My Trip Around the World in Satire part 1...
April 23, 2008 4:38am CST
I had a friend comment that my partial blog postings did not make a lot of sense. I have decided to post my 4 post for you to read them. Hopefully those can understand can have a good chuckle over what I write....I do have more on my actual blog please go check it out. Thanks Ainge My Trip Around the World in Satire The Begining or Part 1. This is one of a few in this series. I am not sure where the other parts of it will be, but please feel free to view my profile to see where the others will be placed...Please enjoy. I began this article as an article, then I thought to myself, hey I have a blog, and it came to my attention that this should be an actual blog that can be updated once a week or a month, depending upon my schedule. I welcome you to my insight of some things not many wish to touch upon: Life and life around us. I am no expert; however I believe I have earned the rank to be considered an adviser. I also believe in the constitution and the first amendment rights that we are blessed with as Americans. So I will write freely until the first amendment is taken out of the constitution. With the current status quo, that may be next year, because for some reason or another there is a new bill or law passed that affects us, but we don't know about it until after the fact. Please don't tell me, well people should keep up with the current political status. My response is this, when do they have time? The ones who actually want to do something usually two jobs that they are holding down to feed their families, there is family time, and then at some point and time they must sleep? So it is not that they don’t wish to keep up, time does not allow them to keep up. Unless they are wonder woman or superman, I am sure that their families think they are but with out those gifts of superpowers they can not do everything. So I am hoping that people will have a good laugh and pass this on to others who need a good laugh. I also would like people to be able to make their own decisions and ideas with what I write, because I am tired of hearing there is no way I can do anything to change anything. Well I am not sure if this will work, but let's try to get people to actually read this and pass it on. Call it the survival guide to today's world. Just so you know, I hear that the government will give you vacation if you are in the mood for one. That is, if you are lucky enough to be considered an “enemy combatant”, then the government gives you a free flight to see some beaches. It is even on a Naval Station called Guantanamo Bay. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guant%C3%A1namo_Bay, _Cuba http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guantanamo_Bay_detentio n_camp I hear they have lovely beaches. I might stay for the water boarding, which if you have not heard lately, may or may not be considered torture. The senate has yet to decide. Last I checked, the house has decided it is torture. I wonder which way the fearless leader of our country shall choose to go? He may need some cards so he can pronounce Guantanamo, so it may be best that he decides it is torture so that he does not have to say Guantanamo too much. As you can see, I have a burr under my skin. It is rather large and well, we all share it. So why have I begun this blog? Because I can, I want to, and I believe fully that one person can make a difference. That, and I am sure the government and other countries shall always have something for to say about them. Someone will always be a leader we don't like or find carries a lack of character. Now before we begin to blame the government for a lot of problems, let's think about this for a minute. If you honestly think about the position of being a President, a leader, someone that we try to look up to, would you really want to fill their shoes? We often say we could do a better job at managing the current system. The many who have gotten into office think that too, make promises, and then with tradition, they break their promises as well. With all the red tape, no wonder they can't actually achieve anything. Our current system as we now know it, our everyday grind that we live would not allow it. Hey, I am a New Yorker, you become accustomed to living life with a schedule. Without that schedule, you lose time, and time is money. Well, you get the idea; same speech, different person. So when I began this project of the rants that I am going to do, I started because of my research on something called CA-MRSA. You may or may not have heard about it. If you get it, please don't share it. I am not sure if this is the gift we would like to keep on giving. In doing research, I have come across some things that raised some red flags and made me go hmmm... How many others know about this, and if they don't, why don't they? I am thinking you can compare me to Agent Fox Mulder from the X-files. Because in reality I am much like him in the fact that I believe that the government is out to destroy normal humanity. Now I am not a riot-enthusiast. I don't put on war paint and decide to riot in the streets. However I do attend a few protests now and then. As for the riots in the streets, I think I would like to skip that part of the tour, thank you very much, but if it comes to that point, I will get dressed up so that I can riot in the streets. I believe the pen is mightier than the sword anyway, so with the research of CA-MRSA, I decided, why stop there? How about if we just go all the way, see how far this blog can reach, and how many people I can upset along the way. Because heaven forbid I feel ways about things and have an opinion that may or may not be ok with the current politically correct venue of the time. This might actually mean that I can think for myself. So when I go off on side notes, they are just to keep you interested in seeing what the next thing is that I am going to say so you can get a small chuckle in your day. Now moving on, political correctness, if you are looking for that in this blog, I am respectful, these are my opinions, and well, what fun is life if you don't ruffle a few feathers? I don't use certain words because I would not like them to be my label. I like the idea of writing and reaching people. Perhaps that is politically incorrect in a politically correct society. I think I may end up with a Parental Advisory sticker, so there you go. That is your Parental warning, if you are not adult enough to enjoy the humor here, well then you are too young to be here, but please go get your parents so you have parental approval. There will be a contract at the end of the blog so you may get your parents' permission to read this blog. I will expect to see them in my email. I may touch on things that others may not want you to read. Oh, isn't it fun being a rebel? Speaking of which, how can you keep up? Today if you say one wrong word, one wrong statement, you could be facing a string of lawsuits. I understand it is important to be respectful, but the politically correct wording can go a bit overboard. I mean honestly, it is pretty bad when you have to ask the host of the party what is correct to call someone. I think there should be a daily email to everyone who has a computer with the politically correct words of the day and then invite people to make a new one just so the government does not have to come up with more words that we can be sued over or arrested for. Common sense should kick in sometime, name-calling all around is just plain rude. Here's an idea, remember the manners you were taught when you were growing up? Use them like you are supposed to; if you would not want to be called that particular word, don't say it. Do we really need a guide to tell us what we can and cannot say for words? Maybe if they were not brought to our attention, we would never have used them in the first place. So I would like to take you round the world with words; a humorist way of looking at things in today's society. Why do it on a blog? How else can I bring joy and laughter to millions of people's faces and actually seem interesting? A bit about me, if you are reading this blog for the first time, which you probably are if you are reading this page, I have a very dry sense of humor. You decided to continue reading, so you apparently have your permission slip back in. I am very proud of you. You get an A for effort and completion. I am hoping you look forward to my weekly blog of how to survive the earth in a satirical setting. It's ok to laugh as well; I have found that humor can add years to a person's life-span. Now if you don't wish to extend this life's sentencing, please stop reading now. For those of you who would like a bit of laughter, that there are more important things in life to worry about, and know real life is too serious to be taken seriously, please continue reading. I am a smoker. Just to let you know, I smoke. Yes, for those of you who are non-smokers, well, I am one of those who are politically incorrect. Please don't comment that I really should quit for my health's sake. We smokers know this. We don't need a lecture, besides that, smokers are few and far between these days if you look around. Since that is the case, and I don't like being part of a cookie-cutter design, I don't like being part of a mold. I am fairly sure that if there is a mold of me out there, they have destroyed it. Personally, I wouldn't want another one of me running around either. I get the feeling that one of me is enough, more than enough for anyone. I personally like being unique and opinionated. I also am a mom, of quite a few, adopted or not. My children range from ages that are endless. I am very lucky to have them in my life for the plain and simple fact that they help me see what I see so I can write to let you see. I have lived all over the United States, I do vote, and I have an opinion.
23 Apr 08
hon as a professional writer and believe me I am not trying to put you don't in any way, this does not make any sense, there are too many thought thats are jumbled together with no transition from one that to an other. A good writer my prepare the reader when changing from one thought to another. an example: n That is just what I said before. I love shoes. The boys made a touchdown. Why he asked me to help him with his paper I will never know. one of this makes sense to the reader. Even if it makes sense to the writer you must understand that the reader is not in your head nor was privy to your experiences. Here is how you can say the same thing but understandably. At the beginning of this paper I talked about the importance of good appearance, I touched lightly on how I love shoes and how I owned at least 20 different pairs. I was watching my boys college football game last week, and it got me to thinking about the cleats the boys have to wear, They are certainly not pretty but they serve the purpose. I looked over my shoe collection and found that I do not own a single pair of suitable footwear unless you consider pumps and stilettos suitable footwear. I just love pretty shoes, cleats are not. My boys are sensible they go to college, they have a good head on their shoulder, and they wear practical shoes. However do they take practical courses? That is the question still to be answered. I never did understand the importance of doing term papers in school. I rarely wrote my own, I had others do it for me. My youngest had a paper to write and he expected me to write it for him. Me! Can you imagine that! The paper had to do with how electricity acts as a conduit, as if I know anything about that. I sent him off to the library and told him to do it himself. Now maybe if the paper had been on shoes I could have given him a few good thoughts! I hope you see what I mean there. In the second two paragraphs and the these thoughts had to be have paragraphs, the reader can understand where you are going with your thoughts because there are transitions, taking the reader from one thought to the next.