A death in the family.

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My partner's father died yesterday. He was not a well man, ever since he came back from Vietnam. He was a meth addict and an alcoholic. He was slowly killing himself. The thing is, my partner has not seen him since 2003. She last saw him when we wnet to Florida for her grandfather's funeral. She ended up in the psyche ward of a hospital down there for 3 weeks, the reasons of which I will not go in to, but her family is not healthy for her. She has been heavily medicated since then. She is feeling guilty because she cannot go to Florida for his memorial service. Cannot afford it, is one reason. But if it was the right thing to do we could scrape up the funds to pay for the plane trip. Her therapist and I don't think it would be healthy for her. I don't think we are wrong. Her father basically abandoned the her and her brother in favor of drugs. Hasn't been in their lives for over 20 years. She did call him often to try to connect with him, but he was unresponsive when she called. Now she is feeling guilty because she thinks she didn't try hard enough to connect. I have told her she did all she could and she has nothing to feel guilty about. Have you ever felt guilty when a disconnected family member died and you wish you had done more to try to get them back in your life? PEACE