How far would you go for your love?

@winterose (39897)
Canada
May 10, 2008 10:13pm CST
What if you had an internet romance, and you believed you were truly in life, would you travel across the world, give up your family and friends to be with the woman or man of your dreams? What ever you already met them in person and they were living with you or wanted to marry you but you had to go live in their country would you do it?
10 people like this
25 responses
@meiteoh (420)
• Switzerland
11 May 08
I gave up my family, friends, job and everything I knew to be familiar, and moved halfway across the world to be with my husband whom I met nearly four years ago via the Internet. In addition to that, I put up with a lot of cultural and lifestyle changes in my life - I have to learn to speak a different language, cook different foods and etc. So yes, I'd like to think that I went pretty far to be with someone I love.
2 people like this
@meiteoh (420)
• Switzerland
11 May 08
And oh, in case you're wondering, I'm pretty happy - sure, I get a little bored occasionally but it was/is nothing compared to what I had to go through with my ex. A lot of people were sceptical when I told them that I met my hubby online and that we were in an LDR for the next two odd years - they were convinced that it was never going to work out. But it did and we are both very happy people. In all honesty, not all Internet relationships will turn out great or remotely successful - you need to be grounded in real life, as in hang out together IRL instead of just keeping it via the Internet. You need to meet his friends, family, etc. And even that, it's not a guarantee that things will work out. When I made the move to join my hubby, a lot of people were concerned that I'd be "cheated" and etc so I was told to open a separate bank account and etc, etc. It has been four months; on top of my own cash, my hubby gives me money and well...things are good. :)
2 people like this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
I am so happy that everything worked out for you, it was a big risk but well worth taking for you.
@kenzie45230 (3560)
• United States
19 May 08
Well...I don't think I would have gone across the world. But I did meet my hubby online and I swore I would never, ever, ever live where there is snow again. And here I am in Ohio. The first snow I experienced here was about 10 inches. Grrr.
2 people like this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
24 May 08
hahaha too funny, well you know I live in the land of snow, and I hardly ever go out in the winter, I am housebound now because of my disability.
@lomein3 (31)
• United States
17 May 08
Probably not since I am a skeptical person. I have a friend who joined the website to meet people, and he paid for her trip to go to Greece. I don't know if she's still seeing him, we are now out of touch since I am no longer working. You never know for sure if the person is who they say they are or not; Remember Private Benjamin with Goldie Hawn, how she took off for Paris to marry that guy she met, to only find out he was cheating on her. I know it's only a movie, but hey that can happen in real life. And to leave my family behind, you would have to be a person who does things spontaneously. Lorraine
2 people like this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
well there are good things that come out of it too, my boyfriend of 9 years happened because we met on the internet good thing he was here in montreal and we got together physically.
1 person likes this
@shypoet80 (112)
• United States
14 May 08
If I loved this person without a doubt, yes. I would. Actully the guy I can't seem to get over lives in the Uk and I am here in the usa. He flew here, but I was looking into moving there to live with him. I was excited about the new adventure and being with him. I love travel anyways, and don't feel at home where I live, so it wasn't that big of an issue.
2 people like this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
glad it is working out for you
1 person likes this
@sun2day (1063)
• Virgin Islands (U.S.)
14 May 08
Internet romance! I would really have to question that. I personally would not risk leaving my friends and family behind for someone who am not really and truly acquainted with. There is no way I am going to do that. The world is too risky; times have changed. And if I have already met them and if they are in love with me that much, we would have to come to some kind of a comprimise. Internet romance to me is like a fancy tale.
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
not to me, I met my boyfriend of 9 years by the internet here in montreal, it is the best thing that every happened to me,
1 person likes this
@tyc415 (5706)
• United States
11 May 08
If I were younger and IF I would fly, am scared to fly so I don't, then I might consider moving to another country but it would be so so so hard to leave my family behind. My son's best friend fell in love with a young lady who was here from Norway and when her work visa was up she had to go home. Well, needless to say he is living in Norway now, married to her and they have three small children. They do travel back to Texas every few years and his family go to see them at least once a year. Hopefully they will be moving back to Texas before too long, that is their dream and wish to one day do.
2 people like this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
that would be so nice for you if they did.
1 person likes this
@palonghorn (5483)
• United States
11 May 08
1600 miles is how far I would go. I met my s/o online 3 years ago, and moved 1600 miles for us to be together, him moving was not an option at the time because of his career and how much time he had in. He is thinking about us moving south of the Mason-Dixon after he retires next year, but who knows what we will do, we are also thinking about buying a house somewhere in the area that we are in now. I did give up seeing my family as often as I wanted, since I only lived 2 hours from them when I moved here. However, moving across the world to another country, that I don't think I would do, I'm sure it has worked for some, but not me. I can handle a Yankee but a totally different country, customs, etc. not for me.
2 people like this
@mtdewgurl74 (18118)
• United States
12 May 08
Well, my brother has found and fell in love with a woman and he is moving to another state to be with her and moving in with her. They knew each other previously but she had been married now she is no longer and they got to talking on the phone nightly and love blossomed and he came for a visit to see her and they have just decided he stay and move in they are going to get his things in Ohio this weekend. I am so happy for him I told his have patience and it would happen for him one day. It is not accross the world or anything. Thankfully though he has moved closer to his family so now instead of once every few years We will get to see him every few weeks or more. Would I move away so far away from family? That is hard because I am very close to family and We rely on each other alot so I wouldn't want to move so far away. That is a hard decision to make no I wouldn't really move accross the world for a romance made over the internet because I have seen this happen with my sister she met a man and even became engaged but after a $1500 dollar for a airplane ticket and and all those miles from Austraila(he was orginally from scotland) They met and after three days realized they weren't compatiable at all like they thought. So it was totally a waste of money even though they dated a long time online and even used the Web cam alot you just nver truly know what or whom you will get personally or if you will be compatible. Online you can be whatever or whomever you want a fantasy person but reality invades when your face to face. Okay if I had met them and was living with them and then wanted to marry them and had to move to their country would I do it? Love is crazy and makes us do nutty things But the bonds of family are sometimes stronger and you have to think where you'd be if the love went sour who would have your back and such so I would make a compromise that we had to stay and live where they are for a few years before moving to see if the marriage even last. I would in that time be trying to talk my family into going with me..but I would make it a mandatory thing that I get to visit my family several times a year and have unlimited calling and interent privaledges to keep in contact with but it would be the hardest thing I would ever do. If I could even follow through with it it would have to be a really really really major love.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
I like that idea, prepare to move in the future, because a lot could happen in between.
@mtdewgurl74 (18118)
• United States
19 May 08
I guess it is good to keep a openmind about it, love does make us do things we normally wouldn't even think of doing if we weren't majorally in love. The day that I married my mom moved to another state. So at 16 I knew what it felt like to suddenly not have family there when I needed them and I cried all day. It was hard to see my mother drive away not knowing when I would see her again or talk to her. I didn't have a phone, no internet, we had to do everything through snail mail. My Wedding day is not something I want to remember it wasn't the most special day of my life. I woke up at 5:30 got dressed in a used dress my grandma gave me,went to the justice of the peace, got married,No reception no celebration,no wedding shower,went back to the house,new hubby went straight to work,my mom,stepdad and siblings gave me a hug and pulled out of the driveway to head to Ohio, I went into the house and cried like a big baby and waited for new hubby to get home. That was my wedding day. I still get teaary thinking about the emotions that raced through my head and all the other stuff rolled into one, having to start a new life of my own without the guidence of my mom or family it was hard for me I usffered depression for the first time and went through alot. I didn't have to get married but I chose to, I just never figured in all the different changes and emotions that I would be facing so it was a shock to my system,. But we have been together for 18 years in all married 17 years this June 6th. So I guess you can say I survived.lol So I guess this is a little of what someone would have to go through if they had to move away from family even if they loved the person alot they will never probably figure in all the emotions or trauma a move away can cause until it happens. Me I was fine till they started pulling out of the driveway then I knew then what it meant to truly feel alone. So if a person was to move away from all they know and love like family and friends I am hoping they will get better through it then I did the first three years because for me those were the hardest. You realize how much family and friends mean to you when they aren't there to talk to when you meed it most. So I would hope that the other person realizes how much their love is giving up for him/her when they move away from what they have and appreciates them and love them more for it.
• United States
12 May 08
If we were just internet friends, I would keep it that way.I wouldn't want to meet. I fear we would be disappointed in each other's appearance. If I were living with a man and everything was good and he all of a sudden asked me to marry him and move out of the country, I wouldn't do it.I am an American and this is home. And would never marry someone I love.I don't think mixing love and marriage works that well. But I could and would try to remain a long distance romance if he loved me but hated America.And I could see emailing a long distant lover and never meeting.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
but would you be able to do that for ever, emailing back and forth,
1 person likes this
• United States
20 May 08
Yes, I could.It would be okay that we never met. Just as long as we had a good relationship.
@suehan1 (4355)
• Australia
11 May 08
i don't know rose.its a hard one.i certainly would not give up my family and friends unless i was really a hundred percent sure that this person was going to be my partner for life.but if i felt they were i would definately make the move.cheers sue
1 person likes this
@suehan1 (4355)
• Australia
11 May 08
no i suppose you can never be sure oreo.sorry to hear that you lost everything.i suppose that you only live and learn sometimes,cheers sue
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
I agree you can never truly be sure of anything.
@ellie333 (21018)
11 May 08
There would be no way I would travel to the other side of the world and leave my friends and family behind for a man even if I did truly believe it was love, sometimes love is not enough and I would resent having left everything behind and eventually the relationship wouldn't work anyway especially with someone I hadn't even met except online. You awake from dreams. If they were living in my home and they wanted to marry and then go the live in their country that would be a slightly different scenario and I would have to visit their country many times, know that I would be free to fly backwards and forwards to see friends and family and feel comfortable within myself making this move. If not they would go and I would stay or they ofcourse could always choose to stay in my country eh! My personal viewpoint only. Been let down by men too much to risk all for even if I did feel it was true love. Ellie :D
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
I agree with you completely
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@ellie333 (21018)
19 May 08
Oh wow thanks for BR, really appreciated. Ellie :D
@ElicBxn (61063)
• United States
3 Jun 08
Not now, maybe if I had been younger. But until my mother doesn't need me anymore, I'm here for her.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
3 Jun 08
I never wanted to leave my family either.
@ElicBxn (61063)
• United States
3 Jun 08
Not now, maybe if I had been younger. But until my mother doesn't need me anymore, I'm here for her.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
3 Jun 08
I was never the type to leave my family either.
1 person likes this
@Antianara (608)
• Australia
19 May 08
I'm in that situation now but the best thing is that I will actually have to move closer to my family in order to be with him permently which is great.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
24 May 08
no that is wonderful, you will kill two birds with one stone so to speak.
• Canada
19 May 08
As you know, my husband and I are both in this situation. I spend half the year in AZ, and half the year here in Canada. Bcause of his job he can't travel the way I do, but we are working on that. When we can get it worked out so he can, we'll spend half the year in each place, bcause we plan on keeping our citizenships.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
24 May 08
sounds like you have the best of both worlds there.
@Hatley (164237)
• Garden Grove, California
11 May 08
oh my this is tough but I do not think I would leave the US for anyone,if the person I loved would not come here then the romance would be over. I happen to love my country and if which will not happen,but if I ever did remarry it would be to someone who is living in the US. as I am an elderly woman I do not ever want to marry again.beenthere and done that for thirty four years, good years but now I love being on my own.
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
me too I wouldn't leave my own country for anything.
@DonnaLawson (4032)
• United States
11 May 08
I don't believe that I would.. I am a Tennessean by heart and don't think at this late date that I would ever leave.. I do have a friend that met someone on the internet who lives in California and she is leaving in a couple of days to go and live with him.. She has sold all of her belongings except for a few of the necessities and is leaving to make a new life with him.. She sold her home, her vehicles and all of her furniture, and now if it doesn't work out, she will have to start over.. I think that it is a mistake as she had just lost her husband is was so very lonely but I don't think that this is the answer.. I do so hope that it works out for her, but I don't believe that it will, it was too fast and too soon.. But I do wish her luck..
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
I hope for her too that it works out.
@zed_k4 (17624)
• Singapore
11 May 08
Hello there, rose..I would do anything for love except 3 things. Steal her from someone else, kill someone for her and to change my beliefs just for her. LOL. Other than that, I would do anything at all and I don't mind traveling across the country or continent. Anything at all. I'm romantic like that.. I have never had an internet romance before, but I had this relationship once with this foreign exchange student but it was short-lived. The distance made us separated. However, it was mutual though.
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
yep the distance can be a real big problem that is for sure.
@wooitsmolly (3613)
• United States
11 May 08
I would not go as far as you are describing with your discussion. I have dated someone I met on the internet before and he was a couple states away. He drove to see me a few times and we had a relationship. It was short, though, because of the distance. It was sort of weird meeting someone I had "known" for over a year in person like that, but it worked out okay. Now he hates me! ahaha I think I broke his heart...
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
and so it did not work out in the end, long distance relationships are just so complicated. I am glad that my man is from here even though I met him online.
@gemini_rose (16192)
11 May 08
No, I do not think that I would to be honest. It is too much of a risk for an internet romance for me, I do not really believe in love on line anyway. I certainly would not give up my family for someone I did not know. If I had already met them and had fallen in love with them, I still would not do it, I would have to move country because I wanted too, and not because someone else lived there already, it would just be too much of a big step to give everything up.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39897)
• Canada
19 May 08
yes it is a very big step that is for sure.