I was drunk, humiliated and made awful crack and the whole world knew that!

@anex08 (868)
May 7, 2008 7:46am CST
Hi guys!! this is not anex08, I am her cousin named france. I was kind of nice goat today and my cousin anex does not want to hear any of my sentimental feelings at all. She said she had heard enough and got more things to do but i still insist, that I was just toning down my heavy thoughts of crap. She gave me the idea of sharing it to anyone else, into the whole world literally by using her account at mylot. Well, she was inviting me to join here but socializing is'nt my business so I could'nt do this regularly. Instead I ask her to use her account for one post and here it is, actually this is with condition that I have to introduce myself and excuse her for using mylot. here it goes... I was drunk last night and stayed in the office after our social gathering. My officemates came over to my table and ask me to go home with them, but I did not. I don't know what Im thinking but I was kinda strong that night and I have so much courage to say things at any moment. Then I start crying and approached my long time crush "mon" (He was also drunk but still manage to carry himself) I told him these " Mon, I have been waiting for you to show care for me for a long time, I dont know what's your piece but I'd love you and will still wait for you whatever it takes" I even added that, Im dying to get married because Im not getting any younger but there's only one guy whom I'd love to be with and it's you"... I can remember clearly what I had said and I know literally what Im talking that moment but I did not bother to stop myself. All of those in-front of our Bosses and in-front of my officemates and Mon's friend who came over. After that, I have watched his face with mix reaction and I cannot understand any. Only late this morning I woke up and have my mind back and remember everything I have done. Oh my!! I do not have the face to see my office again. I dont know what to do, I did not attend our meeting today which supposed to be done lately at 2pm, I turned off my phone. I just shut the whole world off. Its only my cousin anex whose around this time. She said, It was done and I cannot turn back time and everything will pass and be forgotten and everything will go back to normal I will just have to wait for a proper time. But you see, its not that easy, it's my mistake I know. Can I get more advise from mylot? Please guys!! need it badly. thank you...
2 responses
• United States
7 May 08
Well from what I have read you got yourself into a sticky situation. I'm not pointing this as a bad direction. Yes you were drunk and you spoke to a man that you have liked a long time. You told him how you honestly felt there is nothing wrong with that. You I think just feel you said way to much in front of alot of people when you should have waited for a better time to tell him but now it's to late to turn back the whole thing. You shouldn't feel bad about what you said or did you were expressing your feelings. You shouldn't hide from it either for it will only make things worse. I know this from experience for I have been in your shoes. I had a crush on this guy who was alot younger than I and I would go down to this one bar that I knew that he hung out at. I would shoot pool and drink and watch his every move. This guy made my heart skip a beat he was cute and I wanted so bad for him just to be like that to me. One night which was the last time I saw him I was feeling no pain had quite of few drinks in me and ya he was hanging w/ his buddies but I didn't care. I walked over to him he was at the pool table I stood next to him while he was waiting for his turn to play. He turned to say hi then turned his focus right back to the table I kept looking at him. It was his turn fineally to play and I watched in aww and I think one of his buddies saw my reaction for his friend said "what's wrong w/ you are you in love w/ him?" I was so embarrassed for not only did his friend say this but the guy I had a major crush on looked up at his friend then at me then looked back to take his shot. I walked away wanting to hide. I felt aweful. I ended up going out side and standing on the ramp to the entrance of the bar. I stood there for like 10 minutes and I hear the door open and this person standing behind me I didn't turn around for I didn't want to know who was behind me. Then I hear the fimilar voice of the guy I had a crush on say "you ok?" I said "yah" he said "what was that about back there?" I said "don't know your friend being stupid" he said " is it true?" i said "is what true?" he said are you head over heels over me and I'm now just finding out?" I said "yah" my throat was closeing up my eyes started to fill w/ tears and he put his hand on my shoulder and told me to turn around I did. He said "it's nice that you like me the way you do but nothing can ever become of us for there is another girl I just started seeing and I'm in love w/ her I'm sorry if you feel hurt by me telling you this but I'll always your friend ok?" I said "ok" he pulled me to him and hugged me and I broke into tears in his arms. He then let go of me and said "it's late you should go home and sleep off some of those drinks in ya" I watched him walk back into the bar and I slowly while crying walked home. I never saw him after that for he moved away w/ this girl and a couple of years later his cousin who I work w/ told me he stopped drinking got married to her and has a 1 yr. old daughter w/ her. I've learned that when you drink more than your share you tend to just say about anything as well as do anything. I do hope you forgive yourself for your mistake and know you have learned from it like I have. If you wish to opologize to him for that night do so away from everyone say " listen I'm sorry about the other night I didn't mean to come on to you so strong like I did I know I had a few drinks. I do you like you and if I can start over I would like to ask you if you'd like to hang out sometime?" see where that get's you for you might find it's worth the while. I truely wish you the best of luck w/ this situation. I'm glad I came across your topic and was able to hopefully help. Take care and smile.
@besthope44 (12141)
• India
22 Aug 10
I feel Drinking is really a addiction and not easy to quit all of sudden. But good thing is there are many rehabilition center for helping to get rid of these habits. to make a great change in life..I dont drink but i helped my friends and few of them quit addiction to drinks