the adage: neither a borrower or lender be does thathold true in today's world?
@Hatley (163781)
Garden Grove, California
May 5, 2008 6:28pm CST
mylotters my dad lived by this adage; neither a borrower nor
a lender be. while I know there is a lot of truth in
this I also feel there are a lot of times when this
must be bypassed.
For example if my son comes to me and has a financial
problem I am not about to turn him away. And if I have
a money problem he does not turn me away. He always does
pay me back and the same with me most of the time, as
sometimes I do not have the funds. Also if my friend
were to come to me and ask for help how could I turn
her down if i had any way to help her? And I was in
an emergency situation in re to moving in a number of
years back and without my best friends help I would have
been sunk. She lent me emergency funds and I repaid
her over a period of time. What mylotters is your take
on this? are you strictly not a borrower nor a lender?
2 people like this
10 responses
@GreenMoo (11834)
•
6 May 08
I think it's a good motto to run your life by.
If you don't borrow then you don't get yourself into a mess. Now I don't mean that you shouldn't ask in an emergency, but if you *aim* not to borrow, then you will manage your finances more wisely and hopefully not *need* to borrow.
And lending, that's actually a hard one to explain. I don't lend with the expectation of getting my money back. If a friend needs money in an emergency then I'm happy to offer it if I can. But I'd prefer to give it no strings attached, and then if they can give it back in the future it is a bonus rather than something to fall about if there is a problem.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
6 May 08
green moo it really is a good motto and I think that when Ilend to anyone its only a very close friend and I do it not really
expecting anything back,but when I borrowed from my best friendI knew that she was not super wealthy and that she really needed]
that money back, not that she would have askedd for it but Ihad to give it back for my own sake as I do not like to owe someone
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
6 May 08
green moo I hate to owe money to anyone and try my best
to keep paid up always.
@gemini_rose (16264)
•
6 May 08
I think that your Dad is right in a way, I hate the thought of borrowing money off anyone, the only money that we have ever borrowed is off the bank for the mortgage and I hated doing that!! I have never borrowed money off a friend or family member because I would not like to think that I could not pay them back, I think the only people we have ever lent money too is my hubbys sister, but she has only ever borrowed a little bit and then paid us back straight away.
1 person likes this
@gemini_rose (16264)
•
6 May 08
I know, and I know that you would be as good as your word. I could not borrow the money off a friend because it would be my luck never to be in a position to pay it back, so for me I would rather go without if you know what I mean.
I am purely going on what I would do, and not meaning anything towards you!!
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
6 May 08
the money I borrowed from my best friend was in an
emergency situation and with the stipulation she
would indeed bepaid back and she was in full as
Ido not like to owe anyone for any thing.
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
6 May 08
I always a borrower when I was still single and working in my Country. I have always a project and my salary is always not enough, so, to make it possible I always borrow to friends or to any lending institutions. I have also help friends when they need a little help, only if I have extra money but I am very choosy since I had one friend who keep on promising and pay very very late. I don't like people who don't fulfill promises and those who will hide when they are not ready to pay!Gives me so much lesson!
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
6 May 08
its so hard to keep a friendship when money gets in the
way.
@LizAdams22 (35)
• United States
6 May 08
Hello, I have been a borrower and a lender, it is not an easy place to be. So I learned to help others when I can and usually they help me when I need it. In my family, we help each other out and it works out well. A long time ago I had the same problems with lending and borrowing others had, you help someone and they act like they don't remember its yours or that you even helped them. Times are hard right now and money is tight so it is best not to be giving it away, not that we have a lot any way.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
6 May 08
you are right money is scarce now and we should
take care of our promises and not make it we
can not keep.
@beaniecat (329)
• United States
6 May 08
I have never borrowed money from a friend or relative. I have lent money to several friends and family members. However, from now on, it will be my policy not to lend money. 99% of the time, I have ended up turning into a bill collecting and had to ask for my money back repeatedly. I don't want to be put in that position anymore.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
6 May 08
That is a tough spot to be in and you hate to have to keep asking as you feel they should know in the first place and just pay you back.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
6 May 08
yes indeed theworld has c hanged a lot but people are
still pretty much the same some will keep their
promises and some will not.
@vanities (11395)
• Davao, Philippines
6 May 08
i do when it is an emergency!! but to my relatives only..and repaid immediately ..and sometimes my relatives wont accept the payment saying that its a help..if ive got an extra fund then i will also do in returned...
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
6 May 08
vanities thats also the way I do its only in an emergency
and only to my relatives and my very best friend.
@Mamagee (392)
• Malaysia
6 May 08
I'm a kind of person that too hard to trust other people even though they are my friends. Sometimes we lost friend because of money. So to all my friends, I told them that if they want to borrow money from me, make sure that they can pay back after they got money. Some people just simply ignore to pay back. If my own family, I don't care much if they want to pay or not. It would be better for me to just give it out. I always give money to my father and mother, my sisters and brothers if they need it. I've never think of asking them to pay back. For me my family is my life. Once they are in trouble, it will reflect to me.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
9 May 08
I always help my son and mybestfriend but they are the
only ones I will do so with.
@jing_ocampo (135)
• Philippines
6 May 08
I also live by that adage with exception of lending to a family member. I found out the easiest way to ruin a friendship is by lending money to a friend as it breeds resentment over time.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
9 May 08
YOu are so right its the quickest way to lose a friend.
@gadevilgrl (24)
• United States
6 May 08
I once had a close friend ask me to co-sign a car loan for him. He desperately needed a car, had a job, just needed a co-signer to get the loan. After 2 months, he blew the engine on the car & refused to continue paying the loan, which, of course, forced ME to pay the loan. He wouldn't work it out with me - kept saying he shouldn't have to pay for a car he couldn't drive, so I had no choice but to take him to court over it. It ended our friendship - in his eyes I was wrong. My kids have never asked me for money (although one of them did STEAL $10,000 from me), I always taught them to set aside "emergency money".
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
9 May 08
my mom always taught me to keep a reserve just in case.
