Would you clean an ashtray mess if you didn't smoke??
By mssnow
@mssnow (9484)
United States
April 19, 2008 3:03pm CST
I am staying with other people in a house of smokers. I DON'T SMOKE!! Thats bad enough. They have 6 dogs and two cats. Today on the coffee table was a full ashtray of cigarette butts. The little kitten got up there and knocked it off the table. I was in the house alone. Do you think I should be responsible for cleaning up the mess since I don't smoke?? Should i leave it and wait for them to get home to clean it up?? I clean up all the time. Do dishes and i just vacuumed the floor. Its not like i don't do anything to help. Maybe I'm being nitpicky but i just dont feel like i should clean up the mess when i dont smoke. What is your opinion??
12 people like this
36 responses
@littlefranciscan (18327)
• United States
19 Apr 08
Actually, I think you are doing them a favor by not picking it up..They need to be aware of their duties and not expect you to do all the cleaning all the time..If you clean it up ..they will always expect it of you..It's nice to help out..but dont let them make you their house cleaner.
2 people like this
@littlefranciscan (18327)
• United States
20 Apr 08
were they visiting you..or you visiting them? Dont think I understood..I do think people learn to take advantage of others because the other permits them to..Someone has to break the cycle.
1 person likes this
@highflyingxangel (9225)
• United States
20 Apr 08
I live in a house with other smokers and I don't smoke myself either. When I came home on Friday, the ashtray was just full of ashes and butts. So, naturally I had to empty it or else I knew it wouldn't get done. I'm constantly emptying my mother's and cleaning up after her in general and it gets old. I look at it this way, leave and have it make a bigger mess or just take the few seconds to empty it and not have a huge mess later.
2 people like this
@highflyingxangel (9225)
• United States
20 Apr 08
You don't know my mother. If she doesn't do it (which she never does) and if someone else doesn't clean it up, it will NEVER EVER get done.
1 person likes this
@Darkwing (21583)
•
19 Apr 08
I would say it's entirely up to you. After all, it's their home, their dirty ashtray which they didn't bother to empty and wash before they left the house and their kitten. I would just say though, I'm a smoker, and I would never expect a guest non-smoker to clear up behind me, so unless you have rubber gloves and a gas mask... leave it for them. If you can manage to find these two items, go ahead and clean it up if it's bugging you!
Brightest Blessings my friend.
2 people like this
@Darkwing (21583)
•
5 Mar 09
You're welcome, my friend, and thank you for the BR. In all honesty, I don't think any smoker would be that inconsiderate... or they should be. It's selfish to expect somebody else to clean your ashtray, and I would always ensure mine was emptied and washed before I left the house to somebody else. Even with visitors, I would probably either go outside and smoke, or use one, allocated room, so as not to subject a non-smoker to my smoke.
@cathyt1557 (173)
• Canada
20 Apr 08
Was it your choice to stay with people who smoke? If you don't like to live with smokers perhaps you should move. I guess if it is their house, their rules. I don't smoke, but some friends and family do. When they come to my house they know when they need to smoke they have to go outside. I won't have my house smelling of smoke. However, if I lived in someone elses house and they smoked, it would be their house, their rules. I don't think it would be a big deal if you saw a mess, to clean it up, but you can pretend you didn't see it if you really don't want to do it.
2 people like this
@rbartlett5 (18)
• United States
20 Apr 08
if you were home and the kitten knocked it over, then id say yes you should clean up the mess the kitten made. Dont let the kitten up there. In general, i think if you dotn smoke, you should not have to clean the butts and ashtrays. its a gross habit (i do smoke, but i still think its gross) and if you smoek you should clean pu your own mess.
On another note, we dont smoke inside because we have kids now, but before kids we had non smoking roommates so we smoked outside, can i ask why you dont make your roommates/family/whoever smoke outside instead of polluting your lungs? Second hand smoke kills morepeople than smoking yourself does :(
@cwgrlsarefun (1581)
• United States
20 Apr 08
I would have to say that it is up to you. I myslef would clean up the mess as you did say that you are the only one home. I know that they should of cleaned the ashtray up before leaving but since they did not and you are staying in their home for whatever reason it just seems that it would be the right thing to do. Like I said though it is up to you and if that is just one of those things that you don't do then so be it. It sounds as if you do so many other things around the house already that they should of been able to pick up after themselves.
2 people like this
@Modestah (11179)
• United States
20 Apr 08
Responsible? probably not responsible. The responsible persons would have emptied the trays when they were done using them.
Would I pick it up...?
Yes, why not? menial work is not beneath me, and it is a good and charitable act to serve others in such an easy way.
Are you a guest in their home?
It would show good will to clean up the mess.
2 people like this
@skinnychick (6905)
• United States
20 Apr 08
I would have to clean it. I couldn't let something sit there it would drive me nuts. Unless I was going out, then I could leave and wait for them to get home first and clean it. That way I wouldn't have to look at it anymore.
@skinnychick (6905)
• United States
20 Apr 08
LOL...then in that case, I wouldn't clean it! Make them do that! :)
1 person likes this
@goergineo (1498)
• Jordan
20 Apr 08
IF i use an ashtray, I would clean it. when I was a smoker I used to clean my astray. after I quit I never cleaned an ashtray. i mean why would not those who use it clean it. I can not remove other's mess. they should clean the mess they cause. well, they have to learn to clean the mess after them.
2 people like this
@saundyl (9783)
• Canada
20 Apr 08
Yes, I would clean it up. I dont smoke and my boyfriend does. When I'm at his house I tend to empty the ash trays he has around because i find them yucky and gross to see. Plus if they get knocked over they make a nasty mess that someone has to clean up and...if its me that knocks it over i feel i should clean it. If its him...he puts it off and i clean it if im there...if im not he eventually cleans it up. Some guys are such slobs!
If i was you and it was my kitten that knocked it over id be definitly cleaning it up even if i dont smoke.
2 people like this
@rhane7315 (5649)
• Philippines
20 Apr 08
definitely not. they're the one's responsible for cleaning it up. if they don't wanna clean some mess like that, they shouldn't smoke in the first place
2 people like this
@Nancy333 (9)
• United States
20 Apr 08
I'm a smoker myself and I agree whole-heartedly with what all of you are saying. I would never let a non-smoker clean up after my horrible mess. In my eyes, it's my nasty habit and I should be the one responsible. Not leave it to others to clean up after me. Just my 2 cents.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
21 Apr 08
my opinion doesn't matter I think you should do whatever you think is best.
However I never smoked in my life, and I would clean it up just so I wouldn't have to smell it.
1 person likes this
@emeraldisle (13139)
• United States
20 Apr 08
If you didn't drink coffee and the kitten knocked over a coffee cup and spilt it would you clean that up or leave it?
As a smoker I empty my ashtrays regally but not necessarily every time before I go to leave the house. I do it as needed and now and then when I leave there might be a few in the ashtray. I don't let it become overflowing but what one person deems as full another might not. So it's hard to say on that part.
Obviously you don't like the fact that they smoke but you did decide to stay with them knowing this fact. That was your choice. If you aren't happy with it you could leave.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
20 Apr 08
Nope Im stuck and since i didnt smoke I really didnt know what I was getting into.lol. I knew they smoked but I had a different idea of how it would be. And no If someone left a cup of coffee on the table and it wasnt me. I would leave it for them to clean up. Thats just the way I am. You make a mess or leave something out to be made into a mess then you clean up the mess later.
@crazed_moma (1054)
• United States
20 Apr 08
I would dump it so I wouldn't have to smell it any more... Of course the smell does linger....
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
19 Apr 08
Yes I would just because of the principle of the issue. It's kind of like doing for others that you'd want done for yourself kind of thing. However, it is your choice afterall so do what you think is right for you.
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
20 Apr 08
Did I sound like I would? Put it this way, it tells a lot about a person if they were to clean it up however like I said before, it's your choice so do what you think is right for you.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
20 Apr 08
No absolutely not . let the smokers clean up their own messes.they made so they should have to clean up after themselves.If I smoked I would not make others that are non smokers clean up after me. do unto others as you would have them do unto you that is the golden rule so live by it.
1 person likes this
@suiallen333 (8)
• China
20 Apr 08
I'm agreet with you,and it's clear that you has't any responsible to clean there messes.In my opinion,everyone must do their own job.
1 person likes this
