How do you turn down a suitor?
By chechuva
@chechuva (1275)
Philippines
April 30, 2008 12:40am CST
its very difficult to say directly that i don't want the person to continue courting me. honestly, i don't want to hurt feelings of others, especially if they are my friends.
recently a friend of mine said that he wanted to date me. i didn't react actually. i juts ignored him and pretended that i didn't heard him.
a friend of mine said that, men should be given a chance to prove themselves worthy to a woman. but if you knew to yourself that you don't like the man, will you still give him a chance? i f not, how will you say it in a nice way? 
recently a friend of mine said that he wanted to date me. i didn't react actually. i juts ignored him and pretended that i didn't heard him.
a friend of mine said that, men should be given a chance to prove themselves worthy to a woman. but if you knew to yourself that you don't like the man, will you still give him a chance? i f not, how will you say it in a nice way? 2 responses
@checapricorn (16060)
• United States
30 Apr 08
Truth hurts but we need to be honest also! In my case, when I don't like to go out with the person, I will really tell him that I am not interested any relationship beyond friendship, it might hurt or insult them but, at least I am honest enough rather than I will pretend! I have experienced this and I just told the guy we can go out with our other friends!I have one who really pursue no matter how I tried to explain him that I am not interested, maybe in a way, he can't accept that someone will say "no" to him, but after a while that he found someone, we started to talk again!
@yellowhipon (793)
• Philippines
30 Apr 08
I've always believed that being courted is a privilege for us women and courting is a guy's privilege. Courtship isnt just about wanting the girl to say "yes". Usually if she says "no" the guy stops. I believe it shouldnt be like that. Courting someone is a guys way of showing his true feeling REGARDLESS of what the girl answers. Although the decision to stop is up to guy.
Anyway, regarding your problem, you should just tell the guy straight up. If you're afraid of hurting his feelings, imagine how much painful it is for him if you tell him years later. Its just fair that you let him know how you really feel. And if you're really friends with him i think he'll respect the decision.
I've got 3brothers and so many guy friends. I've asked them the same question before and they told me that it would be better for them to know right away than be led on.
