My boyfriend confess he still loves another girl, i'm really in love

Panama
May 7, 2008 7:57pm CST
Could any one advise me what can i do?, my boyfriend confessed me the other day that he still have feelings for his prior girlfriend, that he is trying to forget her and he knows i am better than her, but he still cant stop loving her, i dont know what to do, he says that he loves me but if he still loves her is because i am not enougth for him like to forget her, please help me i am really in love, i dont know if i should stay and help him to forget, or leave him alone and stop loving someone that after 5 months show me that does not love me back in the same way. Greetings.
7 people like this
47 responses
• United States
8 May 08
Run like crazy. If he's with you and making these confessions, he's playing games. You shouldn't allow him to manipulate you with past relationships. It's possible I'm overstating the case, but I will give you this bit of advice as a man who's heard his friends talk about doing exactly what you're describing. If he *ever* says to you "It would HELP ME GET OVER HER if you would only..." (insert whatever he wants you to do there), he's scamming you, and he doesn't love you in any meaningful way.
• United States
8 May 08
Not my most useful comment...but I am so totally in agreeance with this coment...seriously.....get the heck out of there! No one who truely loves you would ever tell you they were *also* in love with someone else!
1 person likes this
• Panama
8 May 08
thanks for your response
1 person likes this
@Capndon (337)
• India
16 May 08
Bingo!!!!! I am with this response all in :) Kinda similar to my view too. See below. Great job friend :) Thank you
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
8 May 08
I really do think that you should sit back and think about what he means to you and what you mean to him. Evaluate the two and find out which one weighs in more. It seems as if you are loving someone to whom is not prepared to love you back. Have you ever heard of the "if you love someone let them go, if they come back it was meant to be, if not it never was" saying? Well if not evaluate it. Decide if you should let him go. Don't bother loving someone who can't return the same, becuase their is always someone else out there.
1 person likes this
• Panama
8 May 08
Thanks for ur response
1 person likes this
@rmuxagirl (7559)
• United States
9 May 08
SomeCowgirl is right. Sit back and think about things. It is not worth it to be with a man who isn't prepared to love you the way you deserve!
1 person likes this
@jesbellaine (4155)
• Philippines
8 May 08
I have been in the same "boat" like you before. I had a boyfriend in college; he told me that he saw the girl that he fell inlove few years back and confessed that he still loves her. It really hurt so bad so I let go plus the fact that he cheated ofcourse. I guess... you need to let the person go even if it will hurt you so bad because that is the only way to let the guy realize if he is really in love with someone else or with you... It is better for you to know his true feelings than try to supress him then later you will be the one who will be truly hurt. I hope that you will feel okay soon.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
12 May 08
I think you have to let go of the person, if he's for you...he will come back even if your not asking him to come back.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 May 08
I think that you should temporarly break up until he is ready to love you fully.
1 person likes this
• Panama
8 May 08
Thanks for ur response
1 person likes this
@ayrin03 (318)
• Philippines
8 May 08
i think he has to choose now..or maybe you both need spaces to think whats the best thing to do..
1 person likes this
@nengs10 (3188)
• Philippines
8 May 08
This is really hard. You are in a situation where you have to choose between self-respect and love for someone. In my case, I would probably be hurt by what he said. I would take it as an insult. Well, breakup is really the next option for me to make. But, it's still up to you. Fight for your feelings. Decide well and choose the best option.Kudos.
1 person likes this
@thealim (74)
• Philippines
8 May 08
Well i think you should let him go...though it really hurts but you need to move on forget about him...Just hope that someday or somehow you could still found someone that would worths better than him... those who could love you at exactly who you are...God bless
1 person likes this
• United States
8 May 08
i'd cut him loose now.he sounds like he'll go back to her eventually,and you'll just get hurt worse later.just the fact that he's bringing it up pretty much tells you he's not over her.
1 person likes this
@feeding11 (222)
• United States
8 May 08
You have already answered your question if you think about it. Why should you stay with someone first of all who can't love you the way a person should be loved. No matter how much you love that person he is not with you now anyway, he is still with her in his mind, his thoughts, his life. You are NOT. You are selling yourself short. And if you do decide to stay with this guy who loves another I guarantee you you will never trust him. You already have thoughts of when you are not with him in your mind if he is with this other girl. Honey that's just not good. Wouldn't you like to know that the man you are with is the one that Loves you and no other. Puts you first, thinks of you, cherishes you, adores you. Hello, the "YOU" is the important one and some day you will find a man that is "YOU" he is dreaming of and you the same of him. Finding that is the amaing part of your life and with all of that you will have a more fullfilling life. Just break away with this guy, he sounds insecure also. He's in love with another girl, but is settling for someone he doens't want. Not good. Life is good and you will run into Mr. Right, the one you are meant for.. It happens when it happens and no sooner so don't try and rush and find anyone. God is in control and believe me you will know it when it comes. Be patient.
@tintinn (277)
9 May 08
Hi uhave2knowme, sorry to hear that. I am not going to tell you to leave or to stay with him. It is only you who can decide that. But if you are in love with him, why don't you give him some time for himself.....I am sure, as time passing by, he will eventually forget about his ex-girlfriend....I think maybe it is because he had been with her for long time.....and he might still feel bonded with her or that relationship.....and you know, it takes time to forget things like this....so why don't you give him time to heal his heart.....and in the mean time, why don't you try to support him morally or in every other way he needs. If I were you, I would try to be there for him, support him, be his friend, etc.... I think one day, not too long from now, he will eventually realise that it is you that always be there for him. I think one day he will forget about her. But if not then just remember; there are too many fishes in the sea. Be strong, keep the faith and good luck!!! Surely your day will come. ^^
• United States
29 Jun 10
the same thing is happening to me too. And what im am going to do is give e time you should do the same i know its hard to hear those words that hes still into his ex buh we need to suck it up an suport them in any way posible so therefore he will be happy with me(in this case you), dnt give up on him if u really love em, because i knoe im not gonna give up on mine... gud luk n i hope the best for the both of u...
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
let your boyfriend do waht he want in the end he will still realize waht your worth are..For now just show to him that he is lucky to hace you..
@Buckabee (15)
• United States
10 Jul 10
If he is not loving you back then you should move on to a man that will love you all the way and fosake all others because you are his one and only love.
@youless (99288)
• Guangzhou, China
10 Jul 10
As far as I am concerned, I only allow my boyfriend loves me only. The love issue is very selfish. We can't allow that the heart is not full for us. We can't allow our lover loves another. If my boyfriend still loves another one, no matter who she is. It will hurt me. And I don't believe that he loves me because this love is not strong enough for him to leave another one completely. If he still loves another and can not love me only, I will let him go. No matter I am loving him so much. Because I know at the end I will be sadder. I should love someone who is faithful for me only. I love China
• Philippines
16 May 08
I think it's very unfair to stay with someone who obviously doesn't know what he really wants in life. He is cheating on you and to himself because he is staying with you for the wrong reasons. If I were in your place, I would leave him alone and let him decide what and who he really wants to be with. You're not just some object left to wait for he master to take notice on her. I'm sorry if I'm too harsh but I really hate it when I hear stories of ladies treated unfairly by men.
@mamuzo (225)
• South Africa
16 May 08
You need to get out of that poisonous relationship! He obviously doesn't love you, if he did you would be more than enough for him and he would not have to "try" to forget about the ex. He is playing you and you are letting him. My advice to you: Tell him to go rehabilitate his addiction to his ex somewhere else because you are not playing that game!!
@salonga (27834)
• Philippines
16 May 08
Your boyfriend does not deserve you! Let go of him and wait for another one who will love you more than any other girls in this world. If you will continue your relationship with him, chances are she will reconcile with her ex and will leave you like a hot potato, or he will look for another one that she will love more than her ex. He already confessed that that you are not enough for him so why stick with him. Give yourself some dignity and let God give you the man that you deserve. God bless!
@rsa101 (23627)
• Philippines
16 May 08
Well I guess in this kind of relationship it is you who is aggrieved in here. I guess if a person has not moved on with his past then he could not really love wholeheartedly. I think you should allow your boyfriend to moved on without you or there may come a time that he may love you as an excuse or denial that he still is in love with the other party. Let him try to decide what is best for him. But I guess behind all these things I would suggest that you thank him for his honesty to you. Although the truth hurts but its important that you know where you stand right now in his heart.
• Brazil
16 May 08
Well I feel that someone is going to have a heartbreak =P
@adoremay (2069)
• Philippines
12 May 08
I think you probably heard it. anyways I just want to share this. If you love someone, set him free, and if he comes back, then it was meant to be. Anyways don't wait for his coming, enjoy... Give the guy a time to think, for him to realize if he loves you more than than ex.
• Philippines
10 May 08
Hi there. I know this time is really hard for you. But what I wanna say to you right now is you have to accept the fact that he cannot just set aside his feelings for his ex-girlfriend. They have built a relationship in the past and they have shared so many things, I think. And that is not easy to just forget. It is not easy to just forget about someone that he loved from the past and I mean he is still loving right now. Don't be afraid to tell your boyfriend how you really feel about him still being in love eith his ex-girlfriend. If you sense that he has changed his feelings for you even a little bit you just have to stop your relationship with him. Find somethings that you can do that will make you forget about him. I know it is not easy to do but you must do it if you think you are losing him. There are millions of people in this world and I am sure there is someone who can love you more and whom you can love more than him. Relationships meant to make us happy and not sad. If you are not happy with your relationship with him there is no point for you to stick with him. You may not like what I am saying here but I think I am just sharing what I think is the right to do. I hope you'll have the strength to move on. You deserve someone better, someone who will really love you exclusively.