Do you want to get married at the age of 26-28?

China
May 9, 2008 2:34am CST
Hi,friends! I'm confusing now! I have a boyfriend in 6 years,and I'm older (one year)than him. Recently,I want to get married with him very much.I don't know why. Maybe my age is older and older. To be frankly, I developed the great inferiority complex. However, He is always seeking some excuses about it, such as no housing,work is unstable and so on. I'm quite sad while hearing these. I try to communicate with him, but I don't know how to start. Could you tell me how to do? And do you want to get married at the age of 26-28?
1 person likes this
12 responses
@phoenix25 (1542)
• United States
10 May 08
The situation that you have found yourself in is pretty typical, Katrina. More often than not, women who have been dating their boyfriends for years will find themselves waiting for the relationship to move to the next level. Usually, the relationship doesn't move on to marriage because the boyfriend is not ready to make a serious commitment like marriage or he just does not feel ready to step up to the challenge. Your predicament now is that you have spent 6 years with this man-boy. Now, he doesn't seem likely to ask you to marry him so you must now decide if you want to wait for him to come around to the idea of getting married, which might never happen, or if you want to say goodbye to this boyfriend and try to find another man that will want to marry you before you get too much older. It is a hard decision to make and not one to make light of. I can only suggest talking to your boyfriend and telling him that you want to get married one day. Ask him if he thinks he will ever be ready to marry you. If he can't give you a straight answer, it might be time to start thinking about your other options. 6 years is a long time, so in my personal opinion, you have given him plenty of your time and if he is still not ready to think about marriage after 6 years of being together, something is not right. Good luck in your relationship and I hope everything works out for you both.
@aowaow (1517)
• Indonesia
15 May 08
She dated on someone who's younger than him. It may work to a man who is older or the same age with us, but he is not. Mostly guy needs a time before engaging himself in a marriage. Dragging him into the last phase when he is not ready, may procreate a pull-back inside him. Later, he might just reject on whatever we suggest.
@phoenix25 (1542)
• United States
15 May 08
Men get ready for marriage at different ages. Some men are ready 10 years before others. There is no exact age at which men are just magically ready for marriage. The fact that this woman has been with him for so long shows that they are in a serious, committed relationship. Usually, people that are in a relationship for 6 years are headed towards marriage. I was simply making the point that if this guy is still skirting around the question of marriage, he may never be ready and the girl may need to consider that that is the case here.
@babymar (361)
• Philippines
9 May 08
yes, actually, i will be marrying younger than that...i will be 25 when i marry this september.... i suggest, you should talk to him, and if he really is not ready yet, then just wait til he is ready....
• China
9 May 08
yes, I plan to get married around 25, so ,two or three years later, I will consider marriage, too. BUt now, it's still too earlieh for me. Though at the time being my boyfriend is very eager to, I am definitely unwilling. He is atill at the beginning of his own business, no stable economic support yet. So I can understand your boyfriend's standpoint, if he even can't provide a house for your future marriage, how can he feel ease? Wait him 2 ot 3 years, if you think he is worthy of your waiting.
@sharay (2776)
• India
9 May 08
u defntly can get married at the age of 26-28, i got married when i was 26, i hope it is the right age to get married, neither less nor more..how old is he..if he is also of ur age, give him another one to two years to get himself settled so that u both can have a good future...but if he is older than you, try to get married as soon as possible and both of u after marriage can stand for each other and get stable
• China
9 May 08
Anyway, thanks for your reply. I believe I can deal with it after your suggestion.
@maquisa (316)
• Philippines
26 May 08
actually im also older with my boyfriend,we already talk about it and we decided that we should marry at the age of 29.We just make an arrangement about our future and things that we may be encountering,itz really hard to believe that age doesn't matter because based on my experience that age really matters,maybe your bf is not really ready to jump into situation that he can't stand too,maybe he just needs time and your support,just try to talk to him not so seriuosly but with lots of trust!Sometimes marriage is not the answer to everything that will make you stable and be with him! GODBLESS
• United States
25 May 08
I am 31 and I have never been married thank God I am in a long term relationship and its not broke so iam not going to try to fix it iam happy and he is happy and really thats all that matters me and him wear wedding bands and that is good enough for us the leading cause of dirvorce is marriage so why do it
@aowaow (1517)
• Indonesia
15 May 08
Marriage is better stepped in with the right temperature altogether and each party is supporting the emotional equally. Woman creates for the chance, man will the one who take the chance. If the woman is the one who takes the chance, the man will face an emotional pull-back. That time he will "run away". It works the same with a man who pushes his girlfriend to get married while she's not ready. She also will "run away". I give you two options, and it's up to you. One is to wait for his proposal. That's if you eagerly wait for him. Two is move on and find a man who's ready to get married with you. I know option two will be hard for you to choose, but that's the solution which is available if you want to get married fast, considering you'd mentioned that your age is getting "older and older". My last advice: Don't push yourself into a marriage when he is not ready. Step in altogether.
• Canada
13 May 08
I got married at the age of twenty-five. My husband and I both wanted to get married, so we got married. If your boyfriend keeps putting it of, he's probably afraid of commitment, and not the right person or you. You deserve so much better.
@jesbellaine (4155)
• Philippines
11 May 08
Actually, my ideal age in marrying is between 25-27 but ofcourse, that could change in terms of getting ready to settle down for good.
@abekah (10)
10 May 08
hi dear friend i think what the guy is saying ia right because i think you the two have to organise your selfs well before going ionto that marrage because some times it happens that when one is of the two is working and the other is not working it some times brings desrespect to either the man or the woman in which is not supose to be so at all .you love does not cares about age and can hapens that frinds can infloice the man by saying that the girl is older than him so for that matter he should say no the marrage but dont worry because God the reasonms why it is hapening so, my dear friend all what you need to do prayer if only you love the guy and then to suport him with what you have the marrage will one come on trough you prayers and then concerntration. stay bless and live long
@elitess (5071)
• Ipswich, England
9 May 08
I want to get married at the age of 26-28, it seems reasonable... If you want to have children is quite ideal, if you don't plan to have children... i guess you could marry at 30 years...
• Canada
9 May 08
maybe he is not ready yet... try to wait... getting married is not a race, where in you have to get to the finish line first. Honestly i am 29 and I don't have plans of getting married yet. I have a boyfriend but to face another chapter of life, im not quiet ready yet. or maybe i don't love that much to marry.
@lingli_78 (12836)
• Australia
9 May 08
first of all, i want to welcome you to the mylot community... yes, definitely i want to get married at the age of 26-28... i get married when i am 27 and i am very happy now... 6 years is more than enough time to know and understand your bf and i think it should be the time for you and him to get married... when i marry my hubby, we also have nothing... we have no house, car, money etc... but now after more than 2 years, we are getting much better and we already have a house now (even though it is on mortgage)... we are struggling but we are happy to be together...