whom u prefer spend your life: your real love or a man u think your inlove with

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all of us dreams or wish to spend the whole life to a person whom we really fall inlove with. However, there are cases that you can't do or there is no chances to spend the rest of your days to the person you deeply inlove with instead you happen to spend your days to a man whom you think your inlove with. How would you tell him the truth so that he won't get hurt or he won't think somthing bad towards you. Would it be possible for both of you to stay as good friends?