I will survive!
@workathome4us (36)
United States
May 13, 2008 5:26am CST
Well, seems like the right place to take of my chest few things. I must confess, I was in an abusive relationship for 10 years or so. Yup you read right "was" and not that long ago. I was been a victim of domestic violence, but I was in denial. I was on and off of that relationship. No need to go in detail, however when I did finally saw the light at the end of the tunnel, I felt so free...yet as I reached out of the tunnel, I realize once again that surviving out of that "secure cycle" will not be easy. The difference this time was, I didn't look back...I kept walking forward, regardless.
Today I face the consequences of getting out of an abusive relationship, many labeled me as I was never really a victim, etc.
More importantly I face every day challenges to make those memories fade at a least, yet they still seems so vivid to me.
Hopefully with my firm determination: I will survive!...simply because I can't NOT make it! I stand by my goal set during the last hourse I spend under the same roof with the guy: "I rather die trying to survive, than to die without trying"
2 people like this
4 responses
@workathome4us (36)
• United States
13 May 08
hi,
thank you! hey...don't blame me I use to be very strong in my self esteem, self respect, etc. however all that was lost, so much that is struggle every day to find who really I'm, because i become a shadow of what he want it me to become :(
i'm just happy that i'm alive and that my kids are no longer trap with me in that enviroment
1 person likes this
@meiteoh (416)
• Switzerland
13 May 08
I guess people say such things because they don't know what it's like being in an abusive relationship. I was in one even though it wasn't exactly violent physically - I went through a lot of emotional and mental abuse, something which my ex still denies ever doing to me.
When I tell people, they say that it's nothing compared to other cases of abuse or they just go on and on about how such behaviour is normal in a relationship (WTH?!?) but abuse is still abuse irrespective of the degree or type.
I'm glad that you walked out; it will definitely be a challenge moving on but like what I saw/read here recently, living well is your best revenge.
2 people like this
@workathome4us (36)
• United States
13 May 08
is true, that is so true, people can be really mean and not symphatetic, including other females. abuse is abuse no matter which degree is! i'm glad you are out of that too :) don't waste your energy on making other understand what happened, just move on gracefully
if you ever need to talk, just PM me and I'll be there...and I mean it!
also abusers will always be abusers because they are in denial of their violent character, even if is emotional. they claim their behavior is not only but a reaction at our actions, as a defense. yup many may even claim been THEM the victim.
we see domestic violence in homosexual couples and they are cases that is the woman that is abusive toward her husbans (as strange as that might sounds).
1 person likes this
@lilaclady (28207)
• Australia
13 May 08
Yes you will survive, you are probably stronger than you think, I know it can be hard starting up again in the single world but at least now you are in full control of your life...there is a lot to be said for independence...good luck to you ....
@aiyreen (286)
• Philippines
13 May 08
i can say that we're in a very similar situation. i "was" in that kind of relationship too... people don't know what we went through so i don't think they can just judge us easily. go, and live your life the way you want it, and don't give a heck to what others might say. you don't have to explain anything to anybody but yourself
2 people like this
@workathome4us (36)
• United States
13 May 08
hi,
my support goes to you! Congratulations! thanks...
1 person likes this
