enough in enough

India
May 5, 2008 9:47am CST
Finally i broke of with my bf. We ended it on a very bad note and i am not going to call him ever again. What does he think he is? acting like a irresponsible as**le. I just feel like banging my head with the wall right now. I am feeling so stressed out that i just wanna die. Why does this always happen to me. There is no one who can really understand me. Everyone wants to just use me and throw me. Bloody as**le. I dun want to ever get married in my life again. All my dreams are shattered. I just dream of a lovely house with two of us madly in love. Is it too big a expectation. Hell he cant even work towards that. Loser. I have had enough. I am gonna die very soon. It has taken a toll on me and my health. If i die he will be responsible for my death.~Pinks~
2 people like this
16 responses
@_Honey_ (781)
• Philippines
7 May 08
i can feel how frustrated, disappointed and hurt you really are. i understand how this situation makes you feel that way. right now, i suggest you to just let your emotion consume you. i know you're still in the grieving process. and don't skip. i'm pretty sure you'll get through it on the right time. once you're done, make sure to charge it as a learning experience. it seems to me that this isn't the first. it seems to me that you've been through a lot of broken relationships. well, let's face it. we are bound to end up with one person. so it's either you end up breaking up and live happily ever after. what i'm saying is that to avoid getting broken and shattered over and over again, i guess you should learn to discern more. i read this book which says that life is like a lesson in school. you will keep on taking it up, until you pass it as you learn from it and actualize what life teaches you. keep in mind, at the end of the day, your happiness, sanity, success and peace of mind will ALWAYS BE YOUR CHOICE AND NOBODY ELSE'S. :)
• Philippines
7 May 08
What do you need to do now, is to make urself busy, don't think about him and the things taht you've been doing together. Little by litle, u will get over him. But u are responsible for urself. God is taking away sumone or sumthing from us, because he has a bigger plan for your life. Just wait and let God works.
@laglen (19779)
• United States
6 May 08
Pinks~ NEVER EVER EVER EVER - give somebody that much control over you! If he is as much of an a** as you say, then good riddance. I know it doesn't seem like it but what you want is NOT asking too much and you CAN get it. We just have to kiss a few frogs before we can find our prince. You have to see these as learning experiecnes. Now you know that that is NOT what you want! Look at the bright side, your next boyfriend will be better! Spend some time with yourself to love yourself again, then you will have enough to love again!
@adoremay (2069)
• Philippines
6 May 08
Life is precious. Dying because, as you have said, of a irresponsible being is not worth it. As you have said, you broke up with him, so it was not him who dumped you, you dumped him! As for now, go on with your life, caution: do not pick up what you have just dumped.
6 May 08
Let me tell you clearly that this is not the end of your life. I can understand you must be feeling shattered rite now but u should not let yourself down for someone who's made you so unhappy. Heart-breaks are experienced by everyone, also by me... But we should think of it as a lesson in our life and move ahead... Jus look at all the wonderful things you could do in your valuable life instead of feeling bad for this guy.. Cheer up babe!
• India
6 May 08
Hi Pinky, I hope you are feeling better now. You started this discussion nineteen hours ago. Surely, your mood must have lifted by now. Relax, you are not the only one who is going through it. Most of do at least once in our lives. It is only a few lucky ones who find the right man immediately. I guess there are few "nice" men in the world. As per my experience, most of them just treat women as "use and throw" objects. No man is really worthy of your tears. You don't need a man to feel good and complete. This is true. And if you are patient, the right one may come along soon. If he doesn't, it doesn't really matter because no man is better than wrong man. So cheer up and proceed with life with a smile on your face. Be cheerful. You will attract a number of lovely friends, and you will soon forget this guy. Cheers and happy mylotting.
@skysuccess (8880)
• Singapore
6 May 08
As much as I want to empathize with you on this failed relationship, I just would like to point out to you that you should not be so bitter about the whole episode. In anything that we undertake there is always a term we need to recognize and accept readily and that is failure. How one fails and/or both fail is very varied and the aspects can be manifold and wide. However, such failures would be much better to happen before we enter into a marriage. Let's be honest, if the relationship is doomed to fail then there is no point begging to be otherwise. It will be simply too painful for both parties, better to end off now. Also, I do not think that you should fully blame the other party too as we all have our own expectations so don't blame each other when the both of you do not see things eye to eye. But that does not mean that there will never be another one for if the old and faulty does not go away then how can the new and workable be present? In all fairness, not all apples are rotten in the barrel if the barrel has a few rotten ones. Besides even a rotten apple is not fully rotten as I am sure there will be some edible parts still. In conclusion, no one will be responsible for your act of negligence and folly except yourself. I feel that you should not make yourself as damnable as the party at fault but to come off and out of it a better person for tomorrow.
• Malaysia
6 May 08
hi Pinky..I felt bad for what had happened. But the first thing you have to do is to calm down. I know it is a very emotional time and you are so badly hurt. Don't bang your head on the wall, don't hurt any part of yourself because of what had happened. It happened for a reason. I know it is hard for you to accept what we are saying here to you because we all know that you love this guy very much that you wish and want to have plans to stay together and growing old together. Calm down Pinky, and come back to your good senses. Don't hurt yourself in any ways. Give him some time to learn and evaluate the things he have done to you. Give both of yourself some time to think it over again and we'll see what happens next. If it doesn't work, you have to move on. I believe that things happen for a reason. Life goes on and if he is not the guy for you, there will be one who will be a better replacement. It's hard to accept what others tell you to do but you're a wise person and i know you can make wise decisions for yourself. If he is using you, you might as well be grateful that you're no longer with him. It is for your own good that you leave him for a reason like that. No one should take any advantage of your kindness, your caring nature , etc. Be calm and life goes on and enjoy the good life Pinky :) God Bless.
@wisedragon (2330)
• Philippines
5 May 08
Hey what's up with all this dying thing? You yourself said he is an a_hole. So you want to end your life because of an a_hole? I think that's a lousy reason to die. You should be thankful you were able to get rid of a guy like that. Better to be free than be with the wrong person.
• United States
5 May 08
I'm new to myLot, and this is my first discussion post. I saw your post and it just brought me back to a few years ago when I was in the same boat. There are many men out there who will do just what your boyfriend did- use you and then lose you. Those men simply aren't worth your time- they aren't worth your love; they aren't worth your tears. You are special and you don't need a man by your side to be that way. You need to gain a tremendous amount of self-respect and when you enter back into the dating world be prepared to turn away those guys that don't give you the respect you deserve. Trust me, the right one will come- I promise! You just don't want to miss on him :) I, too, hope you aren't seriously considering taking your life. There are many people who love and need you :) Just hold on a little longer- he'll come! Kristin P.
@gemini_rose (16192)
5 May 08
I am sorry that things have gone bad for you and your boyfriend, I am a bit worried about the comments you make about dying, I hope that it is because you are upset and not how you really feel, I hope that things work themselves out for you real soon. Take care xx
• Norway
5 May 08
dont give up on life because of a jerk u had in ur life. a friend of mine once told me that love is like a butterfly if u go around chasing it it will further fly away. i know you are hurting at the moment but dont give the guy power over you by killing yourself. one day your knight in shining amour will sweep you off your feet. love yourself too much not to give up
@lingli_78 (12836)
• Australia
5 May 08
pinky, i am so sad to hear about what happens between you and your bf... but life has to go on and you have to get stronger... i know that it hurts at the moment... i can fully understand that... but if you hurt yourself and even thinking of to die because of him, you are giving him all the satisfactions to see you suffer because of him... why would you give him so much influence over you??? while you are so upset like this, he might be out there laughing and enjoying himself with his friends or even another girl... it is not worth it pinky... really, take time off to regain composure of yourself... after that, get on with your life and show him that you are OK without him and can even do better... you say that he is a loser, right??? and you don't want to be a loser like him as well, right??? so get up on your feet and do something with your life now instead of wallowing about him... set new dreams for yourself and achieve it without him... you don't need him to be happy... you can be happy even without him... i wish you all the best and luck... take care and God Bless you...
• United States
5 May 08
Don't say that! Don't you dare give him that much power. Yes it hurts right now and it will for a while but it's not the end of the world. I know how it feels to have a person you love disappoint you, to have all your dreams not come true. Relationships just like life are 50/50. It's a 50% percent chance it's going to work and 50% chance it's not. Most women want what you want, to be with a man who is going to love and respect you and to have a family with. That is what I want. But in life sometimes we have to go through the storm before we see the sun. I have gone through the storm and now have my sun and though we have had some rough moments, I wouldn't trade it for anything. It's hard to do sometimes but don't give up. Have some alone time to meditate and to really look deeply into your soul and ask yourself why does it keep happening to you. Is it something with you or the man? You deserve to be happy.......don't forget it.
@agfarm (930)
• United States
5 May 08
Dear Pinky....I have found that Banging the head against the wall can be very theraputic. I do it all o' the time!!!!!!! The Only thing you might want to be careful about is....if you do it too much..... you start to hear things like Bells and horns and Sh** at all hours of the day & night. I think over the course of my life I have Banged my head in to the wall so much , because of all of the Insanity I see in the world.....I have made my self Punch -drunk ( or something like that ) I would reccommend that if you have to Bang your head as I still do...... Place a pillow between your head and the Brick-wall. It really helps. I hope this has helped you out Dear. And your Dress is lovely today Dear. Say.....Do you have any good Ideas? Have you had any within the last 24 hours?
@roxanne271 (2035)
• Trinidad And Tobago
5 May 08
Hi Pinky, Never, ever beat up yourself over things like this. If you know he was using you and didn't truly love you then you should get over him in a flash! Let me tell you why, you do not need people like that in your life and you should be happy that you have gotten rid of him! I understand what you are saying about settling down and stuff, do not go out looking for it. It will come to you! In the meantime, enjoy being single, treat yourself to some of your favourite ice cream or to your favourite meal or something. Just think positive and let go of the past. When you think of the negative things in the past it affects your ability to move on to the future. It is not easy to just forget, hey, I can't completely forget...but just occupy yourself with things and people that make you happy! and aim for the future, just don't look back on the bad things your past, only the good. I hope you feel better soon.