, is horrible..
Please keep us updated, I really wanted to see you in this home and seeing all the things you were going to do..
What does your s/o say about this? Since it is his cousin after all..
And you had no idea that this cousin would do this? Oh I can't even imagine how low they went..I will pray for you in this, to have such a beautiful home taken from you like that, is horrible..
Please keep us updated, I really wanted to see you in this home and seeing all the things you were going to do..
What does your s/o say about this? Since it is his cousin after all..@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
11 Apr 08
I am so sorry foxyfire, my husband is the same way, always looking out for the other guy, but not his family..
I hope he takes a different outlook on this, because I know how much you wanted that house..
I hope he takes a different outlook on this, because I know how much you wanted that house..
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
11 Apr 08
I know how it is when you finally really find the house you wanted and it does sort of become your house like you say. That is just mean that a family member would do that to you and it looks like they had been planning on this all along because of the trailer bit you told us about. thats just plain sneaky and underhanded, specially of a family member. You could almost take it as just luck if it had been a stranger, but this seems like it was planned ahead to get you to take their crappy trailor.That is realy a shame and i hope somehow maybe you can still get the house. good luck to you.
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
11 Apr 08
The only thing I keep hoping for is that- this isn't the first time they've claimed to be buying a house...I remembered that after I calmed down...so maybe they'll change their minds about this one too. ANd yes, I think in their minds we are their way out of their trailer. THey want out, they know how desperate we are, they think eventually we'll break down and buy their trailer. WEll, we have 8 kids total, 4 living with us, what are we going to do with a small 2 bedroom trailer!?
-Maybe I'll remind them about all the work that needs to be done before anyone can even move in...if they want out of the trailer park so soon this is not the house for them. From what I know, the best case scenario would have us moving in just in time for school to start since our oldest child together starts kindergarten in the fall and the house is a different elementary school (same district) than where we are now. And even then we'd probably only have the bare minimum done...it's not really that bad but the town switched to public water and sewer since the house was last lived in and that will be a big expense right of the bat and then the kitchen will need some work...and that will take us probably right up to August. Project 3 will be a furnace before winter and THEN we can get to the fun stuff finally.
@thedaddym (1731)
• United States
19 Apr 08
That is soooo wrong on so many levels. I would definately say something. There is a slim chance it is a cooincidence, so maybe you should talk to him about this. But if they did that on purpose that is really rotton.
@untouchable_67 (46)
• United States
18 Apr 08
I don't know how a family member could do this to you. Did you ask him why he did this, not that there will be any excuse that will be good enough. I hope you get the house.
@sacmom (14192)
• United States
12 Apr 08
That really sucks foxy. I hope you beat him and his wife (not literally 
) in getting this house. They certainly don't deserve it after what they did to you.
Though if they do get it maybe, just maybe it'll be haunted. Or you could always convince them somehow that it is. After all, didn't you say someone got murdered in this house... 
) in getting this house. They certainly don't deserve it after what they did to you.
Though if they do get it maybe, just maybe it'll be haunted. Or you could always convince them somehow that it is. After all, didn't you say someone got murdered in this house... @sid556 (30960)
• United States
12 Apr 08
Did they know they were looking at the very same house as you guys? I'm always looking for excuses for people when they do such unbelievable things as this. Its hard to believe that anyone, much less a close relative, would stoop so low. Well if they did it knowingly then I guess you can say you really aren't close to anyone on his side of the family. A friend would not do that.
I am betting you'll find an even better deal soon. Don't give up.
@phillygirl606 (1112)
• United States
12 Apr 08
This is so mean. I really feel so bad for you. How could someone you confided in actually go and do this to you. And to make it worse it's actually a family member. I know you said you's were close but I think it is time that you write this family member off. I do not want to sound harsh but if your cousin would actually do this to you than he is lacking some feelings that you thought the two of you had. He would defiently be gone out of my life if one of my family members did this to me. I really hope that it ends up going your way, and maybe you need to ask your cousin why he is doing this to you. Next time keep things like this to yourself. I know you were happy and wanted to share your happiness, but next time make sure it's a done deal in your favor before you tell anyone.
@sunkistroses401 (281)
• United States
12 Apr 08
This post actually made me cry. i know how hard it is to try to buy a house me and my boyfriend were going to buy a house last year. I went to see the house and instantly fell in love with it. The problem ended up being our crappy credit... we couldn't get approved for a loan. But I had already played out our entire lives in that house. I mean as soon as I walked in to the house the real estate agent had to ask why I was crying and i told her that i could picture my whole life in that house and that I pictured having children and watching them run around in the back yard. So this story makes me even more sad than my own because yours ends up in not being as close with that certain family member.
@SweetVanillaKisses (173)
• Canada
12 Apr 08
OMG!!! I would be just as mad as you are if someone close to me did this. And I would probably never talk to them again. That is so cruel. I really hope you and your family get the house over them hun
Good Luck
Hugzzz
