If you ran over a child and they died could you live with that?
By TriciaW
@TriciaW (2441)
United States
April 11, 2008 3:45pm CST
Another discussion reminded me of this. A friend of mine had a grandson that was riding his bike. He went down the hill of the driveway and did not look and was hit by a car. The driver had no chance of seeing the child because there were cars parked on each side of the drive way. The child died in the hospital. I was so proud of my friend because she went to the boy that was driving who had not left the hospital and told him that it was an accident and he was not to blame himself. She told him that her grandson was at fault and she wanted him to know that she would never blame him for hitting him and wanted him to always remember it was not his fault. I do not know what became of that young boy that hit the child but I know how hard it must have been for him. I don't know what I would do if that happened to me. I don't think I would ever be the same after that. It was such a sad thing to happen to the family but the poor boy that hit him it had to be awful. What would you do if you hit a child. Could you be as wonderful as my friend and try to help the person that hit your child?
9 people like this
18 responses
@luvstochat (6907)
• United States
11 Apr 08
I don't know if I could ever forgive anyone for killing my child. I always watch driveways and corners when I am driveing as little kids to have a tendency to come out of nowhere.
My aunts friend hit a little girl on a bike and it killed her she was coming around a big curve and the little girl was in the middle of the road and she didn't have time to stop she has never gotten over it.
1 person likes this
@eden32 (3973)
• United States
11 Apr 08
A nearly identical thing happened to my friend's nephew. He too was killed in bike & car accident that was truly an accident. I think your friend did the right thing. I think it would be a horrible guilt to live with, but I hope that helped the driver process it.
1 person likes this
@icyorchid (2564)
• United States
12 Apr 08
If I had hit a child with my car, I would never be able to forgive myself.
If I was in that situation, I don't know if I would be able to do that at that time, but eventually. I don't think I would be able to talk to anyone, I'd be in shock and probably passed out on the floor.
I would never wish that on anyone and pray for anyone it did happen too.
@kbourgerie (8780)
• United States
12 Apr 08
I had a friend once that hit a child when she was driving. She wouldn't talk about it, so I don't know all the circumstances involved, but apparently it wasn't her fault as she was never cited. It happened to me once when I was coming back from taking my child to school. I had stopped at a stop sign and a little boy came out of nowhere, didn't see me at the stop sign and ran into my car. It scared the sh@t out of me, but the boy got right up and hopped back on his bike. I kept trying to ask him if he was ok, and he said he was, but I have never forgotten the incident. I can't imagine how I might have felt had he actually been hurt.
@punkgurl73 (248)
• United States
12 Apr 08
This young man acted like an adult so,he should have been treated with respect the way your friend treated him.If he could not stop he was not to blame.He showed he cared when he stayed at the hospital and he will have to live with this forever now!
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
15 Apr 08
I think that would be one of the hardest things in the world to have to live with even if you were not at fault. I do feel for the young boy who hit the child. What a wise and wonderful woman was that grandmother to try to put the yong man at ease who had just hit her grandson. So coureagous while stillin grief over her grandson to think of that jnfortunate young driver. I do not know if I could have lived with myself.
@Shaun72 (15959)
• Palatka, Florida
11 Apr 08
Your friend is very kind to forgive for something like this and realize it was her grandsons fault. I feel really bad for the guy that hit him. That would be hard for me to live with. It would also be hard if it was my child to forgive the person who did this.
@sacmom (14192)
• United States
12 Apr 08
If I were to run over a child in that kind of situation I don't think I could ever live with myself, even if their family and I knew it wasn't my fault. Sure, it was a freak accident, but I'd feel so bad just the same.
So long as the person wasn't distracted (i.e. under the influence, talking on the cell phone, reading while driving, etc), I think I'd be able to forgive someone if they ran over one of my kids. I know I'd be blaming myself more than anyone though as I should have been watching my kids more closely.
@alangardner (185)
• United States
12 Apr 08
heck no I would not be able to live with that. Heck I would not even be able to live with it if I ran over a dog. I would probably hate myself so much for doing that I would probably have someone run over myself so I can know the pain the kid went trough. I wish I never had to think of this because now I am going to have nightmares about me running over a poor innocent kid. And whenever I dream of things they usually come true so now I am scared to drive the next 2 weeks. Now I am going to be all paranoid.
@asawanialvin0611 (1877)
• Philippines
12 Apr 08
of course, your best enemy is your consciencethat will haunt you till you admit your mistake
@SassyKittyKat (2135)
• Australia
12 Apr 08
Man, that's awful! I don't think I would ever be the same again. I don't think I would be able to live with the guilt. So many times I get nervous when I'm driving past anyone on a bike but especially kids because often times these kids don't look while they ride thier bikes in the streets but this was not the case with your friend's situation. It's sad that she had to go through that.
If someone hit my child and killed him/her and I knew for an absolute undoubtable fact that it was not their fault, I would definitely do what your friend did. It would be hard though and so, I commend her for her courage and her humanity!
@dizzblnd (3073)
• United States
12 Apr 08
If it was truly an innocent accident, then yes. I do believe I would be able to tell the person that it wasn't their fault and try to help them heal themselves as it would help to heal myself. However, if it was a guilty accident, ie drunk, reckless, left the scene without trying to help.. then there is no way in hell I would be able to forgive the other person.
If I hit the child and it was an innocent accident.. I would feel horrible all of my life, probably blame myself for not being able to predict what was going to happen. But I would be able to have a clear conscious and not let it completely eat me up. If I was drunk, or reckless, or left without trying to help... I don't think I would be able to live with myself.. the guilt would eat me alive and I would self destruct.
@p1kef1sh (45681)
•
11 Apr 08
What a terrible dilemma. But unequivocally I would tell whoever ran over my child that I was not blaming them. Accidents happen, children don't look or listen. I might blamer myself for not keeping a closer eye on the child but no blame. If I ran over a child I would be distraught. Even if I were not to blame and no blame was held against me by the child's parents. I am not sure that I would be able to drive again actually.
@jenni7202 (1598)
• United States
11 Apr 08
I honestly don't think I could live with myself. If it were possible for me to live, it would take a REALLY long time for me to get over it, and to move on with my life. It would always be in the back of my mind though. I think I would be afraid to ever drive again, for fear that it would happen again.
It was really brave of your friend to have said that to the young man that hit her grandson. It probably helped that young man to realize that it really was an accident, and he shouldn't go on hating himself.
@graceandowen (1637)
•
11 Apr 08
your friend truly is a fantastic person, i dont know if i could be as forgiving as her i can only hope i would if i ever found myself in such a situation
on the other hand if i were the driver i honestly dont think i could ever get behind the wheel of a car again and i would never forget or forgive myself for the accident that happened, there would always be what if's in my mind, what if i had stopped before, what if i hadnt have gone out etc
a truly terrible situation for all xxx
@kezabelle (2974)
•
11 Apr 08
Honestly? I really dont know if I ran a child over I would have to live with it for the sake of my own children, but im not so sure even if my child was at fault I could be so forgiving to someone who had however accidently killed my child.
Id like to think I could be big enough to tell them to not live in guilt as it was not their fault however I think to be brutally honest I would be so heartbroken and hurting so badly I would want to lash out make others hurt like I was so I probably would not be so nice to them. I know that sounds cruel but I watched a friend lose her daughter to cancer and she just hit out at everyone even though it was no ones fault when you are hurting that much I truely dont think you can help it
