Thanks for asking....

You've got to be kidding. They planned this without even letting you know, much less asking you? Oh no, that wouldn't happen in my house. In fact, I'd probably be so ticked off that they had the gall to do that, that I would tell them they COULDN'T take him now, that you already had plans. Does your son already know?

I don't want to sound pushy or rude, but if you and your husband doesn't knick this in the bud now, it will get worse as your son gets older. I scrolled down and noticed that you live with them, bless your heart that your husband is letting this go on. I would have been cool, your paying for all of us to go with you, right in front of my child. Oh honey, don't forget to pack extra sun lotion and bug spray. I would do this every where they wanted to take him til they got tired of it, or ran out of money first. Honestly, nothing you say or do will end this problem. Your husband is the only one that can fix this. Until he stops being scared of them, this will go on until your son goes to college.

Grand parents or anyone, How canthey take your son away and on his birthday weekend. I wouldn't allow that , you are being so tolerant about this. I would have picked up the phone told them if they can reshedule the visit as its his birthday and I would like to be with him on that day. I am sure your son would miss being there too. May be in the excitement of the trip he is not realising that right now. I atleast would tell them to call me up first before planning anything with my kids for all you know he may have big test on Maonday morning at school. Do give them a piece of your mind when they come back from the trip. I alos was like you taking things lying downm from my in laws but last year they harrassed me so much that now I have put my foot down very firmly. They may call me rude or whatever but this time I am not backing down even an inch. It has actually taken the stress of me visiting them out of my life if nothing else.

Of course. Grandparents cannot claim superior right over the grandchild however close they are. I have come to the age of being a grandmother and I never wish to do that-come between parents[my son and his wife/when he gets one] and my grandchild.

I have a question, when you found out, did you ask your FIL if maybe he should have asked, that maybe you already had plans??? That so isn't right, but if your son is looking forward to the trip, I wouldn't stop it, but I would make it clear that for them to take any of your children anywhere, even just down the street, that they should ask you....Tell them, that since they are not the guardian that if they do take any of the kids without asking you first, you could call the authorities on them..

Oh I have just replied to your other discussion about what you are packing for him! I think it is unacceptable that they just assumed that they would be taking him with them without asking your permission first AND on his birthday. I gather you had to change all the arrangements for his party. Can you imagine what would have happened if he had been a little older with lots of friends invited over! Personally, I would say something along the lines of .... I am so happy that they have decided to take him with them but I would really appreciate it if they asked me first. He is after all MY son and we had plans for his birthday, which I am happy to rearrange but it does put the household in a turmoil if things aren't organised first, blah, blah, blah. You ARE the mother and permission has to be granted before they go out the door. That is common sense and it is also a curtesy, something that I am sure the grandparents instilled in their own children, so it's no use forgetting something as basic as this when it comes to your kids. My best friend's mother does the same with her grandchild, it makes me so mad. It is almost like she is ignoring my best friend completely, it also undermines her position as the mother which the child should always obey (as far as I'm concerned anyway). Good luck and thanks for sharing this with us.

Oh, they should definitely have asked. Good thing you didn't spend all the money for his party yet. That is so weird that they would choose to do that on his birthday weekend. I grew up in a family where birthdays were spent together.

Oh they so should have checked with you fist. Id have said something to them nicely of course but I would have said something about having been planning things and some notice would have been nice.

did you mention to them what you had planned to do before they sprang this on you? if you did, this was plain rude, but if not, well... not all inlaws are bad...my inlaws just payed our $400 dental bill! (my hubby got put down to part time at work, so we are suffering a bit financially).

Although I never been in this kind of situation i know that anyone or everyone must give permission on anything or everything. A grandparents should still ask for permission if they want to take the grandchild for a trip. You know why they are responsible for their grandchild if they are in their custody, anything that can happen they are liable. I don't want to sound a lawyer here since i don't have a fair knowledge but i think that is the point here even if they are your parents.

definitely, grandparents should get permission first before taking their grandchild on a trip. in your situation especially since it'll be your son's birthday. in my book, that is totally classless on your in-laws' part. you should say something about it. if you do not speak out now, this will happen again, perhaps on a much worse level.

not taking my son on his birthday. not taking my son at all. he is newly 3 . he needs to be with you. his own bed everynight.

Get permission my foot! How about not making plans to start with! That is your and your husband's special day with your son. They are being presumptous and completely lacking respect for your rights as a parent. It is not only wrong, it's showing no respect for you or your husband. In-law or not, you don't just take it upon yourself to make plans with your grandchildren without checking it out with the parents first.

In the real sense of the word!!! your mother in-law has no respect in you. She should not do that. It doesn't mean that she has the power to do everything because she doesn't like you? that's rude. Maybe you need to talk and pour out all your grudges. Anyway, even how bad our parents inlaw they still need our respect because they can be considered as our second parents. But in your situation!! I don't know how to live with it if I am in your shoes.

They definitely should have asked first! Would they take him for a piercing or a tattoo without your permission? You are his mother and EVERYTHING should go through you. They are just plain wrong and rude. You need to tell them or they will pull this nonsense again and again. When he gets older, it may be bigger more important stuff. What if they buy him a motorcycle for his 16th birthday without asking you? Stick up for your maternal rights now while there is still time to train the grandparents!

Errr excuse me but who do they think they are? How rude of them. I'd be telling them, sorry but NO i have made other plans. I cannot believe they did not ask you first. If they really want to take him and you think it's a good idea, then go with them as you have a right to be with your son on his birthday. But in all honesty, i'd be telling them NO and make sure they know to ask in the future. Some people are just unbelievable.

Darn right they should have asked you if they could take your son out of town with them. He is your child not theirs. It stinks that you will not get to spend his birthday with him. Are you going to do something special like the day before or when he gets back? He will only be 3, so I doubt he will know.

whoa that's harsh... they really should've asked first. it is, after all, your right as the mom. and besides, as the mother, you should spend your son's birthday with him. sure, grandparents are also important but you should be the primary one to be with him. they really should have asked first.